The Diamond in the Midden
by UniversalOverlordess
Summary: AU: Meet Fran. He digs up dead people. A year ago he unwillingly performed a ritual dance at a festival. Now, that forceful partner has come to claim...his wife? BelxFran
1. Will the Headache

Hey there, peoples! I am here again! With a chapter story this time!

Okay, so I am very nervous about this one. I really like it, but I _really_ want your guys' opinion on it, so please r and r and r and r and r... I think you got it. ^^' -looks at chapter- I think that this is the longest chapter I have ever written. I'm proud of it.

So, the plot of this story came when I was watching _Bones_ -I love that show- and I was thinking about archeology (bones while watching a show called _Bones..._ yeah...) and this popped into my head.

**DISCLAIMER: **I do not own Katekyo Hitman Reborn! because if I did, Bel would being doing all sorts of evil things to the little Frog. -fumes over in dark emo corner- 'I'll get you sometime, Amano. When you are not looking, I will get you.' I also do not own _Bones_, nor _Buffy the Vampire Slayer_. (If you guys catch the Buffy reference, you rock!)

Okay! -straps on parachute- Let's get to it!

* * *

If there was one thing that Fran was really good at, it would be giving into his friends in certain situations. Not that he wanted to give into them. They just knew when he was weakest to their charm. Like when Gokudera wanted to get the newest type of bomb that had just come out in Fran's home country (the kid was a weirdo when it came to his bombs). The plan was for Fran to use his connections ("Gokudera, what connections? I barely went out of my house on a good day!") back home to get the bomb (which was illegal in Japan) mailed to his house. Fran had said 'no' repeatedly, and eventually Gokudera gave up. Until Fran got sick, and he decided to try one more time. He succeeded, only because Fran didn't want to hear his whining voice with the headache he was experiencing.

Or like the time that Tsuna (bless his heart) wanted to free all of the frogs ('I can't have them hurt on my watch!') in science class. Fran had been sporting a rather evil migraine during that period when Tsuna had asked him to distract the teacher long enough for him to sneak the frogs out of the classroom. Later, after Fran had been given detention for throwing the teacher's lunch out the window in a moment of panic (the teacher had been about to turn around and would have spotted Tsuna if he hadn't), he asked Tsuna why he'd wanted to save the frogs. 'Because they remind me of you', was his reply.

Fran didn't speak to Tsuna for a week after that.

Stupid frogs.

Fran hated them.

His first day of school in the new town his mother had _insisted _that we wear the 'most adorable frog shirt ever!' He'd had a headache that morning.

Go figure.

His lovely mother. May she rest in pieces...wherever her ashes had been scattered. That first day of school had been hell. Literally. The school terrorist, the one called Prince the Ripper (the fake prince had the oddest laugh. Ever.), had spotted poor Fran in his shirt and nicknamed him Froggy. Even after the creep had graduated, the name stuck (even with his teachers) and Fran became' the Frog' for the rest of his high school life.

Oh how he had wanted to die.

He'd managed to keep his emotionless persona for two years of his high school life, until he was voted 'Most likely to die and no one would ever notice' at the end of his junior year. Then, a boy named Tsunayoshi decided that_ 'Fran needed a friend (_insert many hearts here)!' and duct-taped himself to Fran's side.

Fran could have dealt with only one friend. But wherever Tsuna went, his 'followers' went too. And so, Fran acquired more friends then he ever wanted.

...not that he didn't want them now, though...

Having friends meant emotions, something Fran was unaccustomed to. So, Chrome offered to teach him how to smile.

It was the worst two months of his life.

After that, the emotions came more naturally. Tsuna had said he even looked pretty when he smiled. Then the kid blushed and ran away; the boy ran into a wall, an open locker, Hibari, and a window.

His exits had never been graceful.

Fran later taught him to be stealthy.

Tsuna still sucked at exiting gracefully.

He loved his friends, dearly, but they'd discovered his one weakness; the one, single time they could get him to do what they wanted.

"Please, Fran! I know this dig site doesn't seem interesting, but Spanner's equipment shows that there could be an _entire _village down there! Whenever you go on a dig, we always find a ton of stuff! It's like the bones love you!"

And they _always_ took advantage of it.

"ADFSKHSADFKLATR KA GTS!"

Tsuna beamed. "I'll take that as a yes! Here," he said, and he thrust a ticket into Fran's hands. "I got us the best seats I could. Be packed and ready to go by tomorrow morning at nine. I'll pick you up!" He turned to go. "Thank you so much, Fran. I love it when you get headaches."

From where he was sitting at his desk, with an icepack on his head, cup of water in one hand, ticket in the other, and a scowl on his face (complete with the dark circles under his eyes and twitching eye-lid. Only $7.99 at your local headache store!), one could tell Fran did _not _agree with Tsuna. Not one bit.

He set the ticket down on his desk and yanked the icepack off, wincing as his headache flared up. He glared down at the ticket. "I hate you."

The ticket twitched.

Gokudera walked up and slapped Fran on the back, ignoring the wince and angry look he got. "Why are you all moody? Anyone would love to go on this excavation!"

Fran was an archeologist, and worked on dig sites world wide. He was two years younger than all of his friends, having graduated early, but he loved his job and wouldn't give it up for anything. "I just got back from a dig in Brazil, that's why. I still have sand living on me."

Gokudera laughed. "I'll gladly take your place!"

Fran didn't laugh. "You're on probation. You almost blew up that last dig site in Argentina."

Gokudera's laugh vanished instantly. "Man, why'd you bring that up?"

"Because I felt like it. I have a headache and you're annoying me."

"Oh, a headache, eh? Then can I ask you a favor?"

Fran stood up hastily from his seat, snatching his plane ticket as he went. "No! I need to go pack. Can you put my report on the boss' desk for me? Thanks, bye!"

He left the building before Gokudera could respond.

Hasty retreats. Those always worked wonders.

* * *

The dig site was located in some random small country run by a King, Queen, and their two sons. Fran stared down at the map of the world he held in his hands. "Tsuna, I can't seem to locate this land. Where are we going again?"

Tsuna looked at the letter he'd received from Spanner. "Uh...somewhere in Italy... I think."

"You think?"

"You know I'm not good at locating anything! I get lost in my own home!"

"That's because you inherited a freaking _castle_ from your grandfather when he died and moved into it! _I_ get lost in it! China would get lost in it!"

Tsuna stared at him. "You still have that headache, don't you."

It wasn't a question.

Fran sighed. "It became a migraine yesterday."

"How?"

"Gokudera."

"Oh."

That was all the explanation needed.

"_Flight to Italy is now boarding. Please form a line to hand your ticket over._"

Tsuna grabbed his carry-on bag and handed Fran his. "I do appreciate this. I'd take Gokudera, but after Argentina..."

Fran held a hand to his throbbing head and took hold of his bag. "Say no more. It could be fun. Just, please. No more talking. I took some heavy pain meds that put me to sleep."

Tsuna nodded, a small smile on his face. "I understand. But I must say, I do love this headache."

"Do you _want_ to be tossed out of the plane?"

"N-no more talking! Go-got it!"

"Good Tuna-fish."

"Hey!"

* * *

The air of a dig site always helped calm Fran's nerves. And his pounding headaches. By the time he and Tsuna had arrived at their tent, his headache had been dropped down to a dull thud, and he was quite pleased. "When do they want us to start digging?" He asked their guide, a local by the name of Enma...or something.

"Uh...as soon as possible, I think..."

This kid was just like Tsuna had been four years ago; quiet, unsure, stuttered a lot, and was great entertainment. "Okay. Sounds good."

Enma shuffled his feet. "Do-do you need any equipment?"

Tsuna held up a rather large bag; clanking sounds came from within, indicating metal. "No, but thank you. We always bring our own equipment."

Enma nodded and left the tent, rather quickly; a thud and a loud 'ow' came not a second later from the boy. Fran sighed. Yes. Just like Tsuna.

Tsuna frowned at the tent entrance. "Poor guy..."

Fran pulled out his bandana (green, with a frog on it. A parting 'gift' from Yamamoto, another friend. Ironically, it was the only frog item that brought Fran good luck on digs.) and tied it over his hair. "Remind you of anyone?"

Tsuna frowned at him this time. "I'm not as bad...okay. Fine."

"Let's get started."

Together they walked out of their tent an into the air filled with dust. _I love this feeling_.

Tsuna gave out a small laugh. Fran stared at him. "What?"

"You're happy."

Fran did a muscle check: his mouth was not curved upward, and the muscles around his eyes were not being used. "How do you know I'm happy?"

"It's your eyes. They are the ones smiling."

Fran decided to get new eyes when he got home.

Eventually they reached the area where Spanner was sitting. He looked up and automatically held out a sucker. "Here."

Fran ignored the sucker and hopped down into the dig hole. "Anything yet?"

Spanner shrugged. "A few pots, a possible hand. Nothing much," He winked at Fran. "Been waiting for you to do your bone magic."

Fran rolled his eyes. "You watch _Bones_ too often, Spanner." He held up the hand Spanner handed him. "Yes, they are phalanges, not part of the feet. See, if you look at the-"

Spanner took back the hand. "I can see, Dr. Brennan."

Fran glared at him. "They need to be cleaned properly."

"Yes, Dr. Brennan."

"The only time I will allow myself to be called that is when I make the same amount of money as her."

"Which will be never," Tsuna added.

Fran didn't respond. "Let's just get to work."

The three all bent down and got to work.

By the time the sun went down, Fran was the only one still working, Sapnner having stopped when some of his equipment started acting up, and Tsuna having quit an hour after. The day had been productive, the team having dug up almost half of a female. Fran sighed and wiped a hand across his forehead, beads of sweat pouring down his face. With his tongue between his teeth, he gently pulled out a small bone and turned it around in his hand. "I think this may be a part of the skull. I'm not sure, though." He handed the bone to his partner.

The man nodded. "I'll take it to get cleaned."

"Thank you."

The man left with the bone and Fran stood up, stretching he legs and back. _God, that was long. I haven't sat that still since that one date that went very...very bad. _Yawning, he made his way out of the hole and to his tent. He was half way there when Tsuna called out to him. He turned and Tsuna ran up to him.

"Hey, are you done?"

When Fran nodded a big smile appeared on his face. "Enma told me about this festival that is going on tonight. I think that we should go! It sounds like a lot of fun!" Tsuna's eyes were wide with hope.

Fran's eye twitched. "Uh..."

"Oh, please, Fran! I know that it doesn't sound that fun, and you don't like to go out much but-"

Why did this seem familiar?

His headache was coming back.

"-but it has all sorts of cool stuff from what Enma told me and-"

Oh yeah. His headache was back. With a vengeance. And It had brought a friend.

"-so will you consider it? Please?"

"ASDLKAFDLJADFSLJ!"

Tsuna beamed. "Thank you, Will!"

Fran was about to answer before what Tsuna had said came full circle. "Will?"

Tsuna nodded. "It's what I named your headache. I really like this guy!" He took one look at Fran and sweat began pouring down his body. "I- uh...I'll just...yeah." And he bolted, running at full speed in the direction of the castle in the distance.

Fran sighed as he watched him go. He then put a hand to his head. "Will, eh?"

Will the Headache began throbbing happily.

Fran sighed. _I seriously hate life._

* * *

Because he was bored and there was no way he could did at night (he didn't have super eyes), Fran found himself at the festival. He had to admit, it did look like fun; there were fire-breathers, random food stands, cotton candy stands (Fran loved cotton candy), game stands, a life symphony, a dj, dance floor and disco ball. _Not...quite what I expected..._

There were many people at the carnival, maybe even the entire village...city...thing. Some were dancing on the dance floor, others watching the fire-breathers do their thing, and others standing around the food, talking with each other. _Food..._ Fran's mind breathed. His stomach agreed and deciding that he needed something in his stomach, Fran made his way over to the nearest food stand. The man serving food stared down at him.

"Well, if it isn't a little frog."

Fran blinked at him. The damn name had followed him here too! He turned around. "Never mind."

Since his back was turned, he missed the man motion towards a guard and point at him. The guard nodded and disappeared from sight.

After Fran had gotten food (some local delicacy, titled Mushov) and cotton candy (he couldn't say no to cotton candy), he wandered around the castle courtyard aimlessly. He wasn't one to join in festivities, as Tsuna had so wonderfully put it. He was bored, and decided to leave. Just as he was nearing the exit of the festival, someone reached out and snatched his arm, dragging him back into the courtyard. Fran looked up to see a man with the weirdest mustache he had ever seen. He looked down at his arm, which he couldn't see in the mans' grip. "Uh, can you let go now?"

The man tightened his grip. "No on can leave the festivities until the festival is done."

Fran looked around the man at the people leaving the festival, all laughing and smiling. "What about them?"

The man ignored him and pulled him back to the middle of the courtyard. "You cannot leave."

"What's your name?"

"...Leviathen."

"Right."

Leviathen let go of his arm roughly. "Stay."

What was he? A dog?

_Sir, yes sir. Anything else? Like beg? Shake? Sit? I'm good at sitting. Very good at sitting. I like sitting. It lets me think about things, and then I have epiphanies. I like epiphanies and...I'm bored._

Leviathen turned to leave. "I mean it. Stay. Or else."

"I'm shaking in my boots..."

Levatheni sneered and left.

Sighing Fran leaned against a post and waited. _How long is this festival supposed to last?_

After an hour of waiting, Fran finally spotted Tsuna heading towards the exit. _Screw my being emotionless!_ "Tsuna!"

Tsuna looked over at him. "Oh, hey Fran!" He walked over to him. "What are you doing here?"

"I can't leave."

Tsuna smiled. "See? I told you that you that you would have fun. You just needed to-"

"No, I mean I _literally_ can't leave. The stupid guards won't let me."

Tsuna cocked his head to the side. "What do you mean?"

Fran nearly groaned. "I mean-"

Tsuna suddenly looked excited. "Hey! Look, the King and Queen have come out!"

Fran turned to see a man and women with blond hair standing in the crowd. Two smaller heads of blond were standing by them, looking bored. Fran thought that one head looked very familiar...

Tsuna grabbed his hand. "Let's go and see! Enma said that there was a ritual dance happening tonight. We should go watch it!"

Fran sighed and gave in, letting Tsuna drag him to the dance floor. _I think I'm getting another headache..._

The king was addressing the people when they arrived. "And it is my pleasure, for my son, Belphegor, to be able to participate in the ritual this evening."

Fran felt his heart drop as a man with blond hair stepped forward; his hair was covering his eyes, and he had on a smile on that Fran's dentist would be proud of. _Hell no._

It was Bel-senpai. The man that had made Fran's life a living hell. The one with the creepy laugh, and the one who had given him the nickname Frog.

Oh how Fran hated that man.

Bel snickered as his father tapped him on the shoulder. "Pick yours out."

Fran held still, hoping that Bel would skip over their direction, that he would pick a girl from the other side of the floor. But as luck would have it, Bel's gaze turned in their direction. Fran mentally groaned. _I think something is out to get me..._

The smile on Bel's face grew- if that was even possible. He began walking in their direction, and Fran began wishing he could sink into the ground. "Ushishishi. Look who it is, the little Froggy."

Fran blinked at him. "Hello, Bel-senpai."

"Ushishi. You still look like a frog."

"And you still look ugly."

The smirk slipped a bit. "Shishi. Nice to see you too, Froggy."

Fran blinked, suddenly noticing that he was alone. Tsuna had disappeared. _Thank you so much, Tsuna. You have been so helpful..._

He was shocked into movement when Bel put his arm around his waist and began dragging him into the middle of the dance floor. "Uh, just what are we doing?"

Bel smirked before turning to his father. "Found him!"

Bel's father smiled before turning and cuing the band that Fran hadn't even noticed. The band started playing. It suddenly came to Fran.

"No. I'm not dancing with a fallen, fake Prince."

"Ushishishi. Don't call me fake. And you don't have a choice." He grabbed Fran's hands and pulled him close, placing one hand on his shoulder; the other he kept firmly in his. "Let's begin."

They started dancing, some sort of weird mix between a waltz and a tango, Bel smirking the whole while and Fran having no idea what he was doing. "Uh, senpai...I don't dance."

"Ushishishi. The Prince will teach the Frog."

Fran sighed. "I feel so relieved."

Fran didn't know how long they danced, but eventually the music slowed down and the crowd of people began to clap. _Phew...it's over..._

When he felt Bel slacken his grip on his waist, he tried to pull away, but Bel kept a firm grip on his hand. "Can I go now?"

Bel shook his head, his smile almost dominating his face. "Ushishishi. Not yet. There is one more thing."

Bel's father nodded at him. That was all Bel needed. He turned Fran to him, leaned down, and kissed him.

Rather hard.

Fran's eyes widened in shock. He was being kissed. By the man whom he hated in high school. Who really was a prince. Who was currently chewing on his tongue. _What the fuck?_

When Bel pulled away, Fran was actually speechless. _Did I just get tongue molested by Bel-senpai?_

Deciding that he really needed to get back to the dig site, Fran pulled on his hand. Sadly, Bel still had a firm grip on it. "Ushishishi. Not done yet."

Fran slumped. What else could happen?

Bel pulled him over to his father and mother. His mother was beaming. "Hello, dear."

Fran blinked. "Uh...hi?"

The queen squealed. She actually squealed. "Oh, honey. He's so adorable!"

Fran cocked his head to the side. He was... adorable? Okay... That was a new one. The queen suddenly pulled him into a hug.

A rather hard hug.

"It's so nice to meet you, dear. I'm Willow."

_That's an odd name for a queen. Then again, I'm a boy and my parents named me Fran..._

"Hi...Willow..."

Bel's father shook his hand. "I'm Oz." He then turned to Bel. "You chose well, my son."

Bel smirked. "Ushishishi."

Fran was terribly confused. "This is great and all, but I really need to find Tsuna and get back to the dig site."

Willow frowned. "Dig site?"

Fran nodded. "I'm working at the dig site, excavating what appears to be a village."

Oz smiled. "So you're an archeologist, then?"

Fran nodded slowly. "Yes..."

Oz beamed. "Excellent. That means you are capable of taking care of yourself."

Said person who was able to take care of himself was still terribly confused. "I guess that is what it means..." He shook his head. "Can I go now?"

Bel and his parents exchanged glances. Willow smiled gently at him. "Yes," she then pulled out a paper with a fancy design on it and an old feathered quill. "You just need to sign here," she pointed to one line, "here," another line, "and here."

Fran took the quill and signed where indicated, eager to leave the festival. He completely missed the evil smirk on Bel's face, nor the satisfied looks on Oz's and Willow's face. Rasiel just yawned and looked down at his nails.

Done, Fran put the quill on the paper and pushed it back into Willow's hands. "Done," he said, for once eager to do something: leave this festival.

And country.

Oz took the paper from his wife and looked over it. His curiosity raised, Fran pointed at it. "What was that, exactly?"

_You probably should have asked that _before_ you signed the paper..._

Willow smiled, a very impressive sweat drop appearing on the side of her head. _Never thought that could happen..._ "It's just like...a witness statement. To prove that Belphegor actually performed the ritual."

"Oh, okay."

_Fran...really? Just like that? You really believe them?_

Later, much, much later, Fran would regret not listening to his inner voice. But that wouldn't be until later; much, much later.

Oz motioned for someone to come over, and Fran was most displeased to see Levi walk up. "Please escort Fran to his dig site, Levi."

Fran help up his hands in front of him. "It's fine. Really."

Levi didn't look too pleased either. "Your majesty, I think he wants to go alone."

Bel laughed, but this one sounded different then his normal I'm-going-to-kill-you-and-you-have-no-idea laugh. This one actually sounded angry. "Shishi. Levi, take the Frog to his dig site."

Those around frowned and a few even left the area. Levi sighed. "Fine."

Bel smirked. "Good. The Prince is happy," he then turned to Fran. "How far away is this dig site?"

Fran thought about it. "It's about an hours walk..."

He let out a small squeak (he was not acting like his normal self, although with his pounding headache and the fact that he'd just made out with the one who had bullied him his first year of school he thought he deserved a break from being the mono-toned archeologist.) when Bel pulled him close again. "Froggy needs more than one guard."

Oz shared a glance with his wife. "Lussuria can go as well," the king said slowly.

Fran blinked again. "I really don't need any guards."

Willow shook her head. "No, at this time of night you do. Some really weird people are out and about."

_You mean people other than you?_

"Really. I'm fine. I walked here; I can walk back."

Bel sighed. Fran nearly had a heart attack. Bel-senpai, sighing. That was new. Very new. "Fine. The Prince will let him go on his own."

"Good, good," Willow stated. "Come, Oz, Rasiel. Let us leave Belphegor with his friend."

The three turned around and made their way back into the castle. Bel turned Fran to him and kissed him again. "Ushishishi. It was good to see you, Froggy."

Fran put a hand to his mouth. "Is it a custom to kiss people on the lips in your home?"

Bel just laughed even harder. Fran began to inch away slowly. "Okay then... Bye, Bel-senpai."

He turned away, feeling Bel's gaze on his back. "Senpai. Your gaze on my back is making me sweat."

"Ushishishi."

With that Fran left the festival, not noticing Bel's hungry gaze on him, nor hearing the words Bel whispered to the air: "I give you one year, Froggy. Then I come to take you back. Shishishi."

* * *

"You owe me. Big time."

Tsuna began to sweat more, and it was not from the heat. "Uh... I-I do?"

"You left me. With Bel-senpai. And I had a headache. I had to dance with him. And then he kissed me."

"R-really? Wow..."

Fran stared at him. "You know, my Master still wants another apprentice."

Tsuna turned pale. "Iih!"

Fran's archeologist professor had been evil, torturous, and a great teacher, and was currently in the market for a new apprentice. "I can recommend you to him. I think he would _love_ you."

Tsuna looked like he was going to die. "I'm sorry! He just...Belphegor scares me..."

"He scared our principal. Our principal fought in the Vietnam War. I think that says something."

Tsuna sighed. "I really am sorry. I had no idea that this was the country that his family ran."

"It's fine. Just don't talk about this...anymore."

* * *

The rest of the trip went by smoothly, with the team finding all of the body of the girl. She was twelve, and her cause of death was still unknown, but hopefully, with time, they would discover why she died. Feeling like he had done a good job at this site, Fran was sort of reluctant to leave, however, Spanner had agreed to inform them if there were any items that popped up.

Tsuna smiled contentedly as he sat in his plane seat. "That was a good one. Are you glad that you went?"

"If you ignore the fact that I ended up being forced to dance with my bully, meet his parents, and be molested by him, then I guess you could say I was glad to go."

"I thought you didn't want to talk about it anymore?"

"I don't. You asked my opinion. I gave it. No more talking."

"Headache?"

Fran frowned. "What movie are they playing, do you know?"

Tsuna leaned out into the aisle and waved down a flight attendant. "Excuse me, miss, but do you know what the movie is?"

The girl thought for a second. "Marley and Me, I believe."

She left, leaving Tsuna looking worse for the weary. Fran tried not to smile. "It's a dog on a TV screen, Tsuna. I think you will be fine."

Tsuna shook his head frantically. "No, no... I will not be fine! I hate dogs! I'm terrified of them!"

Fran sighed. "Still? You know, that puppy was only trying to play with you."

"It was attacking me!"

"You had a steak in your hand. What did you expect?"

"Well it didn't have to bite my leg! I needed stitches!"

Fran reached down, tugged out his music player and out in his headphones. "Then don't watch the movie."

And he pressed play, leaving Tsuna alone to have his panic attack. He couldn't wait to get home.

* * *

_One Year Later..._

"Bye, Fran! Have a great trip! Call me when you get there!"

Fran waved Tsuna and Chrome off before letting his head fall and hit his desk with a very impressive 'thump'. He groaned as his head began pounding relentlessly. _I hate my life..._

M.M walked passed him, staring at him. "What's wrong with you?"

"Headache."

M.M sighed. "Well, get rid of it. We need you well for this next job; it's going to bring in a lot of money. I swear," she said as she reached for her coat. "You have a new headache every day."

Fran groaned. "It's still the same one..."

Yamamoto walked over to them, sporting as smile and baseball bat in his hand. "What's still the same one?"

Fran pointed at his head. "Same headache."

"Wow, man... Haven't you had that headache for like...a month now?"

Fran nodded his head before wincing. Yamamoto put a hand on his shoulder in sympathy. "I think that's a record. When did this one start?"

Around his work, Fran's headaches were notoriously famous. If one wanted to skip off on work, all they had to say was that they had a 'Fran-headache' and their boss would let them leave. It came in handy quite often.

Fran waved his hand back and forth. "When I found out I was going back _there_."

Yamamoto frowned. "Back to Italy, right? What's bad about that dig site?"

"Nothing wrong with the dig site," Fran winced again. "It's the ones who live the..."

"Tsuna said the people were nice..."

"The people, yes. The prince, not so much."

Yamamoto's eyes widened. "Oh, I see. I'm sorry. Hey, maybe you won't see him?"

Fran hadn't thought of that. "Maybe."

At that moment, M.M had had enough. "Oi! Fran, your plane leaves in two hours! Get going! This job is going to give us some big money if _you_ find something!"

Fran sighed and stood up, reaching for his bag. "I'm still not sure why they requested me. Tsuna is really good."

"Because Tsuna is going over to the dig site in Argentina, the one Gokudera almost ruined. They finally got it up and running."

Seeing as how Fran really didn't want to argue, especially with M.M., he waved his hands in front of his face as a sign of giving in. "Okay, okay. I was just curious." He turned to Yamamoto. "What are you doing here? You don't work here."

Yamamoto shrugged. "I owed Gokudera a favor, and he asked me to drive you to the airport because he was...unavailable."

"He got caught with bombs on his person again, didn't he?"

"Yes."

"Is he at the station?"

"Yeah..."

"And he used his one phone call to call you and have you take me to the airport?"

"Yes."

"That boy has issues."

Yamamoto shrugged. "Well, let's get going. You don't want to miss your flight."

"I don't?"

"No," M.M said through gritted teeth. "You don't."

With M.M in the mood she was, Fran supposed it would be best that he did what he was supposed to do. He said his goodbye's and left with Yamamoto. "I really don't want to go on this one..."

"You don't have to."

"I'd lose my job."

"Right. Never mind, then. You're screwed."

"I love how much you seem to care for my feelings and well-being..." He drawled.

Yamamoto grinned. "That's just the kind of guy I am."

"I can see that."

Yamamoto dropped him off at the airport and he made his way to the check-in.

_I really hate airports, _he thought as he took off his watch to go through security. _I mean, there are so many people, and it's way too crowded. I always feel like I'm go to be flattened against the wall. I'd hate to be in an airport during a time of panic._

He was nearing his gate when he heard someone shout his name. He turned and found himself staring face to face with Enma, their guide from the previous gig. "Uh, hi?"

Enma gave him a weak smile. "H-hi. I was s-sent here to escort you to the dig site."

Fran looked around. "They moved the dig site to the airport?"

Enma looked really confused. "No..."

"You came here to escort me, right?"

"Well, it is more like to make sure you get on the plane."

_I hate life._

"Fine."

Enma grimaced while trying to smile; it was rather interesting to see. "Let's get on the plane."

* * *

The plane ride was fast (he'd taken some pain medication for his headache and to help him sleep) and soon Fran found himself once again in the land that Bel called home.

He wanted to nuke it.

Screw the dig site.

Enma took one of Fran's bags in his hands. "I don't think that we are needed at the site for a while. Are you hungry?"

In answer, Fran's stomach let out a loud growl. "Yes."

Enma smiled. "I'll take you to one of the local restaurants. I'm kind of hungry as well."

The restaurant was called The Ripper ("In honor of the second prince," Enma had said), and Fran had not been too eager to enter. But, once he had, he found the food to be very good. He'd even been able to forget about his pounding headache for a little bit.

But only a little bit.

It came back with a vengeance.

Fran's life going to hell started with a wince.

Enma looked up. "Are you okay?"

Fran shook his head. "I have a headache."

"I have some painkillers; would you like some?"

He nodded, too tired and in pain to do anything else. Enma handed over the pills and Fran took them without hesitation.

He should have hesitated.

Twenty minutes into dessert, Fran started feeling drowsy. "Uhm...Enma? What, exactly, were those pills?"

He looked up to see a sad look on Enma's face. "I'm sorry, Fran... I really am. But I have to do this."

"Do wh-"

And he passed out.

But at least he didn't feel his headache anymore.

* * *

When he woke up, he was in a large king sized bed with silk bedding. The pillows were soft and cold. The first thing he thought was, _hey! My headache is gone!_

The second thought was more to the point.

_Where the hell am I?_

Good job, Fran. You win an award.

He sat up in the bed, noticing for the first time that he was in his pajamas. _That's odd..._

Growing curious, he got out of bed and walked towards the large blinds on the wall. He pulled them back to reveal two large windows, the sun glaring through them. Squinting, he looked out the windows.

He was high up, looking over a giant garden with many people tending it. Confused, Fran looked at the building. It was made of stone. Stone that looked very familiar.

_I'm in the castle. Great..._

Suddenly, he felt arms enclose around his waist and a body press up against his. "Ushishishi. Hello, little Froggy."

Fran wanted to die. "Bel-senpai..."

Bel snickered. "What does the frog think of the garden?"

"It's big."

"It is."

Fran sighed. "Bel-senpai, what am I doing here?"

Bel grinned evilly. "The frog is here because Froggy is the Prince's wife."

Whoa... Hold the horses!

"'Wife'?"

"Ushishishi."

"I'm not a girl, senpai, in case you didn't know..."

"Ushishishi. I know."

"Then why did I hear you say that I am your '_wife_'?"

"Because you are my wife."

"Since when?"

"Since last year."

"When last year?"

Bel pulled away and turned Fran to him. "Since we performed the wedding dance and then kissed and then signed the wedding documents. It's official."

Fran blinked, confused. "I still don't-"

Bel cut him off by kissing him. "Ushishi."

Fran, a little light-headed from the kiss, shook his head. "I'm having a hard time believing this, Bel-senpai."

A document was suddenly shoved underneath his nose. "Shishi. Here is the wedding document."

Fran took it and opened it.

"'The two below have participated in the ritual wedding dance, sealed with a kiss, and are now bound in the laws of marriage'..."

And at the bottom of the paper was his signature, right next to Bel's. He looked up and stared at Bel.

"I have no say in this?"

"Nope."

"No say what-so-ever?"

The prince laughed. "Shishishi. Welcome home, wife."

And Fran passed out.

* * *

And there it is!

So, you all know my shpeal on saving the stars, but for all of the new-commers: for every review, a star is saved. So save the stars, people!

Lots of love,

UO


	2. Note to self

Hey all of you wonderful people! ...sorry, I'm in a chipper mood today. I had sugar for breakfast! ...breakfast was a long time ago, I know, but the effects last for a while. I just wanted to thank all of those who reviewed. It means a lot to me, and I'm glad that you like the story! Here is the next installment. Hope you like this one, as well!

**DISCLAIMER: **I do not own KHR!. Not even in my dreams. My hopes have been killed because of this! -goes and dies in corner-

Here we go! Don't forget to review!

* * *

"So how long have you been an archeologist, Fran?"

He was sitting at a table, with only four other occupants. Th table was long, with dark wood and was neatly polished. The other occupants of the table consisted of Rasiel (who was looking out the window with an insane smile on his face), Oz (who was looking at Fran with a small smile on his face), Willow (who was beaming at Fran), and Bel (who was looking at Fran with a smile on his face that seemed to say 'I want to eat you').

This family sure smiled a lot.

But, like Chrome had told him, smiling was a good thing.

Supposedly.

Fran was still unsure about the whole smiling concept.

_Note to self: find a way to get Bel-senpai to stop looking at me like that. It's giving me the creeps...like he's waiting to violate me or...something..._

Well, Fran guessed since they were 'married' (here he hid a shudder), Bel could get away with violating him.

That was a scary thought.

_Maybe this whole thing is just a plot to kill me for something I did during high school. Knowing Bel-senpai this would be the kind of thing he would do. Married. Who in their right mind would marry Bel-senpai?_

_...Oh, yeah..._

_Never mind._

_Note to self: try to get marriage annulled. And fast. _

It took Fran a moment to realize that he was in the middle of a conversation. "About three years."

"How old are you."

Fran blinked. "Twenty-four..."

_Does it matter?_

Willow gasped. "That young and already working?"

"I graduated from high school early and with my associates degree."

"Oh."

Oz took a piece of toast and passed the plate around. "Do you like archeology?"

_No. In fact, I hate it with a passion. That's why I got degrees in it and I go to dig sites around the world and help out. _

"Yes. Very much."

Willow folded her arms. "Breakfast was great, but there are some things that we need to discuss."

_Oh god..._

"Now that Bel is married, we have to get Jill married."

_Jill? Oh, that is what Bel-senpai calls his brother... Must be a family nickname._

Bel laughed maniacally. Rasiel grinned evilly.

Willow continued. "Since we need to focus on getting Jill married, a task that will take forever if he keeps killing all of the suitors-" here she glared at him.

Fran was stunned. _I mean, Bel-senpai has always told me that he got his nickname 'Prince the Ripper' for killing people, but I never held him to it... I guess that I shouldn't have just let is pass, but I could never really take him seriously. Who _does_ take him seriously? _

_...besides everyone who went to our school._

_He wasn't that scary. All you had to do was become good at dodging his knives and him in the halls. Yes, he was fast, but I escaped a few times_.

"-anyway. Fran, honey, I would like for you and Bel to get to know each other better."

Say what? He missed something big, apparently.

_I suppose that I can sort of see where she is going with this, but... WHAT THE FUCK?_

Bel laughed. Fran was getting tired of that laugh. "Looks like we are going on a date, Froggy."

This whole thing was backwards. _So, he bullies me, then, years later, marries me, and _now_ we are going on a date? This is so odd._

"I guess so, Bel-senpai."

Willow smiled. "I have picked out some of the best and romantic spots in our land." She held out some papers that Fran took. "This one is my favorite," she said, pointing to one of the papers. "Oz proposed to me there." She ended with a small giggle. Oz looked at her fondly.

Both Rasiel and Bel gagged.

Fran stared at them. _This is the oddest family I have ever met._

Willow looked like she was going to say something else but she was cut off as a knife sailed passed her line of vision and imbedded itself in the side of Rasiel's chair. Fran stared at it. Bel snickered. "I'm bored."

Rasiel's grin matched Bel's. "Ushehshehsheh."

_Wow. That was relatively creepy. I actually prefer Bel-senpai's laugh. Never thought _that_ would happen._

Bel stood up and tossed his toast at his twin. Rasiel leaned to the side to avoid it; he was too slow and the toast landed on his head, the jelly sliding down his face. Both princes grinned.

Soon, the room was full of knives flying in one direction and knives flying in the other. Bel dodged one knife and deflected another with one of his; Rasiel caught one and threw two that Bel dodged with ease. The two were laughing all the while.

Willow smiled fondly at them. "Oh, boys."

Fran could only gape at them. _She doesn't mind this thing? No wonder they still live with their parents._ He snapped out of his thoughts long enough to dodge a knife that missed his head by inches; a few strands of hair were not so lucky as the knife flew past. The knife stabbed itself in the wall, a few green strands of hair dangling from it. Bel stopped dodging to stare at the hair.

All fun vanished from Belphegor's face, and he turned to his twin with an icy grin on his face. "You're dead."

At this point, Willow and Oz had appeared at Fran's side. "Let's introduce you to your guard."

Fran blinked. _My guard?_

The two rulers began to lead him out of the room. "Wait! What about them?"

Willow smiled. "Oh, they do this all the time."

Fran stared at them. _I'm scared. Someone kill me._

The guard's station wasn't far off from the castle. It was a ten minute walking trip from the battle scene Fran had left earlier. It was a very small building compared to the castle, but it was still ten times better then Fran's apartment. Willow (Oz having left to deal with some royal business; something to do with a butcher and his stolen knife...or something to do with meat) opened the door and motioned for Fran to enter.

"Let me get your guard." She left to walk down a hall.

Fran stared at the building. He seemed to be standing in some sort of living room. There was an interesting looking lamp sitting innocently on a small table by the couch. It had a very intricate design on it and, intrigued, Fran walked towards it. His hand was reaching out to grab it when-

"VOOII!"

Fran jumped; turning he saw a man with long sliver hair standing by the front door. He didn't look happy. The man had a sword, and was reaching for it.

_Great..._

"What are you doing here, you little shit?"

_I'm in trouble..._

"That piece of crap is very valuable!"

_Save me. Please._

"If you so much as put a finger print on it then you are dead!"

_On second thought, dying would get me out of my marriage. It would also end my life as well as my hopes and dreams. _

_What am I talking about? I don't have any hopes and dreams._

_..Hmm...Talk about hard decisions..._

"Oh, Squalo, have you seen Luss anywhere?"

Squalo, who had drawn his sword and had taken a step towards Fran, froze. "Your Majesty."

Fran turned to see Willow standing in the entrance of the hallway. "I can't seem to find him."

Squalo put his sword back. "I'll get him." He turned and opened a door. "VOOOI! LUSSURIA!"

Fran stared at him. _This place is freaking weird._ _Can it get any worse?_

A split second later Lussuria appeared and Fran took back his thought.

_Oh. My. God. It's a giant peacock._

The man gave out a small squeal when Willow pointed to him. Fran nearly had a heart attack. "He's _adorable!_ He's the one that Bel-"

Willow nodded. "Yes, so you better take good care of him, Luss," she said as she made her way out the door.

The peacock nodded enthusiastically. "Oh, I will. You can count on me, Your Highness." And with that he swooped forward and grabbed Fran in a bone-crushing hug. "I can see why Bel-chan calls you Froggy."

Fran decided right then and there that he didn't like this man.

If one could call him a man.

_This guy is flamboyantly gay. And what's worse he looks like a mutated peacock. _

_Note to self: never go to the peacock exhibit at the zoo again._

"Oh, deary, I can tell why Bel-chan married you! This whole last year he has been trying to-"

Lussuria was interrupted by a loud BOOM that shook the building. He let go of Fran, suddenly becoming serious. "What was that?"

Squalo, who had disappeared, came back into the room. "Xanxus caught Levi trying to sneak into his meat locker."

Lussuria visibly relaxed. "Poor Levi. I'll go call the doctor."

He walked over to the phone sitting next to the odd-looking lamp. Fran turned to Squalo. "Xanxus?"

Squalo glared at him. "Our boss. We are the head of the royal guard: the Varia. We also do assassinations when they are needed."

Fran's eyes went slightly wide. "Are they ever needed?" _Dear god... What kind of country am I in?_

"A lot. More often then one would think."

Sudden banging and yelling came from the upstairs; Fran winced along with Squalo.

"I didn't mean it!"

"Like fuck you didn't mean it!"

"I wanted some of your _juicy _and _succulent _meat!"

To Fran's ears, something seemed really wrong with that statement.

"You piece of shit!"

There was the sound of someone screaming and then all sound stopped. Lussuria, who had stopped talking on the phone, went back to it. "And also the surgeon. I have a feeling he'll need it."

After hanging up the phone Lussuria walked over to Fran. "Sorry about all of that noise. Levi just doesn't know when to stop and when 'no' means 'no'."

"He sounds like a pervert."

"Well..."

There was a knock at the door and two nurses walked in, carrying a stretcher. "Upstairs," Squalo said. The nurse smiled at him and began to climb the stairs.

The house became silent.

_I've got a lovely bunch of coconuts, dee dil lee dee, and there they are a-standing in a row. Big ones, small ones, some as big as-_

"It hurts! Oh, it hurts! But any pain from the boss I will gladly take!"

The two nurses returned, carrying on the stretcher the twitching form of Leviathen, the guard who had told Fran that he couldn't leave the festival. As he was passing on his way out, he and Fran locked gazes. "Oh, it's you."

"It's you. Pervert."

Levi opened his mouth to say something when a nurse bumped the stretcher; Levi groaned and the nurse smiled sheepishly.

"Oops! I'm sorry!"

Levi left ("I just wanted some meat!"), and Lussuria tapped Fran on the shoulder. "Let's leave, shall we?"

"Uh..."

"Alright, then!"

And he grabbed Fran's arm and dragged him out the door.

It was still bright outside, and the garden looked exceptionally beautiful, but Fran didn't even spare it a second glance. Instead, he was looking up at the castle, where smoke was coming from the dining room. Lussuria sighed. "Looks like Bel-chan and Rasiel got into another fight. Sooner or later we are going to be celebrating- I mean, _mourning_ the loss of prince Rasiel."

Fran blinked. "Rasiel? Not Bel-senpai?"

Lussuria shook his head. "No, Bel will be the one to kill his brother. He's been trained by both Squalo and Xanxus."

"He gets along with you guys?"

Lussuria nodded happily. "Oh yes. We are all good friends."

From what he had witnessed earlier, Fran could tell that the Varia was most certainly not 'close friends'. "Sure. Whatever you say."

They were silent for most of the walk back to the castle. "So his parents just let them attack each other?"

"His father says it will build character."

"They're, what? Twenty-six?"

"Yes."

"Wow."

They were nearing the back entrance to the castle when Fran remembered something he needed to ask. "Lussuria? I'm supposed to be a the dig site. They said that there was a new discovery."

Lussuria smiled. "Oh, that? That was just a lie to get you out here. There was no new discovery."

Fran blinked. "But, there was a letter, and my work-"

"They were informed of the entire thing. Apparently, Bel knows your boss, Byakuran, from one of his classes."

Fran stared at him. This was new to him. Very new. His thoughts turned dark. "I'm going to kill them."

"Who, dear?"

"Both of them."

"Oh, honey..."

_I'm never going near a peacock again. Ever._

_Note to self: never go _anywhere _that has peacocks near it._

"Why did he do all of this?"

"Because you are his 'wife'."

Somehow, it all didn't make sense. "Uh, yeah. About that..."

"Froggy!"

Fran looked up to see Bel walking towards them, the 'I Won' smirk firmly in place. "Ushishishi. Looks like you met your guardian." He looked up at Lussuria. "I saw Levi on my way out. Shishi. What did he do this time?"

"He tried to get into the boss' private meat stash."

Bel snickered even louder. "Stupid Levi." He then turned his attention to Fran. "So, about that date that my mom wants us to go on..."

Fran gulped.

"It's not going to happen."

_Phew..._

"Instead I am going to take you to a fight."

_Wait. What?_

"Ushishishi. It's one of the Prince's favorite places. Two men, fighting to the death." He seemed to smile dreamily at the thought. Fran felt bile rise up to his throat. "Shishishi. I'd love to get me and Rasiel in there."

"Why?"

Bel took Fran's hand and began to lead Fran to the front of the castle. "So I can kill him."

"You really hate each other." It wasn't a question.

"Ushishishi."

They passed maids and servants on their way out, and some of them greeted them as they went with, "Your Highness; Highness' Frog."

Fran slumped. _They even call me that dreadful name here._

Seeing the look on his face Bel laughed. "It seems that your only emotion is a scowl, Froggy. It's sweet."

Fran tugged at his hand, causing Bel to stop. "Bel-senpai, why are you doing this?"

"Hmm?"

"This whole, 'we're married' thing. I mean, I hate you, you hate m-"

He stopped when he felt something sharp at his chin. "Ushishishi. Careful, Frog. I might just have to cut out your vocal chords."

_There. That's the Bel-senpai that I know, fear, hate, and love._

_Wait. What?_

Bel snickered. "The prince missed this," he said, moving the blade up and down Fran's cheek like a caress. "Looks like the Froggy missed it too, ushishishi." He cut Fran's cheek a little and licked the blood off of the knife.

"Bel-senpai is weird and gross. Not to mention odd."

Bel laughed.

"Are we still going to the fight?" _Please no._

"Maybe... If I still feel like it when the time comes."

"Don't we need tickets?"

"Ushishishi. No. Because I'm a prince."

"You mean a moronic fake prince."

Bel turned to him. "That's why, Froggy."

Said Frog was confused. "That's why what?"

"Ushishishi. Figure it out, Frog."

They ended up wandering the land around the castle and (in Bel's case) bugging the people's inhabitants for the majority of the day. After Bel left to 'Ushishishi. Deal with some peasant issues', Fran found himself back with Lussuria, who was now showing him to his room. "And this is where you will stay, until you move into Bel-chan's room, of course_."_

_What?_

"Uh..."

"Oh, I know that you are still new to the whole being married thing, but eventually you will get used to the idea."

_Sure I will. Just like I will get used to having a giant gay peacock as my 'body guard'._

Lussuria stopped by a set of doors. "This is your room."

Fran hesitated before opening the doors.

_Holy-_

The room was huge, with a queen sized bed, huge dresser and an open doorway that lead into a huge bathroom. _This is bigger than my apartment! _

Lussuria giggled. He _giggled_. "Bet you've never been in a room this big before."

"Huuuuhhh..."

If Fran was good at showing happiness (or any emotion) he would have jumped for joy.

"I'll...leave you to it. Get some rest for tomorrow."

When the door closed Fran headed for the bed; he fell on it, marveling at the softness of the sheets. "I like you," he said to the blanket.

The blanket, being an inanimate object, didn't respond.

"The prince is jealous. Froggy likes a blanket more than me."

Fran's head shot up and he twisted around to see Bel sitting in one of the chairs by the fire place. _I didn't see him there before_.

"What are you doing in here, Bel-senpai?"

Bel twisted one of his knives in between his fingertips. "I decided that I was in the mood for some blood. I was remembering the good old days."

Fran suppressed a shudder. "You mean the days where you would stab me and try to get me to scream out?"

"Ushishishi."

"I'll take that as a yes, then."

Before he could move Bel was on top of him, pinning his wrists to the bed with a huge smile on his face. "I'm still waiting to hear that scream, Froggy."

"That's a shame. Earlier you said you wanted to cut out my vocal chords. You need to decide what you want most, Bel-senpai."

"What I want most?"

The way Bel was staring at him made Fran freeze. "Uh, Bel-senpai?"

Bel smirked and rolled off of him. "Never mind. The prince doesn't want to see the fight anymore." He stood up. "Good night, Froggy. Be ready for tomorrow!"

He left, leaving Fran staring after him. _Tomorrow? What happens tomorrow?_

_

* * *

_

_Day: the 17th_

_Month: August_

_Day of the Week: Tuesday_

_Current Mood: WTF_

_Reason for the Current Mood: Why do you care? You're just a diary!_

_Reason for Yelling at Your Diary: ...Bel-senpai._

_Okay, seriously. I am apparently married. Yeah, I know. But that dance that I performed with my moron of a senpai was, apparently, a marriage dance. And I did it with him._

_...not that kind of 'it'._

_Stupid diary, looking at me like that._

_I'm thinking that my diary is looking at me; I must be mad._

_Or tired._

_Yeah. Just tired. _

_My life sucks. I hate ti._

_(Note to self: add another check mark on the 'How Many Times I Have Said I Hate My Life' notebook)_

Fran paused his writing and pulled out his Hate notebook. He stared at it, then turned back to his diary.

_(Note to self: Buy new How Many Times I Have Said I Hate My Life' notebook)_

_So, the whole 'We Need You Back At The Dig Site' was a plot to get me to come back to this place, because I'm MARRIED! _

_Can you tell that I'm freaking out? Because I'm freaking out, Diary!_

_His mother and father seem interesting and nice; the normal kind of parents. But, as I figured, Bel-senpai and his brother are insane. And the royal guards. They scare me._

A knock on his door drew his attention away from his diary. "Yes?"

The door opened and Willow walked in. "Your Majesty..."

Willow shook her head. "Call me 'mom'."

_Say what?_

"Um...Listen, uh, _mom_, about this whole marriage thing-"

"I think it's wonderful that you have captured my son's heart!"

Fran blinked before continuing. "- this whole marriage thing is a big misunderstanding."

Willow chuckled. "I don't think so. Bel chose you."

"I have no idea why."

"Because he cares for you."

"The only thing that fake prince cares about is keeping his knives sharp, blood, and killing his brother."

Willow laughed suddenly. "I can see it now."

Fran cocked his head to the side. "See what?"

"Nothing, nothing!" She paused. "How did you two meet?"

Fran sighed. _This story... I hate this story._

_Note to self: add check mark in the 'How Many Times I Have Said I Hate This Story' notebook._

Fran took a deep breath:

"He said he wanted my locker, I told him to go screw himself, he called me a frog, I called him an ass, he said he was a prince, I said I didn't care, he said I should, and I repeated that I didn't care, he glared at me (at least I think he glared at me), I flipped him off, he slapped me, I punched him, we fought, got detention, then he slapped me on the back, said I was an un-cute kouhai and left."

Willow blinked. "Okay, tell me again, but this time slow it down."

Fran sighed.

_Not so impressive flashback_

"You're using my locker."

"No, I'm not. It's mine."

"No, it's mine; I want it, and therefore it is mine."

"Go screw yourself. It's my locker."

"Ushishishi. Stupid Froggy."

"Asshole."

_-cue screeching tires-_

_Sudden halt of flashback!_

Willow put a hand on his arm. "Can you put more detail in it, dear? I don't really see the whole picture here."

'Dear' blinked.

_Flashback, again_

The hallway was a crowded mess, with a sea of bodies rushing to and fro. His destination: locker A47. It was an ugly blue thing, with a small rust spot parallel from the actual lock. The lock was blackish gray, with the knob worn and the number '2' almost worn completely off. Numbers 5, 7. and 9, were not far from slipping into oblivion and being lost from the world. The lockers around it were in the same condition, with their paint falling off like a snake sheds its skin.

"You're using my locker."

The voice was a tenor, vibrating ever so softly, with a mixture of seriousness and laughter. The owner; a tall blond, easily towering over Fran, with long, powerful looking legs that looked well developed, a slim waist, not too thin, not too fat; just the perfect size for a male teenager. The arms of the owner were long and thin, but the tight shirt revealed muscle, opening up the option that the owner worked out. The face was sharp, with a very bright and big smile that revealed the molars; the laugh that exited the dark abyss was soft, but powerful enough to-

_-halt! Halt! Error! Error!_

_Sudden halt of flashback!_

"Um...maybe not so much detail. But can you add some emotion? It's kind of bland."

_Flashback...again..._

Oh, woe was him! This new life was not what he had wanted! A new home, a new school, a new job for his family! Why, cruel world, why?

With slow and deliberate steps he walked towards his locker, the blue paint reflecting the sorrow and misery he felt deep down to his core. Those around him were smiling and laughing; they had no idea, nor did they care, for his troubles. They were all completely fooled by the trickster called Life. They had naught seen the real world.

With slow movements that were created by his deep sadness, he reached up to open his locker.

"Peasant. Thou art using mine locker."

He turned, hoping to keep up his faceless mask so that he did not trouble this helpless soul.

"Pardon me, but I was told that this was mine locker."

The man leaned down ever so slightly. "Thou art sadly misinformed. Whatever I want, I get, and I have set my sights on this locker, here. 'Tis not hard to move to another location-"

-_Sorry, data is corrupt-_

_Dear god, are we stopping again?_

"Sweetie, I think that there is _too_ much emotion. Can you tone it down again?"

Fran sighed, slightly irritated.

_Here we go again..._

His locker was ugly. Really, it was. This whole place sucked. The teachers sucked. The principal sucked. The library sucked. The student body sucked. The classrooms sucked. His shirt sucked. His socks sucked. His room sucked. His mom's job sucked. His mom sucked.

...Well, his mom didn't _really_ suck.

His neighbor sucked. His street sucked. His washing machine sucked. His breakfast sucked. His bed sucked. His hair sucked. His shoes sucked. His life sucked.

The whole damn world sucked-

_-File does not contain wanted data. Delete file?-_

_Oh. My. God!_

Willow tapped him on the shoulder. "Honey? Is there some really depressing moment in your life that we need to talk about?"

_Besides the one where I met your son? Nope._

"Why do you ask?"

"That was very...depressing."

"I'm...sorry?"

"Can you make it happier?"

_I swear...let me tell the story!_

The sun was shining! The birds were chirping, the sky was blue, the flowers were blue, his shoes were blue, his locker was blue, the kid walking next to him had blue hair; life was going great!

With a smile plastered on his face with 'plaster on' glue, he skipped merrily to his locker, his many friendly animal friends trotting along beside him. Whistling a happy tune, he began to open his locker.

"Hello you wonderful, wonderful new student! I do believe this locker is mine!"

Fran turned, smiling all the while. The blond was smiling too. The whole world was smiling; everything was right in the world!

"I am sorry, good, dear sir. But this locker was given to me when I enrolled in this amazing school."

The blond cocked his head to the side. "Oh, but you see, I really wanted this locker, and I usually get what I want."

Fran handed his backpack to his deer friend who happily took the bag in his mouth. "I am terribly sorry. It is my locker, though. Perhaps we could come to some sort of peaceful arrangement?"

The blond smiled even more; the lockers smiled with him, along with the windows and the doors. Even the ground was smiling. "I don't think so, even though I wish we could."

"And why is that, my fellow lover of peace?"

"Because, I-"

-_Eat fire, bitches! Data is now lost-_

_Sweet mother..._

"Uh...I'll just let you tell it how you want to..."

_THANK YOU!_

Fran wasn't a social person. The 'make some friends' pep talk his mother had given him had gone in one ear and out the other. 'Make some friends so we can have them over! I'll cook for them and then we can have a movie night!'

If she was so desperate to have people over to eat her cooking and watch movies with her, then she could make friends herself.

...it wasn't supposed to be _that_ hard to make friends. Fran had never tried to make friends, but he could see those around him doing it easily. You laugh like an idiot, smile a lot, and make conversation.

Fran didn't do those things. Not even with his family. _Why we moved to this town, I'll never care to know._

He did know why they'd moved to this town; his mom was a marine biologist and had received a job transfer. On the surface he didn't really care, though.

Depp, deep, deep, deep, deep, deep, _deep_ down he did, but he wasn't feeling sentimental today.

As he neared the school he sighed, watching students yell out each others' names and act stupid; a couple of students tossed a ball in his direction. He ducked down to avoid it. _Maybe, if I stand here long enough, I can get a new strain of cancer that one can get really fast. Then, I can die. Faster than I wanted to._

However, the bell rang, and Fran slowly made his way inside.

His locker was ugly (he hadn't lied about that). It was blue and the paint was falling off in big chippings. _Just great._

He was opening his locker when a hand appeared next to his head.

"Oi, this is my locker."

Fran turned around and was met with _the_ biggest, evil grin he had ever seen. It belonged to a blond whose hair was covering his eyes. "Who are you?"

"The owner of this locker, Prince the Ripper."

Fran turned back to his locker. "Whatever. This is my locker. Go find your own ugly, chipping locker."

The hand slammed against the neighboring locker again. "Oi. I want this locker, so move it."

"Go screw yourself."

A hand grabbed his shoulder and roughly turned him around. The smile on the 'Ripper's' face was even bigger. _He would make the Joker proud._ "Ushishishi. The little Froggy is not getting on the Prince's good side."

_Froggy? Oh, hell no._

"Go away, asshole." He was getting a headache. This day was not going well. It was only seven in the morning, and he had already maxed out his talking for the day. Plus, he was being extra snarky. _Looks like I'm going to be using one-syllable words today. Sorry, Mom._

A sharp point suddenly pressed against his chin. "Ushishishi. Does the Frog want to die?"

"I think that you are a danger to this school. Is the hospital aware that you escaped?"

The boy laughed even harder. "You shouldn't talk that way to a prince."

"More like a fallen prince."

"Froggy really shouldn't say that..."

"I don't care."

The smile slipped slightly. "Stupid Frog."

Fran, whose headache was steadily rising in pain (and laughing at his misery behind his back; like Fran didn't know what that headache was up to), raised his hand and flipped the boy off. "Go away."

A slap to his face made him stop suddenly. The boy had slapped him. Oh, it was _on._

With one punch a fight ensued. Soon, both were on the ground, punching, kicking, biting, stabbing; Fran wasn't sure how long they were on the floor until a teacher had reached down and pulled them apart.

"Detention for a week, both of you!"

The small crowd that had gathered vanished instantly. Fran reached up and wiped the blood off of his lip. The boy broke the silence by laughing and slapping a hand across Fran's back.. "Ushishishi. Froggy made the Prince bleed."

Looking up, Fran saw that to be true; there was a cut on his hand, and he was staring at it with wonder. "Ushishishi. Un-cute kouhai."

Fran blinked. _Huh?_

The boy leaned down. "I'm Belphegor, the Prince."

"..."

"You must tell the Prince your name, un-cute kouhai."

"..."

"..."

_Stab._

"It's Fran." _That...kind of hurt. Wow. Impressive._

Belphegor snickered. "Ushishishi. Bye, Froggy."

Fran blinked. _Why did he ask for my name when he is just going to call me Froggy?_He sighed, before reaching over and pulling a knife out of his shoulder. _Ow._

"Bel-senpai!"

Bel turned. "Hmm?"

Fran held out his knife. "You forgot this."

"Give it to me at lunch. We can play doctor with it."

Fran's shoulders slumped a little. "No thanks. I'm not doing it," he said as he bent the knife in half.

_Note to self: stay away from the creepy slasher wanabe._

Bel's entire face frowned. _That's interesting._

"Froggy will pay for breaking the Prince's knives."

"I'm sure I will."

And Fran did pay; for the rest of high school.

He just hoped that he had been able to get Bel back too.

_End of flashback...finally._

"And that is how we met."

Willow stared at him, eyes wide. "Not what one would call love at first sight," she muttered to herself.

Fran cocked his head to the side. "What do you mean?"

"Nothing, dear, nothing. So, that is how you met my son?"

"I just told you the story..."

"I know, it's just...not what I had expected..."

Fran pulled his knees up to his chest. "It's not like we are in love, or something. He's just doing this to torture me." He stared out the window, his face indifferent.

Willow seemed to want to say something, but she hesitated. Putting a smile back on her face she placed a hand on Fran's head. "Get some sleep. You have a big day tomorrow." With that, she stood up and left the room.

Fran stared after her. _What's all this about tomorrow?_

With a sigh he pulled the blanket covers down and set about getting ready for bed. He was just climbing onto the bed when his phone rang. He answered it, facing going blank.

"Hello..."

"_Fran! Hey, this place actually has service! ...If you walk about five miles away from the dig site, but I wanted to hear how you were doing!"_

"..."

"_Uh, Fran?"_

"Tsuna?"

"_Yeah?"_

"You're dead."

"_E-eh?"_

"You knew...didn't you?"

"_Kn-knew w-what?"_

"About me being married. To Bel-senpai."

"_I...I uh- Ihavetogobye!"_

Fran sighed as he hung up. Tsuna needed to pay. A small, almost invisible smirk appeared on his face. He knew just how to do it, too. Dialing the number, he waited.

"_What?"_

"Master."

"_What do you want, little one? It's two in the fucking morning here!"_

"Do you still need an apprentice?"

"_...Who did you have in mind?"_

_

* * *

_

Bel was sitting on his bed, tossing knives at a target when his mother walked in. "Ushishishi. You should knock first; you could have gotten hurt."

His mother smiled. "Bel, honey, we need to talk."

"Ushishishi. The prince is busy."

"It's about Fran."

The hand froze mid toss. "What about the Froggy."

Willow sat down on her son's bed. "Are you going to do anything to make him like you?"

Bel began tossing his knives again. "Ushishishi. Nope."

"Uh..." That hadn't been the answer she had expected.

"You have not made any plans to make him love you?"

"Ushishishi."

"Nothing?"

"Ushishishi."

"Why not?"

"I'm a prince. I don't do labor."

Willow sighed. "It's not labor, Bel. It's..." she paused. "You do know that he isn't going to fall for you if you don't at least make an attempt."

"Ushishishi. The Frog will fall."

"And what makes you say that?"

Bel turned his face towards her; his hair fell to the side, revealing a pair of eyes, both orbs shining with determination.

"Because I'm a prince."

* * *

Well, there you go! In the next chapter, you learn what is happening 'tomorrow'.

DUN, DUN, DUUUN!

If you review this one, I'll hand out a plushie of your favorite KHR character. -gets out sowing kit- Guess I'd better get started then, huh?

Lots of hearts and love,

UO


	3. Tomorrow

Hi, people! How are you all doing? XD

As you can tell, I'm happy! Being happy is a good thing, so everyone should be happy! ...at least, that is what my therapist says. So, here is the next chapter of DinM. I hope you like it! I had fun writing it, so...

**If you didn't like it then you better beware -_starts up chainsaw-_**

Well, since that is done, here comes the warnings.

**Warnings:** Yes, I felt the need to put up a warning. _Lussuria_. All I can say is _Lussuria_.

**DISCLAIMER: **I do not own. La de da de da... Now I am no longer happy. -gets up and begins to call therapist-

'yeah, can I make another appointment?'

* * *

Fran wasn't a morning person. Once, he'd socked Gokudera when he'd tried to wake Fran up for a morning dig. He called it his instinct. After that incident, no one tried to wake him up again.

It was odd, since he usually got up early.

It wasn't a good match.

He had a hard time sleeping once the sun was up; for some reason unbeknownst to him, the sun always found a way to shine its light in his eyes. And since he wasn't a morning person, his mood towards any and everyone wasn't always the greatest.

"Fuck off..."

Yup, that was Fran!

The butler looked startled. "I- I am sorry, sir. I didn't mean to disturb you." He bowed hastily and left the room, closing the door softly.

Fran groaned and fell back into his pillows. _I hate the mornings. Everyone is so bright and cheery. I hate that too. _

_I just hate a lot of things._

_Like squash. I hate squash._

"I hate life."

"If you want, I can end it for you?"

"Eh, no thanks, Bel-senpai. That would mean my death would give you pleasure and I'd like to deny that for as long as possible."

Bel walked over from where he'd been sitting on the window ledge and sat down next to Fran. "Ushishishi. I'll find a way to kill you anyway."

"Do you often kill the ones you marry?

"You're a special exception."

"I feel loved."

"Ushishi. Froggy should."

Fran sat up slightly, looking over at his 'husband'. "Senpai, why are you in my room?"

"I felt like it."

"And that gave you permission?"

"I don't need permission. I'm a prince."

Fran sighed. "How could I ever forget..."

A sharp point dug into his cheek. "Froggy will never forget, because the Prince will always be there to remind him."

"Not unless you're dead, senpai."

"When will the Prince die?"

"When you die."

"And when is that, little Frog?"

"When Death decides to take pity on the world and remove you from it."

_Stab._

"Fine, I'm getting up."

He sat up, reaching over his head to grasp and pull out the knife Bel had thrown at him. Immediately, Bel stuck his hand out, moving his fingers in an up-down movement. Fran stared at them for a while before bending the knife in half and tossing into the corner of the room.

Bel frowned. "Don't break the Prince's knives."

"Don't toss them at me."

Bel frowned even deeper. Fran stared back at him, his head cocked to the side. "What was the real reason you came in here, Bel-senpai?"

At this Bel's smile grew to dominate over half of his face. "Ushishishi. The Prince wanted to see how the Frog slept. It was quite cute."

He tried. He really did try, but the blush came through and Fran ducked his head slightly. "You're weird, Bel-senpai."

Bel smirked. "Ushishishi."

[][][][][]

They were eating at a different table in a different room for breakfast, since the other room was being renovated. Again.

Oz was sitting at the head, balancing eating his breakfast and talking to an advisor, some person named Mammon.

Fran had a sudden mental image of a mammoth. He hid a smirk by taking a bite of toast.

Willow was sitting to the left of her husband, delicately eating her eggs. She and her husband were poised and had great table manners...

...unlike her son, Bel, who had finished his food in .39 seconds. "Ushishishi. The Prince is leaving," he stood up from the table and began walking to the door. "I'll see you later, Froggy." He smirked and left.

Rasiel turned his fork upside-down and placed it above Fran's hand. "Maybe."

A knife soared past both of their heads and landed on the table. "Ushishishi."

Rasiel stabbed the fork down-

Fran stared. _Huh... You'd think that at the angle he was holding the fork and how the fork was directly placed above my hand, that it would have impaled my hand, not-_

Willow was fuming. Rasiel, Bel, Fran, and Oz were all staring at her; she was visibly trembling, the fork that Rasiel had tossed sitting innocently in the bun on top of her head.

-_I wonder how that happened._

Her lip trembling, Willow reached her hand up and tugged the fork out, some strands of her hair falling out of the bun. "Bel, Rasiel..."

Bel laughed. "Ushishishi," before bolting from the room.

There was a split second of silence before-

"I WORKED FOREVER ON THE BUN OF MINE! Well, a maid did my hair for me, but I STAYED STILL FOR A LONG-ASS TIME! YOU WILL PAY FOR THIS!"

She whipped out butcher knives and raised them above her head- "Fran, dear, you might want to leave the room. Go and get Luss for me, please."- before letting out a battle cry.

Fran stood up from the table and walked quickly from the room. He was rounding the corner when-

BOOM!

-he didn't want to know.

He walked slowly to the garden, thinking of how Bel and Rasiel must have gotten their knife happy antics from their mother.

_And I thought that she seemed nice. Well, I guess everyone has quirks. Bel throws knives, so does hie brother, his mom throws butcher knives, Oz...I don't know what he does, and then there is me. I don't show emotion or react to pain or fear. _

_We'd make a good circus. _

The Varia mansion was quiet, for the most part. There were people running from the building -the maids and servants. One stopped briefly by Fran for a second. "Don't go in there. It's awful!" He began running again. "Awful!"

Fran stared after him. _What was that about?_

Shrugging, he began walking to the front door. He was about to answer it when his phone rang. "Hello?"

"_Fran! W-why did you do that to me?"_

"Tsuna...?"

"_Your master called me, s-said that you r-recommended me for his program!"_

Oh yeah. That.

"I thought that you had told me a couple of months ago that you wanted to be a better archeologist. Pineapple has one of the best programs out there. It's only for three months."

"_You're talking a lot."_

"I know."

"_It's odd...are-are you planning something?"_

"..."

"_I-I-I-"_

"..."

"_Ihavetogo bye!"_

Fran hung up, staring at his phone in wonder. Tsuna was really scared of Murkuro. He could use that.

He knocked on the front door. No one answered. He knocked again. No answer. Sighing, he tried the handle; it was open, and he pushed the door in.

The house was quiet; no sounds were coming from the up-stairs or from the right hallway. No lights were on, either, and there was no signs that anyone was in the home. "Hello," he called out, but no one replied. Shrugging, he began to walk towards the left hallway.

There were some noises coming from the end of the hallway. Tentatively, Fran began to make his way down the hall, listening for any human sounds. _This feels like a cliché scene from a horror film._ As he reached the door at the end of the hallway, the sounds he'd heard earlier were easier to hear.

"_...go totally crazy! Forget I'm a lady!"_

Fran hesitated. But he remembered that Willow had asked him to get Lussuria, and one did not ignore a command from royalty.

Well, it was more of a favor, but still.

He put his hand on the knob and turned; the door opened and Fran took a few steps inside. The sight he saw made him feel like his body was being turned inside-out. He was being ripped apart, limb from limb, the blood flowing live a river from his body. He could feel his body dying, the life source leaving him, and his soul slipping away and being dragged down into hell. Is was a slow and deliberate torture; whatever was doing this to him, it really wanted him dead. It was killing him, and he could do nothing about it.

Lussuria was in the kitchen, dressed in a tight black tank-top and short shorts that should never had been created. He was wearing a frilly white and pink apron that had red hearts all over, and was tied in a neat bow in the back. He was swaying his hips to the music, in time with the rhythm, and dancing along with the music, the bunny heads on his slippers bobbing up and down as he skipped from the stove to the sink. He opened his mouth, and that was when he delivered the killing blow:

"_I wanna be free, yeah- to feel the way I feel. Man! I feel like a woman!"_

Lussuria, to make things even worse, ended the chorus by slamming his hip to the side and emphasizing the jab with a loud 'oh!'.

Fran promptly turned away and began to walk out of the room. He almost made it- almost.

There was a loud, very un-manly gasp. "Fran-chan!"

_Ah, shit._

He made a mad dash for the door, but Lussuria beat him and wrapped his arms around the poor, terrified man. "I didn't know that you were here, darling! Come and help me make the breakfast for the guys," he said as he led Fran over to the stove and shoved a horribly girly apron on him. "Some of the castle servants were supposed to help me cook breakfast, but for some reason they never showed up," he said while he tied the apron on Fran, pouting slightly.

Fran blinked. _I think I know why._

Lussuria went back to the stove. "I'm making Boss's steak, so will you finish the pancakes?"

"He eats steak for breakfast?"

Lussuria nodded. "He loves his meat. You saw what he did to Levi yesterday."

Fran nodded and poured the pancake batter onto the hot-iron. "Is that his normal reaction?"

"Oh, he went easy on Levi, because Levi is part of our family!"

If he could, Fran was sure Lussuria would have been spouting hearts out of his mouth at that statement. He was glad he couldn't. "Family?"

Lussuria nodded enthusiastically. "All of us! Me, Levi, Squalo, Xanxus, and Bel-chan!"

Fran blinked. "Bel is part of your 'family'?"

Another nod. "He helps us in our assassination assignments."

_I didn't need to know that. But somehow, it doesn't surprise me._

"Oh, and you are part of our family, too!"

Say what now?

"Oh, don't look so surprised!" Lussuria stated in a happy voice, even though the look on Fran's face was blank (he was secretly dying inside). "You married Bel, so you became a member of this family!"

Fran went back to watching the pancakes.

"You know, we always thought that Bel would never marry; he's quite a violent person."

"He's a fallen prince."

Lussuria smiled at him. "And that is why."

"Why what?" He'd heard that statement a lot since he'd come here.

"Oh, nothing! =3"

Dear everything that was holy. An emoticon had followed that statement. _Just what, exactly, is with this man?_

Lussuria leaned over to his side. "I think those are done," he stated as he turned back to the steak. "This is done, too. Let's take it to them." He lifted the steak onto a plate and set it down before putting the pancakes onto a separate plate.

Fran took one while he took the other. "The dining room is just through the back of the kitchen." Lussuria pointed the door out and Fran began walking towards it.

As soon as the door opened, he had to duck as a wine glass came soaring at him. "Where is my steak, trash!"

Fran stared at the man who had thrown the glass. _This must be Xanxus._ "It's coming."

Xanxus glared at him. "And who are you, scum?"

"Ushishishi. This is the Prince's Froggy."

Fran looked over at the person who was sitting two seats away. "Bel-senpai."

Bel smirked at him. "Froggy survived mom's wrath?"

"She gave me time to leave."

Bel frowned. "She must like you. She never gives the Prince time to leave the room," he muttered slightly.

Fran rolled his eyes and placed the plate of pancakes on the table. Bel reached for one, set it on his plate, poured a river of syrup on it, and took a bite. "This is good. Lussuria never makes good pancakes."

Fran sat down next to him, dodging a wine glass - "I want my steak, trash!"- and placing his head in his hands. "I made them. I thought that you had already eaten?"

"I'm a growing boy."

"You're twenty-six."

"Still growing."

"..."

"These are good, though."

"...how do you know I didn't poison them?"

Bel paused in his eating slightly before resuming. "Ushishishi. You'll make a great wife for the Prince."

"I'm not a girl."

Xanxus tossed the wine cooler at him; Fran ducked underneath the table. "Could have fooled me, trash."

Lussuria entered the room and handed Xanxus his steak. "What could have fooled you?"

Lussuria dodged another wine glass – where did he keep getting them?- and sat down besides Squalo, who was looking at the pancake as though it was going to explode. "None of your business, you piece of shit!"

Lussuria smiled at Fran. "That is just how he tells us he loves us," he said with pride, before ducking under the table as Xanxus pulled out a gun from who knows where and fired at him.

Fran turned to Bel. "Is this normal?"

"Ushishishi." Bel pushed a plate with two pancakes towards him. "Froggy didn't finish his breakfast. Eat up."

The table grew quiet. Xanxus, who was in the middle of pulling Squalo's hair; Squalo, whose mouth was open in mid 'VOOOII!'; Lussuria, who had clapped his hands together and was laughing at his 'family', all turned to look at him and Bel.

Fran felt as though he was being dissected. "What?"

All three of them went back to their food, Bel not having stopped when everyone else did. Lussuria leaned over and whispered in his ear, "Bel doesn't care about anyone, so for him to be worried about the fact that you haven't eaten a proper breakfast is something that we have never seen before."

Fran turned back to his plate. "Bel-senpai only cares about tormenting me."

"I'd say he cares about a lot more than that," Lussuria finished with a wink. He then winced when one of Bel's knives found itself imbedded in his arm. "Ah, Bel. Why'd you have to do that?"

Bel smirked as he stood up. "Ushishishi. Froggy, time to go!" He reached down and grabbed Fran's hand.

"But I-"

He didn't get to finish his sentence, as Bel pulled him to his feet and began dragging him out the door. The sunlight hit his face hard, and he had to close his eyes for a while so that they could adjust. Bel was smirking down at him; Fran hated that Bel seemed to have had yet another growth spurt and towered over him. "I hope Froggy has had a good breakfast. We have a big day today."

_Again, what is all of the reminders about 'today?' What is so special about today?'_

"Uh, senpai, what is happening today?"

Bel either didn't hear him, or was ignoring him. Fran was betting on the latter. "Bel-senpai!"

Nothing.

Fran frowned. "Looks like I'll just go say 'yes' to Rasiel."

_That _got Bel's attention. "Say 'yes' to who and to what?"

"Nothing. I just thought that this would get your attention."

"It was rude, Frog."

"That was the point, senpai."

Bel was silent. Then he smiled. "Ushishishi. We have an hour until we have to meet my parents for today. The Prince is bored. Froggy should entertain me."

"Entertain you ho-"

He wasn't able to finish his sentence as Bel yanked him forward and place a very hard and wet kiss on his lips. Frozen, Fran could only stand there as Bel proceeded to rape his mouth.

Fran had only ever been kissed by one other person, and he didn't really consider that a kiss. He'd been in college (he'd never been asked out on a date. Not that he'd ever wanted to be asked out on a date.), and was asked -more like forced- to go to a party with Chrome. She was dating this one guy (Fran didn't remember his name) and was going to his frat party, but she wasn't sure about the friends he'd had and so she wanted some protection.

Why she'd asked him, he would never know.

So he'd went to the party. He'd stayed in the farthest corner, but he'd gone to the party nonetheless. About three hours into the party, Fran was more bored than he normally was in his history class, and wanted to leave. He walked around, trying to find Chrome, and then he found a drink shoved into his hands.

"Drink!" Those around had shouted.

Since there were around fifty people staring at him, he put the class to his lips and took a small sip.

A cheer went up through the crowd and the people began to go back to what they had previously been doing; Fran went back to trying to find Chrome. Twenty minutes later, Fran's thoughts were becoming hard to understand and his eyesight was blurry. Suddenly, he felt his back collide with the wall and found himself staring up into the face of Chrome's boyfriend's best friend.

Wow. That was a lot of apostrophes.

"Hello, cutie," he'd purred. "If you're bored, I can show you a great time." And he then planted his lips on Fran's.

He'd been kissed for two seconds before he landed a kick to the man's most sensitive area.

He and Chrome were kicked out of the party and a day later Chrome broke up with her boyfriend.

This kiss with Bel was not at all like his kiss with the other guy. Bel was holding him tight, one hand at the small of his back and the other holding the nape of his neck while his tongue tried to memorize every nook and cranny of Fran's mouth. He was so stunned by the suddenness of the kiss that it took him a good minute to realize that he was kissing back.

_What the hell?_!

Bel moaned into his mouth before pulling away. Fran was surprised to find that he was rather disappointed. Bel stared at him for a second, his face relaxed before it broke into a huge grin. "Ushishishi. Looks like Froggy liked that one."

Fran jerked back from Bel's grip. "Stupid senpai," he muttered, trying to stop the blush that was rising on his cheeks.

"Ushishishi."

[][][][][]

They were almost an hour late to their meeting with Bel's parents. When they ran in, both semi flushed, Willow and Oz gave them knowing looks. Fran stared them down. "It's not what you think."

It really wasn't what they had thought. Bel had only kissed him three other times after that first one; Fran learned that when Bel wanted something, he got it, and when he wanted a kiss from 'his Froggy', he got it. After he'd gotten his kisses, he'd dragged Fran through the castle, showing him the library -they'd spent a lot of time in there (reading, people, _reading! _Well, Fran read. Bel tossed sharp objects at him._)_-, and through the halls. The people they passed stared at them with awe.

"Aw! Aren't they so cute together?" A maid squealed as Bel yanked Fran down the hall by his hand.

Awe. I said awe!

"I know! I mean, I've heard Master Belphegor talk about this mysterious 'frog' person for a very long time, but I never thought that this 'frog' would be so cute!"

"I know! I heard that Master Belphegor had Fran's room specially made, with some of the softest materials we have in the castle!"

AWE, people! AWE!

"Who knew that Master Belphegor would fall in love! It's so CUUUUUTTEEEEEEE!"

I give up... You're all fired...

Oz shook his head as Fran opened his mouth to explain. "It doesn't matter. We have kept the people waiting long enough."

Fran stared at them in confusion. "What's going on?"

Willow placed her hands on his shoulders. "We just want you to meet the people."

"But I-"

The curtain that was blocking the light from the room opened, and the sun immediately targeted Fran. Blinking a few times, his eyes adjusted and he had to hold back a gasp: there were hundreds -no, _thousands_- of people gathered around the castle, all of them staring up at the royal family.

And him.

They were also looking at him.

He felt really inadequate.

Oz shoved him forward; Bel followed suit. "My wonderful people!"

The crowd stopped chatting and began listening intently. Oz cleared his throat. "As you all know, my second son, Belphegor, performed the ritual marriage dance last year this coming month," the crowd seemed to nod in unison, "but, due to unforeseen circumstances, he was not able to be with his chosen one until earlier this week."

The crowd all gave out a very long '_aww..._'

What was this? A really bad remake of Harry Potter? What was with the 'chosen one'?

A lone sob broke through the silence of the crowd. Fran looked down to see a brown haired girl crying into a friend's shoulder. _She must have liked Bel-senpai... What happened to her to make her brain stop working normally? Who in their right mind would like Bel-senpai?_

…

…_...Let me die, right now. Please._

Sadly, no lightning nor giant earthquakes came to answer his plea.

_Pansy!_

Oz continued. "But now, his chosen one has been returned to him; they met in high school, and after Bel graduated they both went their separate ways." He suddenly shoved Fran forward and into the light. "This is Fran; you will all treat him the way you treat us. He is part of the royal family now."

A cheer went up through the crowd. A few squeals of 'he's so cute!' were heard. Bel put an arm around Fran's shoulders and smirked. "Ushishishi."

Once the cheering had settled down, Oz continued. "Now, our traditional Task can begin."

_Traditional Task...what traditional Task? _

"For one month, they will need to rely on each other. For one month, will they need to trust each other. It is the ultimate test! As you all know," here he turned to stare at Rasiel who was idly twirling a knife and smirking. "My oldest son (by two minutes, mind you) and his previous partner did not pass the test and the girl died."

_Well, this is making me feel better about what I have to do_. _And did he say one _month?

"Let us hope that the bond between my son and his partner is strong enough to survive-"

Maybe the whole situation would have felt better if they'd played some sort of drum roll, or a theme song.

"-the Jungle of Death."

Fran blinked.

Say what?

"This jungle has been crafted by my ancestor's hands. There are a range of different animals and plants in this jungle, along with many different types of obstacles. This jungle is very dangerous, who knows what could jump out at you at any moment. That is where the test begins."

Bel suddenly pulled him towards him. "Ushishi. Let's hope we can 'trust' each other, Froggy." And with that he leaned down and planted a very firm kiss on Fran's lips. The stayed like that for a while before Fran felt a pressure between his neck and shoulder. His vision began to darken, but before he sank completely into the darkness he felt hot breath on his ear and heard a small whisper:

"I won't let _anything_ happen to you."

Fran really wanted to believe it, too.

[][][][][]

Tsuna was a good friend. In fact, that was his title at his old high school: Tsunayoshi Sawada, the Best Friend You Could Ask For (he also received the No-Good Tsuna award, but he got that one every year and he didn't want to feel depressed all of the time so he didn't think about it). He was always there for his friends whenever they needed him. Always. He was good Old Mister Reliable.

...when he wasn't running from the people who scared him (like Hibari), tripping over nothing, and making trips to the E.R when one of his tools cut his hand open.

Those tools were out to get him, he knew it.

He remembered the very first time he saw Fran. At the end of every school year, there was an assembly to hand out rewards to every student. It took forever, but they got out of all of their classes and got to see what they had been nominated for. He had been sitting with Gokudera, Yamamoto, and Chrome during the assembly, all of them chatting away and trying to reassure Chrome that yes, the eye patch looked fine- cute even, and yes, they still loved her, and no, no one was going to think of her as a freak for only having one working eye. It wasn't her fault that the baseball had been going over ninety when it had hit her.

The principal had just given Jeffery Carlton his reward -best jock- when he called out a name Tsuna had never heard before. "Fran Ricci."

Tsuna had stopped talking to Gokudera to look up at the small (he was about the same size as Tsuna, and Tsuna was short), green haired boy walking up the stairs to the principal, his body language saying 'I really don't care about this, why did you call me up?' The students around him were whispering.

"Who is that kid?"

"I think he sits behind me in math class, but I'm not sure."

"What was his name again?"

"Is he a transfer student?"

"Is he new? I've never seen him before."

"Wait, I think that is the Frog."

"Really? Well, I can kind of see it."

"Yeah, the hair..."

It was enough to spike Tsuna's interest. He'd most certainly never seen the other boy around, and he wanted to meet him. The boy had reached the principal by the time Tsuna looked back up to the stage. The principal seemed to hesitate before he gave the boy the paper award. Fran took one look at it, his face blank. The assistant principal walked over to him, a big smile on her face.

"What did you get nominated for, sweetie?"

Fran stared at her before saying, in the most mono-toned voice Tsuna had ever heard, "You missed a spot when you were shaving your uni-brow, miss, and there is a wart growing on your lower lip." and then proceeding to wander off the stage.

It was right then and there, while the assistant principal screeched and whipped out her mini mirror and stared in horror at it, that Tsuna decided to get to know this boy. He looked like he needed a friend. And Tsuna was just the friend for him to have.

It wasn't until during his senior year, though, that he was able to act out his plan. He took a mental note of every class he or one of his friends had with Fran and began planning his strategy. One month into the school year, everything was set. It all started in English class, when the teacher decided to pair everyone up for a project.

"Now, class, I want you to pair up for a project. We are going to be reading _Their Eyes Were Watching God, _and when you have finished it, you and your partner are going to write a five page essay on it, and recreate one of the scenes together. Now, split up."

Tsuna, being the determined one he was, made a beeline right for Fran's desk at the back of the room. Fran stared at his desk for a while before slowly raising his head up. Tsuna smiled at him. Fran didn't smile back. "Hi," Tsuna said.

Fran went back to reading his book.

"H-hey! I'm trying to be nice to you!"

Fran looked back up at him again. "Hi," he replied, his face as blank as the board in front of the room.

Tsuna smiled an even bigger smile. "Do you want to be partners for this?"

Fran looked at him like he was a whale riding a donkey at the state fair; even though his face was void of any emotion, Tsuna was pretty sure that was what he had been thinking. "Sure..."

And so began their wonderful, trust-filled, and amazing friendship! They had wonderful adventures with rainbows and unicorns and all fell in love the end!

"...can you scoot over a bit? You're in my bubble."

"Oh, s-sure!"

"You stutter a lot."

"I-I do?"

"Yes. It's kind of annoying. And it shows that you have little to no self esteem."

"Uh...uh..."

"If you don't have anything to say, then don't make those noises; it lets people assume that you are going to say something, and then they lie in wait for you to actually say something. And then you let them down when you fail to say something, and then they realize that you just wasted a minute of their life and become angry at you."

Fran paused.

"At least that's what my therapist told me."

And he went back to reading his book.

Tsuna stared at him, his expression unable to be read. Fran twitched slightly. "That's the most I've ever said to anyone..." He stated, as if having an epiphany.

Yes, their relationship was so full of rainbows and love.

Their relationship progressed from there. Tsuna found out that Gokudera had math with Fran and that Yamamoto had science with him. They all had lunch together, and after 'teaching' Fran that he was welcome to sit at their table (which included lots of convincing, bombs, bats, and a giant cheesecake), they had very philosophical discussions:

"Why did the chicken cross the road?"

They were sitting at the lunch table in the back of the lunch room, Tsuna and Yamamoto eating their lunch, Chrome fretting over her missing eye-patch, Fran reading a book, and Gokudera trying to find other places where he could stash more of his bombs.

Fran looked up from his book. "That was random," he stated blankly.

Gokudera sighed. "I really want to know."

Tsuna put down his sandwich. "I really _don't_ know..."

Chrome covered her eye with one hand. "It's one of those 'it's either a very deep answer or very stupid answer' questions," she whispered.

Yamamoto nodded. "I guess one could see it as a person who is scared of something gets over his or her," he said, looking over at Chrome. "own fear to move from one point in their life to another. You know, you could even go deeper with this."

Gokudera jumped in. "Yeah, like that the chicken is you, the road is life, and what lies across the street is what your destiny is."

Tsuna and Chrome smiled at him. "That seems to make perfect sense!"

Gokudera blushed. "Ah, Tenth," he stated.

"The only reason the chicken crossed the road was because it was an idiot and was being stupid."

All of them turned to stare at Fran. "Huh? Why do you say that?"

Fran sighed and closed the book. "I say that because it's true."

"And what makes it true?"

"It's true because I say it is. QED."

…

Yes, they all had deep and meaningful conversations.

They also had very fun parties, and since Fran was _such_ a party enthusiast, they had no trouble getting him to go to the parties:

"Why not?"

"I don't like people."

"You hang out with us."

"I'm forced."

"Com on! It's going to be great! They have a pool in their backyard (that's rare in this part of town), and lots of food."

"No."

"Fran!"

"Go away."

"Why won't you go?"

"It's just an excuse to go, get drunk, make out with random people, maybe have sex, and cause damage to the house and scar the neighbors for life."

"...not _all_ parties are like that..."

"..."

"If you just came to this one, you would see!"

"Go on, honey!"

"Mom?"

"It'll be great!"

"..."

"Don't you look at your mother with no emotion! Do as you're told, or I'll ground you!"

"Man, you just got told by your _mom_."

Laughing.

"Young man, if you don't stop laughing I will ground you too."

Sudden stop of said laughing. "Yes, ma'am."

"Fine... I'll go."

...

And they also never had trouble getting him to come over for movie night Friday:

"Why not?"

"Because I don't like people. Have you _not_ been listening every other two hundred and thirty two times I've mentioned that?"

"...Do we need to get your mom?"

"...Fine."

...so, there had been a _few_ rough times, but it had all been worth it. Fran was really a great person, and had been a rock while they had been in college. Tsuna didn't know what he would have done without him. But now...

Now, Tsuna didn't know what to do _to_ him.

He blinked down at his phone. _Should I just call and say I don't want to do the apprenticeship? Will he understand?_

Gulping, he summoned up his courage. He could do this. He quickly dialed the number and waited...and waited...and waited...and wait...ed...

Oh, who was he kidding? He couldn't do this! _I should just hang up before he-_

"_Hello?"_

_Hiii!_

"_Hello? ...Damn brats."_

Trying to summon up his courage (again), Tsuna spoke. "H-hello? Murkuro?"

"_...this is?"_

"Tsuna. Tsunayoshi Sawada?"

"_Are you confused as to what your name is?"_

"N-no?"

"_You're...little one's friend, aren't you? The one who is doing my...apprenticeship program."_

_Little one? Who's little one? _"Uh, sure?"

The man on the other line laughed. Tsuna held back a gulp. "_You don't want to do my program, do you?"_

"No...I'm sorry!"

"_If you don't want to, then get a signature from the one who recommended you to me. Then I will annul your contract."_

_Okay, I can do tha-_

"What contract!"

"_I filled it out with my little one two days ago. He even gave me permission to forge your signature."_

Tsuna nearly dropped the phone. He could almost feel Murkuro smirk on the other line.

"_Kufufu... Get it to me within the month, or you're stuck with me."_

And Tsuna was still holding onto the phone when Gokudera walked into the room ten minutes later. "What are you doing? Are you _trying_ to ruin your phone? Because if you are," he pulled out some bombs. "I know a_ much_ better way to do it."

Tsuna shook his head. "I need to buy a plane ticket."

Gokudera, who was looking at Tsuna's phone in an odd way, lowered his bombs slightly. "You just got back from Argentina an hour ago. Where do you need to go now?"

"Italy."

"Huh?"

"More importantly, I need to go to Lecce."

Gokudera put his bombs away. "Bel's kingdom? Why?"

"I need to make peace with someone who has my life in the palm of his hands."

Gokudera sighed. "You knew that he would find out soon enough that we were in on the whole 'new discovery at the dig site' plan," he said, sitting down in Fran's empty chair. "He set you up with that teacher of his, didn't he?"

Tsuna didn't pay attention; he was busy grabbing his coat and car keys. "I'll need to talk to you later, Gokudera. I need to go and pack!"

And with that he rushed out of the room, determined to get out of this problem as soon as possible.

[][][][][]

"_Hey, Froggy. What do you think about me killing you?"_

"_I think it would be a waste of your time."_

"_And why do you think that?"_

"_Because I really don't want to talk to you right now, so I'm saying anything that will get you to leave me alone."_

"_Ushishishi. Then say you love me."_

…

"_What?"_

"_Say you love the Prince."  
_

"_..."_

_A sharp knife suddenly appeared near his eye. "Say it."_

"_Alright! Fine! I love the Prince."_

"_Ushishi. What prince?"_

Dear god... _"I love you, Bel-senpai. There, happy now?"_

"_Ushishishi. Very."_

When Fran opened his eyes, the first thing he saw was green. Green and brown. Confused, he pushed himself up to a sitting position and took a good look around.

_Well, I'm most certainly not in Kansas anymore..._

He was in a forest, or a jungle. There were high trees surrounding him, all of them reaching up to the heavens. The ground beneath him was moist, as though it had rained recently. _It did rain last night... _There were many flowers surrounding him, most of them blue and red, and all of them smelling sweet.

He stared at the flowers, a tiny, almost invisible smile on his face. _These look like the flowers my mom used to grow in our back yard._

It took him a while to realize that he was all alone.

"Bel-senpai?"

He didn't get an answer.

The air around him grew cold suddenly, and a sense of foreboding fell upon him. _I don't like this..._ He stood up, remembering what Oz had said before he'd passed out.

"_This jungle is very dangerous, who knows what could jump out at you at any moment. That is where the test begins."_

A bush in front of him began to sway, and an angry growling sound pushed itself through the leaves. Fran stared at it, his eyes wide. When the growling became louder, Fran took that as he cue:

He turned and bolted, just as a lion came bursting through and into the clearing.

_A lion! A freakin' lion!_

Hoping his legs would keep up with him, he pushed through a bush and continued running. He could hear the lion running after him, if the angry roaring was anything to go by. _Please...please no._ He tried to concentrate on the ground in front of him: left foot, right foot, left foot, right foot, left foot, right, left, right, left-

His right foot caught on a root that had risen up from the ground and he was sent tumbling to the ground. Groaning, he gripped his knee and rolled to his side. A low growling sound caught his attention and he looked up-

-and looked right into the lion's eyes.

The lion breathed heavily, and even a few feet away Fran could feel the heat coming from that single breath. His face went pale.

_Please..._

The lion pulled its head back slightly, before letting loose a loud roar that rattled Fran's teeth and lunging forward.

_I'm sorry...Bel.  
_

_

* * *

_And there it is! Now, I did a little research, and picked one of the smallest places in Italy I found for Bel's homeland.

Now, if you do not review, the lion will eat Fran, Bel will become emotionally unstable (even more than he already is) and Raseil will kill his brother with a blender.

...yeah -nods to self-

So, review! Review and save the stars!

Lots of love,

UO


	4. Welcome to the Jungle

Hey there!

So, before this next chapter begins, there are a few things I need to address:

**First:_ GLOMP!_** I need to thank everyone who reviewed and/or read this story! Thank you sooo much! I love everyone of you!

**Second: **I'm sorry that this update took a while; I found out a friend of mine died, and it got hard to write. So, I'm sorry if it seems that this chapter is lacking a little in the humor section. I had to rewrite a lot of it, because it came out very angsty and depressing; the majority of this is a rewrite, so...yeah.

**Third:** I'm going to be starting college soon (I'm majoring in music education -sighs-), and so updates will take longer to come. I'm sorry. I hope to get one more chapter up before college, but I can't promise anything... Forgive me?

**Fourth: **The typical: read and review.

**DISCLAIMER: **I do not own. I did not make any money from this. I just made my laptop hate me.

-here we go!-

* * *

The day Bel realized that he was in love with Fran was a Tuesday.

Half of the realization came during his grammar class, somewhere in between his teacher ranting about the need for semi-colons (Bel always zoned out during this part because really, he was a prince and therefore was wealthy and didn't truly _need_ an education), and throwing a piece of chalk at a student who had been texting her boyfriend and laughing loudly at his messages. He had looked out the window and had automatically began his favorite pastime:

Frog Hunting.

He knew that Fran had his physical education class while Bel was in grammar and, luckily for Bel, the coach that Fran had made them use the field that Bel was able to see perfectly outside of his classroom window. The PE class was currently playing baseball, and Bel scanned the field, looking for the green hair-

_Ah, found him!_

Fran was the only one sitting out; he was laying on the grass, holding a book up in front of his face to block out the sun. From where he was sitting, Bel could make out the ACE bandage wrap around Fran's left foot. He mentally winced. He'd given Fran that injury during lunch, when the latter had tipped his juice on Bel's crown. No one touched Bel's crown without getting hurt.

He paused slightly, and bit one of his fingers hard enough to draw blood. Had he _mentally winced_ when he'd remembered giving Fran that injury to his foot?

He did a quick flashback to seven seconds ago:

Yes, he'd mentally winced.

Damn.

That had never happened before.

_Huh...this is a new development in my life. I should reward myself by hurting someone. _And so, to reward himself for maturing, if only just a little bit, he picked up his pencil and tossed it at the person sitting in front of him. The boy yelled out as the pencil stuck in his shoulder. The teacher stopped her rant and looked up. "Belphegor!"

He snickered. Detention was worth it.

He glanced back out the window to see Fran getting up off of the grass, book in hand, and reaching for his crutches. He placed the book under his chin and began to make his way back into the school. Since he was injured, he was allowed to leave class early to make it in time to his next class. Bel had been surprised that Fran hadn't told the principal who'd hurt him.

That was another thing that Bel was curious about. Neither one of them told on the other. Bel didn't tell because he was a prince, and prince's don't have others deal with their issues; they get rid of them themselves. Fran, he just didn't tell anyone anything. He rarely ever talked. Nor did he show emotions. Bel snickered; the frog always had a blank face.

And a very witty comeback.

Bel liked his witty comebacks.

It brightened up his day.

It brightened his day, like killing brightened up his day.

Bel liked killing.

And since he was a prince, he got away with it.

He liked that too.

As he walked out of class thirty minutes later, he had to wonder about that single mental wince. He never felt even the tiniest bit of remorse for hurting someone. Ever. So why had he mentally winced when he'd seen the Frog with an injury? An injury _he'd _given him! It was all so odd. _I think I just need to eat something. I didn't have breakfast this morning. Why didn't I have breakfast this morning?_

Bel did a quick flashback to four hours previous:

"_Dear god, get away from me! Don't stab me! Don't hurt-"_

Stab.

"_Ughh...you're going to get put in jail for-"_

Stab.

_The person who was being stabbed died. _

Bel snickered.

Oh yeah, that was why.

He snickered, and began to make his way to math class, secretly looking forward to this period; the Frog was in this period. That meant that he would have some fun! Bel liked having fun. He much preferred bloody fun, but he couldn't get away with that in a public school. There were way too many potential witnesses, and Bel couldn't wipe out _another_ school; his mother would never allow it. Maybe later, in a very dark alley way...

Bel paused in the hallway; two people ran into him. They ran away screaming. Prince the Ripper laughed. Yes, latter in a dark alley way.

That would do.

The Frog was already sitting in his seat, nose still in the book when Bel walked in. Bel 'hmm'ed as he walked over to his own seat and sat down, still staring at the Frog. Fran reached up and pushed a stand of hair behind his ear, exposing the small ear lobe. Bel felt the sudden urge to bite it. He wondered if he could get Fran to cry out that way.

It really irked him that Fran didn't cry out in pain (like every other person that Bel attacked did) when Bel stabbed him, or did anything else that would normally make a person cry out. He really wanted to hear that sound; he wondered if it would be high pitched (he'd almost mistaken the Frog for a girl when he'd first seen him), or if it would be a slow and drawn out, middle ranged moan.

Bel shivered in excitement. How he would have loved to hear that.

The green-haired boy was different. Maybe that was what drew Bel to him. The boy never attracted any other attention from anyone; as far as Bel knew, the Frog didn't have any friends and he worked at a family restaurant part time as a waiter when he wasn't at school. The restaurant Fran worked at was a cute (the creepy kind of cute. The kind of cute that Bel usually stayed away from) little place that had the waiters and waitresses dashing around in roller-skates to give out the food. The uniform was white and black, and Bel had originally hated that uniform, but seeing it on Fran made it seem tolerable. Fran worked there on Tuesdays, Wednesdays, and every weekend day. He didn't make that good of tips on Tuesdays, but he well made up for it on the weekends, when his tips would double in amount if the lunch rush was particularly good. Oh, yes. Bel knew his Frog. He'd done his Fran-homework well. He'd even given himself an A in Francanomics. He had to know Fran's schedule so that he could torture the Froggy.

He ignored his friends' comments that it was more like stalking than torture.

It confused him that he went well out of his way to annoy the Frog. He never did this to anyone else that he annoyed. But like he'd thought fifteen seconds ago, Fran was different. And different was different in Bel's books.

_...that didn't really make any sense..._

Different was good in Bel's books.

_Much better. _

Their math teacher walked in, slapping his books down onto the table, earning the classes attention from that single action. He glared at the students. Some of the students shivered. "No more talking. It's time for your end of term test."

The class groaned (except for Fran, who didn't express emotions, and Bel, who was smart and had no reason to groan) and simultaneously slouched in their seats.

Over across the room, Bel saw Fran mark his place in his book, _In Search of the Neanderthals, _by Christopher Stringer (Bel could see the book title because he had good eyes. He had good eyes because he was a prince. Ushishishi.), and pull out a pencil. He immediately began to chew on the pencil body as the math test was placed in front of him. It was a little quirk that Bel noticed Fran had. The boy was normally calm and collected (when he wasn't verbally assaulting people; like Bel), but when he was given a test, he became a mess.

Bel turned his gaze away as the test was placed in front of him:

_Problem one: Find two non negative numbers whose sum is 9 and so that the product of one number and the square of the other number is a maximum. (__./~__)_

Bel snickered. Math was easy. He glanced back up at the Frog; he was chewing on a new pencil now, the other one sitting on the corner of the desk, thoroughly chewed. Bel suddenly wondered what it would be like to have Fran chewing on _him._

_What. The. Fuck._

Bel faced the front of the room, his mouth turned into a huge frown on his face. That one, single thought had been disturbing. It wasn't disturbing because he had wondered what it would be like to have the _Frog_ chewing on _him,_ but it was disturbing because he _really_ wanted to know what it would feel like.

He really needed lunch.

Or he really needed to kill someone.

He'd take either at the moment.

But he would prefer to kill someone. As stated before, he liked killing.

Ushishishi.

He finished his math test in record time, trying to work out this mystery of why he wanted Fran to chew on him. It was kinky? No... Well, yes it was kinky, but that wasn't the reason... It could draw blood? It could draw blood, but Bel knew so many _better_ ways to make his blood come out. He sighed and placed his arms folded on his desk, letting his head drop onto them. His surrogate mother, Lussuria, could help out in a time like this. He flipped out his phone, ignoring the evil glare his teacher shot at him (he couldn't do anything. Bel was royalty. You don't take a phone away from _royalty, _unless he wanted to pay dearly), and quickly typed a text message to Lussuria:

_-I need help.-_

The reply was quick in coming:

-_With what?-_

_-I may be sick.-_

_-Oh no...do you have a temperature? Are you hallucinating? Are you thinking odd things? This is bad. This is really bad. You're mother is going to kill me!-_

_-I am thinking odd things...-_

_-Like what?-_

Bel hesitated here. If he told Lussuria what was going on, he could have been taking a dive into the deep end. Luss could get scary when he was in full blown 'Love' Mode. But if he didn't...

_-I felt bad for hurting the Frog (_Lussuria knew who he was referring to. The Frog was very popular in Bel's kingdom)_, and then I wondered what it would be like to have him chew on me.-_

It took a little while for Lussuria to respond. _-Are you in math class?-_

_-Yes.-_

_-Look over at him and describe him for me.-_

_-Why?-_

_-You'll see!-_

Bel sighed, but did as Lussuria said.

_-He's reading his book again, and there are three chewed pencils on his desk. He's still as froggy as ever, with his green hair and eyes. Those little purple tattoo marks under his eyes are still there, and he's playing with a strand of hair.-_

_-Go on.-_

_-He's a frog. What more can I describe?-_

_-Just try.-_

Bel sighed again.

_-His hair, still green and frog-ish, is shorter today. He must have gotten a hair cut over the weekend. It's sad. I liked his hair long. It looks shinier, too. Like he's using a new shampoo. His eyes...they're...kind of warm. Wish he'd look at me like he is that book, with the warm eyes. His lips are pink. Bright pink. I bet they are soft, too. Wonder what they feel like.-_

_-Bel, honey. I think you like him.-_

It was such an odd reply that Bel stared at it for a minute, completely missing out when Fran got up and left the classroom.

_-I'm a prince. I don't like Frogs.-_

_-You like this one. Look back at what you wrote to me.-_

So he did.

_Huh..._

-_Try this; talk to him.-_

_-What?-_

_-Just try it. Then tell me what you think.-_

If it got rid of his odd thoughts then he would do anything. He had one other class with the Frog: chemistry. That was after lunch. He could wait that long.

[][][][][][]

By the time lunch rolled around, Bel couldn't wait any longer. He'd had very strange thoughts about him and the Frog (one that involved ice cream and hot fudge, which made him think, _the fuck?)_, and he needed to stop this now! At the moment, he had a very dark aura surrounding him as he made his way to the library, which was where Fran was.

Fran was predictable in his schedule.

And Bel knew his schedule by heart.

No, he _wasn't _a stalker!

The door to the library hit the wall with a _bang; _one that everyone one ignored when they saw who had opened the door. Everyone knew to not bug Bel when he was surrounding himself with an evil aura. It would only bring harm.

And pain. Lots of pain.

Plus lots of hospital bills that no one wanted to pay.

Fran was sitting at an empty table, three books by him and one in his hands. Bel sauntered over to him.

"Hey, Froggy. What do you think about me killing you?"

Fran looked up, his face completely void of all emotion.

"I think it would be a waste of your time."

Bel cocked his head to the side, small smirk in place. "And why do you think that?"

Fran went back to looking at his book; Bel slammed his hand down on the book, effectively closing it...

And smashing Fran's hand in the cover at the same time. The Frog gave a slight wince.

Not at all what Bel wanted. He wanted a scream, dammit!

"Because I really don't want to talk to you right now, so I'm saying anything that will get you to leave me alone."

"Ushishishi. Then say you love me."

Both boys paused. Bel frowned. That hadn't been what he'd wanted to say but...

Oh well. He'd learned that sometimes one needed to roll with things.

"What?"

"Say you love the Prince."

"..."

Bel wiped out a knife and placed it near Fran's eye. That would spring the Frog into action. "Say it."

"Alright! Fine! I love the Prince."

Bel snickered. "Ushishi. What prince?" If Fran was referring to his _older, much more uglier, and much more stupider _twin brother, there was going to be some _major_ issues that would need to be fixed.

"I love you, Bel-senpai. There, happy now?"

Bel tried not to smile, but a tiny, _real_ smile appeared on his face. Hearing Fran say that...for some odd reason, it made his heart feel lighter.

_I have a heart. Wow. You learn something new everyday._

Bel pulled the knife back and patted Fran on the head. "Good Frog," he said as he turned and left he library, his aura now a happy I-Feel-Like-Kiling-Someone happy.

That was when the second part of the realization came to him:

He didn't like Fran.

He was in love with Fran.

And since he was a prince, he got what he wanted.

He wanted Fran.

He snickered and left the school building, completely ignoring the fact that the school day was only half over.

He had some plotting to do.

[][][][][]

It had taken him two years, six months, thirteen days, forty-seven hours and fifty-two minutes for him to come up with his ingenious plan:

He would have Fran perform his land's ancient wedding dance with him.

Then, he and Fran would be married, and Bel would have his Frog.

His family was all for it (except for his brother, but Bel didn't consider him family anyway. Rasiel was more of an _it_ than family anyway.), his mother gripping him in a tight hug and saying that she would do whatever it was so Bel could have his 'love'. His father gave him an appreciative nod. Rasiel tried to kill him.

Bel tried to kill him back, so all-in-all it was fair.

He knew from a few contacts (Fran's boss, and Fran's good friend, Tsunayoshi Sawada. Bel had gotten him involved a year previous. Tsuna had been the one to tell him that Fran wasn't in a relationship and hadn't been in one...ever.) that Fran was involved in archeology, and that he was a very good archeologist.

So, Bel opened up an old archeologist site that had been closed for a long time. There were lots of artifacts that could be found in that specific area, and he knew that it would get Fran's attention.

It had.

So, after he'd performed the wedding dance with his Frog, Bel let him go to settle his life. A year later, he'd sent for him.

And now...

_Goddamn jungle with its trees and animals!_

Now they were separated.

On completely different sides of the jungle.

_This is just peachy. I wasn't told that we were going to be separated! As Prince the Ripper, I don't approve!_

After Fran had passed out, Bel had had to drink something that eventually made him lose consciousness. He had been asleep for, what he assumed to be, four hours. When he'd woken up, he was on the ground, in the jungle, and Frog-less.

The Frog-less part was what _really_ made him depressed.

Patting his clothes, he located all of his knives, feeling more secure with them on his person. Once he was sure that all of his knives were in their correct place and that none of them were missing, he pulled out a scrap of cloth out of his pocket; it was a piece of Fran's shirt that he'd secretly ripped off before drinking the Pass-Out drink. He tied it around his arm and began to make his way through the jungle. He was pissed. He wanted his Fran back by his side.

One hour, seven dead mice, two dead snakes, and a dead lion later, Bel was beyond pissed.

He hadn't found his frog yet.

He squatted down low on the ground, sighing. _If I go straight, it'll lead me to that giant man-eating plant that ate Rasiel's partner...so if I go right..._

A bush behind him began to wiggle, and he turned around sharply, knife in hand. He and the bush proceeded to have a staring contest.

…

…

…

…

The bush lost;

A small mink jumped out of the bush, the creature staring at Bel intently. Bel stared back at it.

…

…

…

…

The mink lost.

It walked over to Bel and climbed up on his knee. Bel leaned down to glare at it more intensely. The mink licked his nose, causing Bel to snicker.

"You're odd," he told the mink.

The mink, being an animal, didn't respond back. Instead, it began to sniff the piece of cloth wrapped around Bel's arm. After sniffing, it stared at the cloth for a second before it hopped off of Bel's knee and began to run around in a circle.

Because Bel could speak Mink, he knew what it was trying to say.

"Ushishishi. You know where the Prince's Frog is?"

The mink stopped running in a circle to stare at him, before it nodded (this mink was intelligent) and took off into the jungle. Bel followed it, because he was thinking logically: follow the mink.

Bel wasn't really good at thinking logically.

[][][][][]

Fran wasn't a lion tamer. He'd never wanted to be a lion tamer. Even when he'd been ten and had run away and joined the circus (it had been his rebellious stage, and he'd been ten. You can forgive him), he'd never wanted to be a lion tamer (he'd chosen the high wire and learned how to be an acrobat. He was very flexible now).

Now, he was wishing he'd been a lion tamer those two years he'd been involved in the circus.

The lion growled at him and lunged; Fran rolled to the side, avoiding the lion's large and clawed paw. _Note to self: don't visit the lion part of the zoo. Ever again. If you manage to get out of this alive!_

Gasping, he stood up and began to run. The lion growled and gave chase. As he was running for his life, Fran decided to have his life flash before his eyes:

_He'd been born in a small cottage at the edge of a cliff-_

...never mind. That would take way too much concentration. He needed to concentrate on running.

He hopped over a fallen tree log and turned to the right, jumping out of a rather large bush. He could make it, he could outrun this lion. He could-

Fran stopped running, staring at what he was looking at; a cliff.

-He could run right into a dead end, with a hungry lion right behind him.

_Way to go Fran. You're a genius. I hate you, Bel-senpai._

For some odd reason, that made him feel a lot better than it should have.

Gulping, he turned and faced the other end, the lion staring at him. He and the lion stared at each other intently.

…

…

…

…

Fran lost. _Oh, well. At least I have some closure on life. Mine was pathetic. End of story._

He paused.

_That isn't closure! Forget dying! I want to live, goddammit!_

He blinked. This was new. He _actually_ wanted to live. Maybe being married to Bel was doing some good to him.

Over on the other edge of the cliff in the Jungle of Death that was part of an insane challenge that was supposed to test the 'love' between him and Bel the Ripper, the lion roared, as if saying 'hey! I'm still here and I'm going to eat you! This is all your husband's fault!'

Fran suddenly found himself very depressed. He fell to the ground and sighed, looking up at the lion. "Go ahead," he muttered. "Eat me."

The lion stopped growling and cocked his head to the side. This was something new. His meals usually died crying and screaming. This one was actually sitting down and emitting an evil aura. The lion sat down too, thinking. There was something wrong with his food. He decided to find out what. Standing up, the lion walked over to the green-haired man and sat down beside him. He licked his arm, asking what was wrong.

Fran groaned. "I'm married to Prince the Ripper, that's what's wrong."

The lion grunted. He'd heard of this Prince the Ripper (the animal gossip chain was _huge_). He rather admired him. He nudged Fran's arm.

_Go on._

Fran took a deep breath. "I came here because I was told that the dig site had been opened again and had found some artifacts but I soon found out that the real reason that I was here was because I was married to my high school bully because I, apparently, performed some sort of wedding dance- I don't know- and that he wanted to live a 'married life' or something weird. So now, because I came here and found out that I was married to Prince the Ripper, I call him Bel-senpai, I'm stuck in this jungle for a month, separated from the one person who could help me, and I'm _talking_ to a _lion_. Fran. What is wrong with you."

The lion huffed, as if to say 'I'm a good listener. You can keep talking if you want. So what if I'm a lion?'

Fran let his body lie on the ground, staring up at the sky; it was getting darker, and the air was growing cold. He didn't really care anymore; the lion could eat him. He let his eyes slip closed.

[][][][]

"Froggy."

Fran groaned, moving closer to the warmth that was a little bit...to his...right.

_There we go..._

"Froggy..."

Fran turned again, trying to cover up the noise.

"Frog!"

Fran sighed. _Go away, Bel-senpai..._

_Stab._

Fran's eyes shot open.

It was morning, and he was not dead.

He was happy about that.

He looked straight and saw Bel standing slightly behind a tree, holding three knives in his hand. Sighing, he reached up and pulled the knife out of his upper harm. "Morning, sen-"

He was going to continue, but hot breath on his face made him stop. He froze, looking up to see-

The lion was practically laying on top of him and was breathing on his face. _He needs a breath mint. I mean, really._

Fran turned back to Bel, who was motioning towards him. "Come here," he said.

Fran nodded, and began to slip out from underneath the lion's arm. He made it out without the lion waking, and practically ran to Bel, happier to see him now then he'd ever been. Bel gripped him in a tight hug when he reached him. "Ushishi," he whispered. "The Prince found his frog."

Fran nodded, gripping Bel's jacket, trying hard to come to terms with the fact that he'd just spent the night with a lion.

It was all rather disturbing.

Bel rubbed his back. "Ushishishi. Let's get out of this clearing," he said as he turned Fran around. As he did so, he tossed one of his knives at the cliff. "Run," he snickered, before taking off.

Fran, feeling that he _really_ needed to trust his...husband, took off after him.

Five seconds later, there was an explosion

The blast sent Fran flying forward, into Bel; both of them crashed into the ground, Bel on top of Fran. Fran winced slightly, putting a hand to his sore back. That was going to hurt the next morning. "Senpai? What did you do?"

The only answer he got was a kiss on the corner of his mouth and an 'ushishishi'. Bel tightened his grip and placed his head on top of Fran's head. "Stupid Frog."

Fran blinked, inside frowning a great deal. _For someone who everyone claims _cares for_ me, he has a really awful way of showing it... 'Stupid Frog', what is that? A term of endearment? I mean, most people, when in relationships, say things like 'honey', 'dear,' 'darling', hell, even 'baby'! But 'stupid Frog'? What did I get myself into? Why am I doing this again? Here, in this freakin' forest? _

Bel snickered again, taking one of Fran's ear in his hand and yanking on it. "Froggy should have turned right when running from the lion. It would have led you straight to the Prince. Ushishi."

Fran tried to pull away; Bel's grip on him prevented him from, however. "Were you...watching me?"

Bel laughed, rather loudly. "The Prince has been watching you since you met the lion!"

Fran punched him. "Ass," he muttered as he pulled away, this time escaping Bel's grasp. His 'husband' laughed maniacally.

"It was fun; the Prince has never seen a frog run that fast before. I haven't ever seen a frog run..." He cocked his head to the side, making a 'hmmm' sound. "It was rather interesting to see..."

Fran blinked. "I _really_ don't like you, you know."

Bel placed a single kiss on his forehead; Fran didn't try to stop him. "Ushishi. You love this Prince. You said so yourself."

Fran didn't even try to respond.

[][][][][][]

Tsuna wasn't expecting anyone to meet him when he got off the plane, but there was someone: Enma. He stopped walking, luggage still in hand, and stared. _I didn't tell anyone that I was going to be arriving...what's he doing here? _He continued to stare, until the next question came up. _Why is he covered in bruises?_

Enma was waving at him, a tiny smile on his face, his eyes bright. "Tsuna," he called. "Over here!"

Shrugging, Tsuna began to walk over to him, dragging his luggage all the way. "Hi," he said, putting his luggage beside him and looking Enma in the eye. "How are you doing?"

Enma tried to smile, but a bruise high on his cheek made him wince. "I'm f-fine. How are you doing?"

Tsuna reached up a hesitant hand to brush Enma's bruise. "I'm fine, but what happened to you?"

Enma shrugged. "N-nothing," he said, reaching down and grabbing one of Tsuna's bags. "I was told by the king to come and pick you up to escort you to the castle."

Tsuna blinked. _Hii?_ "P-pick me up? But how did you know that I was coming?"

Enma began walking towards the air-port exit. "We monitor everyone who comes into our land. When word that you were coming reached the castle, the king and queen decided to have you room in the castle."

Tsuna stared at him and stopped walking. "Huh?"

Enma turned back to him. "Are you coming?"

Shaking his head, Tsuna walked to him. "Yeah..."

_This land is weird!_

They were ushered into a limo when they walked out of the air-port. While sitting in the car, Enma filled him in. "We have made a room for you, with books and a connecting bathroom. We hope it is to your liking."

Tsuna sighed. "I'm perfectly fine to sleep in a hotel."

Enma shook his head. "No, you are a friend of Bel's frog, so therefore, you are to stay in the castle."

Tsuna decided to not fight with it. Instead, he turned his attention to Enma's bruises. "So, what happened here?"

Enma turned his head and ducked it slightly. "No-nothing..."

"Something did. You didn't fall down the stairs did you? And don't say that is exactly what you did; I've used that excuse many times."

The other sighed. "I get beat up by some of the guards when they are bored."

Tsuna gasped. "That's not right! You should report them!"

The other slumped down in his seat. "I'm not that kind of guy..." he stated glumly. "So," he said, trying to look more enthusiastic. He failed. "What are you doing here?"

Tsuna flinched, remembering his 'apprenticeship'. "I need to speak to Fran immediately."

Enma made a sound that could only be described as 'eeayummmm'. Tsuna felt an overwhelming sense of doom come over him. "W-what?"

Enma grimaced. "Fran is...unavailable at the moment..."

"Well, when will he be? Available?"

Enma seemed to shrink back into his seat more. "...not til a month..." he whispered, in a very tiny voice.

Tsuna's sense of Doom grew. "I- I'm sorry?"

"Not until a month is up..."

And Tsuna died.

Not really.

But he wished he had.

_My life is now officially over..._

[][][][][][][]

"Senpai, where are we going?"

Bel ignored him, only letting an 'ushishishi' answer for him. He sighed inside. Really.

They had been walking for almost-

Well, Fran had lost count of the time, so...

They had been walking for a _very_ long time, and Fran, at this point in time, was unable to feel his feet. In his experience, that was a bad sign. He looked up at the sky, the dark clouds and persistent rumbling not sounding very promising. He looked back at Bel, who was walking ahead, not once stopping to see if Fran was still with him. He wondered if Bel would even notice if he dropped down to the ground and died right there.

Probably not.

Bel suddenly stopped, causing Fran to run into him. "Senpai-"

"Ushishi. We're here."

Fran peaked around Bel's body to see a worn down, very small cottage. The roof was intact, but a few boards looked like they were ready to fall apart at any moment; there were three windows on the cottage, two of them still intact, but one was completely gone; the porch was tilted, and a few of the boards had fallen in.

Fran blinked. "It's beautiful," he said in mono-tone. "I love it. You have really outdone yourself, senpai."

Bel snickered. "I did, didn't I?"

Fran sighed. Sarcasm was really lost on his senpai.

Bel pulled him into the cottage, which, inside, was surprisingly warm and cozy. Bel smirked. "The Prince had this made sixteen years ago; I played in this jungle as a kid."

For some reason, this didn't surprise Fran at all.

"It has a kitchen, and two bedrooms, a working bathroom, and a living room. And it's furnished! We will stay here for the test."

Fran tilted his head to the left. "Your brother doesn't know about this place, does he?"

Bel laughed. "Nope!"

"I thought so..."

Bel walked into the next room (the living room) and sat down on a worn, brown couch. "There is a stable with two horses a mile away, too. The Prince had them put there three days ago. The Prince thought of everything." He smiled, looking very smug.

"What are did you plan for food?"

Bel didn't answer.

"Senpai?"

Bel didn't respond.

"You forgot to have this place packed with food, didn't you?"

"Ushishishi?"

Fran sighed and sat down next to Bel. This was going to be a very long month.

* * *

There it was! Hope you liked it! As usual, I would appreciate some critique so...review! Please!

Lots of hearts, glomps and love,

UO


	5. Butnugget

Hi!

(looks up at the single word, 'hi') ...Sorry, that was kind of lame. Let me try again:

Hello people of planet Earth!

(there, that was better!)

Ugh, sorry this is later than I had hoped that it would be. It's hard to switch from an angsty, drama-filled story (Illusione Orale) to a humorous one. But, I did it! Whoo! -is proud of self- And!

-drumroll- I got through my first week of college! Party! -cough cough-

Well, enough with me. Let's get down to business:

**First:** Thanks to all of those who reviewed; I love you guys! And also, thanks to everyone who read (and/or is reading it) this story. I'm glad that it interests you.

**Second:** Don't forget the r's, to review to save the stars, and to not run into parked cars! -ooh, look. I made a rhyme-

**Third:** Disclaimer: Me no own. I are win at grammar. Whatever. I do, however, own the story about the Bel.

Before I let you continue reading on, there is one thing that I have to say:

Mukuro, Mukuro, Mukuro, Mukuro, Mukuro, Mukuro, Mukuro Mukuro, Mukuro, Mukuro, Mukuro, Mukuro, Mukuro, Mukuro, Mukuro, Mukuro, Mukuro, Mukuro, Mukuro, Mukuro, Mukuro, Mukuro, Mukuro, Mukuro, Mukuro! As you can tell, Mukuro is in this chapter! Whee!

:D

And here we go!

* * *

Fran hated his husband at the moment.

He _really_ hated his husband.

They were laying down on the only bed in the run-down 'home' that they were going to be living in for the next month. Fran, who was as close to the edge of the bed as he dared to go (the floors of the 'home' didn't look so sturdy, and he didn't feel like testing their ability to hold someone if they fell off the bed at the moment), was very close to imploding.

His husband was telling him a story.

Belphegor, the man who went around high school with the title of Prince the Ripper and beat people up for fun (and, there were even rumors that he had killed...for fun; Fran did not doubt the rumors), was telling him a story.

It was a story of how he got the title of Prince the Ripper.

It went something like this:

_Once upon a time, there was a Bel. He was a truly wonderful little boy who liked to play with sharp objects and make people bleed. He was also much, much cooler and smarter and handsomer and nicer and betterer at killing peopler and runninger and jumpinger and swimminger and telling storieser and was just a much funner person all around than his dingy, ugly, fat, useless, stupid, whiny, pathetic, corrupted, awful, lazy, no-good baby killing, disgusting, rotting, jerk faced, creepy, wimpy, stinky, atrocious, beastly, foul, abhorrent, horrid, hellish, nauseating, obnoxious, offensive, contemptible, horrendous, unsightly, ghastly, horrific, grim, vile, revolting, scandalous, scuzzy, vulgar, monstrous, detestable, repugnant-_

_(many, many, _many_ insulting names later)_

_-and very much dead, older twin brother. One day, after having killed his big brother (finally) and the rest of his family, the genius was bored and decided to kill something else. And so when he happened upon a man stealing money from his castle, he killed him and ripped his arms and legs off._

_And he was forever known as Prince the Ripper. _

_And everyone died the end._

_Except for the Bel._

_The real end._

Now, since his brother was very much still alive (unless Rasiel was just a mechanical doll- Fran very much doubted that theory), along with his parents, Fran could only blink at the story and mentally call his _husband_ a liar and many other colorful names. He had told hold in his urge to do a Bel and kill the human being next to him when Bel opened his mouth and started singing.

_Can I consider him human? I mean, it would be much easier if I buried him in the ground at a dig site and claimed that he was a walking sociopath... I could get away with murder then...possibly. _Fran glanced over at his singing senpai- who was singing off key and as loud as he could. _I think that my eardrums just died._

Bel suddenly let out a loud, screeching note.

_Yes, my eardrums just died._

_Along with a part of my soul._

_...Wow. I have a soul. That's something I never knew I had. You really do learn something new each day._

There was a sudden shift on the bed and Fran felt an arm drape over his shoulders. "Bel-senpai-"

"Ushishishi-"

Fran sighed. Bel was just laughing.

"-shishishishishishishishishi-

…

"-shishishishishishishishi-"

…...

"-shishishishishishishishishi-"

What, in all of the seven circles of _hell, _was so funny?

"Sen-"

"-shishishishishishi-"

Fran frowned. "Sen-"

"-shishishishishishishi-"

Taking a deep breath, Fran sat up and leaned over Bel. "Senpai!"

Bel stopped laughing and stared up at him. "Hmm?"

"What's so funny?"

Bel just added another snicker to the air. Fran leaned closer to his senpai and stared at him, eyes blinking rapidly. Bel immediately stopped snickering and closed his mouth. Fran tilted his head to the side, trying to keep his insides from doing back-flips. He'd learned in his first year of high school that Bel was like a tyrannosaurus-rex; all you had to do was not move, then it would turn its attention away from you.

Bel huffed. "Why is Froggy looking at the Prince like that?"

Sometimes. Sometimes the T-Rex theory worked.

Fran cocked his head slightly to the left. "Senpai was sounding like he needed to be admitted to the Psych-ward. I was just trying to see if I could snap you out of your insanity. It worked, I guess," Fran said as he pulled away from Bel-

-or more like he tried to pull away.

Bel reached out and grabbed his arm, yanking Fran back onto the bed, leaving Bel to tower over him, smirk plastered on his face. "The Prince didn't say you could leave, Frog."

Fran sighed. "Senpai, this is an odd position."

Bel snickered. "No, it's not!"

"Senpai..."

"Ushishi, yes?"

"I'm bored, and you're cutting off the circulation in my wrists. Could you please stop?"

Fran began to rub the circulation back into his wrists as soon as Bel let go. "I think you must be hunrgy, senpai. You've never laughed that long before."

"Shishi. The Prince just felt like having a laughing fit."

_Well, then. Don't let me interrupt your important laughing fit. _

At that point, Bel's stomach let out a loud rumbling sound, both men looking down at said rumbling stomach. Bel let out a tiny snicker. "The Prince is hungry!"

_No duh._

"What do you suggest we get for food, senpai? We don't have a way to get real food."

"We go on a hunt."

It was said in such a straight tone that Fran took a while to ask if his husband was serious. "Hunting... We go hunting."

"Ushishishi. Yes!"

As he slumped down onto the bed, Fran had to think, once again, that he hated his life.

"The Prince is a good hunter; Froggy will learn how to hunt today."

_I hate my life...so much right now. Can I die? _Fran mentally asked, sending the plea up into the heavens. Because he didn't die a split second later, Fran lost all belief in the higher ups. _You guys suck!_

He was yanked back into reality when Bel grabbed his arm and pulled him off his bed. "Well, then. I have a plan. Let's get you ready, _Fran._"

He'd called him by his _name. _Fran really only had one thought running through his head as he was pulled out of the room and informed (and forced to perform) said plan:

_Oh, shit._

[][][][][]

_Why...why me? What did I ever do in life to deserve this? Nothing! ...except maybe annoy people and insult almost every deity that I could, but really! I did nothing!_

He was in a clearing, wearing a giant chicken suit.

He was wearing a giant chicken suit.

Why was he wearing a giant chicken suit?

_Well, it beats the frog suit he had..._

But really? Why was he wearing a _chicken suit_?

_Uh...I'm just here to clarify some things..._

"No way in hell."

"Ushishishi."

"I'm not wearing that."

"Ushishishi."

"Senpai."

"Ushishishi."

"Seriously?"

"Ushishishi."

Fran frowned on the inside. _In a few seconds you're not going to be able to laugh because I'm going to stick that knife that's in your hand down your throat, into your stomach, and then pull it out via your intestines and then do a _Sweeny Todd_ and bake you into a pie!_

_...wow... I'm picking up some of senpai's murder traits. Well, hot damn, it looks like I _do _have a __personality. _

_Cool. Never thought that I would get one of those in my lifetime. _

"If Froggy really wants food-"

"Actually, I _really_ just want you to shut up and let me go home, but that's not going to happen, is it, senpai?"

Bel smirked. "Nope!"

Fran sighed. "Fine, I'll wear the suit."

_And now that things are clarified..._

_Oh yeah. That's why. _

"Ushishi. Let me just add the final ingredient."

Fran frowned as Bel picked up something and tipped it over his head. Some kind of liquid ran down his face and he stuck out his tongue to get a taste.

It was blood.

Fran promptly spat it out and wiped his tongue with a chicken wing. A second later, he spat out a feather. "Senpai..."

Bel snickered and tossed the can he'd been holding over his shoulder.

"Is this real blood?"

"Ushishishi."

"Where did you get real blood, senpai?"

Bel ignored him and steered him away from the clearing, his grip on Fran's hand tight. Fran rolled his eyes and let himself be dragged to wherever he was being taken. It was around that time that Fran really began to analyze his options. He had three as far as he knew; option one: stab his senpai and take off, was a good one, but he rather liked his life and didn't want to die so he shoved that one aside. Option two: say that he wasn't going to have anything to do with this ridiculous plan, was another good one but...he still liked living and he shoved that one aside as well.

Option three: go with the plan.

_I'm just not getting anywhere with this, am I?_

"Senpai, I'm still not sure how this is-"

He was cut off as Bel tugged him forward sharply and planted his mouth over Fran's. _Somehow... This __seems very familiar. He kissed me right before I passed out yester-_

There was a sudden pain in the side of his neck and Fran found himself slipping into darkness.

Again.

_Hi, Darkness. How are you?_

_-I'm peachy. You?-_

_Well, I'm visiting you again..._

_-Oh, yeah. Right.-_

_You know, I really should have seen this coming._

_-I agree, you really should have.-_

And Fran passed out.

[][][][][]

He was moving when he woke up, a back and forth type movement that was confusing. When he glanced to his right, he saw trees. When he glanced to his left, he saw trees. When he looked up, he saw tree leaves and a branch. When he tried to move his arms, he found that he couldn't. When he looked at his body, he saw ropes wrapped around his body. He followed the line of the rope up and saw it tied tightly to the tree-branch.

_I'm dangling from a tree. Outstanding._

He closed his eyes and listened.

"...shishishi."

A furry Fran felt had never felt rose through his body, and in an angry rage he yelled out, "Senpai!"

Bel stepped out from behind a tree in front of him. "Hmm?" He was smirking, his teeth flashing wildly. "Need something, Froggy?"

"Let me down!"

Bel seemed to smiled even bigger, which made his face stretch wider. "Nope! Not going to happen!"

_Excuse me?_

"I need you up there; you're the bait."

_Bait...? Bait for what?_

He was going to ask, but as he opened his mouth Bel turned around and vanished behind a tree. Fran began to wriggle. "Hey, senpai! Let me go!"

There was no answer.

"Let me go, you but-nugget!"

There was no answer.

_Damn it!_

And so he was left there, swaying in the breeze, in a chicken suit, with blood dripping off of his body-

Wait...

_Blood attracts animals that eat meet. Like lions...and there are definitely lions here. Senpai said we were going to go hunting and I am _the_ biggest idiot in existence. _Fran sighed and shook his head. What he needed to focus on was getting out of the rope before-

"Roar!"

Fran's head snapped up and he gave a very long stare at the bush in front of him. "Senpai, that is really stupid and annoying."

Bel stepped out of the bush, his smile revealing teeth that every dentist would be proud of. "Just wanted to see if my Frog was jumpy."

"How can I be 'jumpy' if I'm tied and dangling from a tree?"

Bel cocked his head to the side, as if analyzing the situation. "Oh, yeah. Guess that you can't be jumpy." He stuffed his hands into his pocket and stuck out his lower lip. "That sucks. I wanted to see Froggy squirm."

Fran would have gawked at him, but that would have ruined his emotionless persona that he'd worked so hard to create. He didn't like ruining things that he'd worked hard to create, so he didn't gawk. Instead, he settled for sighing. _Jeez. He's so childish._

"You really are stupid, senpai."

There was a swishing sound and a dull _thud_ that came from the area above his head. He looked up and wasn't surprised to find a knife imbedded into the tree. Bel was snickering from his position on the ground. "Maybe I'll just have Frog for dinner."

"Wow, senpai. You must really like me. First you bully me, then you force me to marry you, then you kidnap me, and now you want to eat me," Fran stated in mono-tone. "I feel so loved right now."

"You should."

"Senpai, please let me down."

"No."

"Why?"

"It's coming."

Fran frowned on the inside. "What's coming?"

Bel just turned and hid behind the tree again.

_Pansy._

And so, he was forced to hang and dangle from a tree, in a chicken suit covered with dry blood, and wait for 'it' to come.

_Four hours later... _

_I. Hate. Him. So. Much. Right. Now._

Fran gave another wiggle to get the bird that was sitting on his head off. _I think that his is the tenth bird I've had visit me today. Why couldn't we have just eaten the birds? That would have made my life a whole lot easier. But what am I talking about? This is Bel-senpai; he was brought to this planet to make my life miserable and be the sole reason why every high school now needs to have metal detectors at all of the entrances. _

"Senpai," he called, hoping to get a response.

The sound of his voice echoing was the only response he got. "Figures," he muttered. His senpai was really like a child. He took a deep breath and called out again, "Senpai!"

There was no answer.

With yet another sigh, Fran began to try to get out of the rope. He had slipped one of his arms out of the chicken suit and was fiddling with the knot by his waist when he heard it:

_Rip._

Fran stared ahead, a look of of utter contempt on his face. It was at this moment that Bel stepped out from behind a tree. "Bel-senpai," he called. Bel looked up.

"Hmm?"

"I hate you."

And with that, the rope holding him to the tree-branch ripped and he went crashing to the ground.

Bel gave out a sigh, lumbering over to where his wife had fallen. "That was graceful, ushishishi."

Fran looked up at him with an emotionless face. "Then let's tie you up there, senpai, and see if you can do it better."

"I could do it better, because I'm a Prince."

"You're a moron."

"No, I'm a Prince."

"A stupid, fallen Prince is more like it."

"Do you _want_ to die?"

Fran sighed and stood up. "See? You're just a big bully; you'll even threaten your wife."

When he looked up, the facial expression on Bel's face was one he had never thought he would see. "S-senpai?"

Bel's mouth was hanging open, his cheeks relaxed and his arms were hanging loosely at his side. "Froggy, you just-"

"Senpai?"

"You just called yourself my wife..."

Fran blinked, then did a quick flashback to one minute previous.

_Damn. I did. _

_Oops. _

There was a single second of silence before a load roar broke it; to their right, a rather large bush was ripped in two as a black bear came bursting into the area. It came to a stop a few feet away from them, panting and growling. Its beady eyes came to rest on them, and it let loose a roar that shook Fran's teeth and made his hair stand straight up. Suddenly, the bear rose up onto its two back legs and-

"You're ruining the moment!"

-and Bel tackled the bear.

It was such a rare sight that Fran couldn't tear his eyes away from it:

Bel was wrestling a bear.

And it was awesome.

[][][][][]

Mukuro wasn't the type of person to be seen lounging on a wooden, park bench in the middle of the day. In fact, he wasn't the type of person who liked to be _seen_ in the park, on a wooden bench, in the middle of the day. He preferred to be seen at night, when it was really dark, and in an alleyway with no light or windows, wearing all black and a black hoodie covering his head-

He just wasn't the type of person who liked to be seen.

And he most certainly wasn't the type of person to be kept waiting.

On a wooden bench.

In the park.

In the middle of the day.

"Hey mommy! Look at that man with the funny pineapple hair!"

The vein on his forehead that had been pulsing for over the past hour sped up, and Mukuro found himself frowning. _Stupid kids._

Mukuro didn't like kids: they were whiny, loud, annoying little pests that demanded that their parents get them everything that they wanted with round, pudgy little cheeks that-

He just didn't like kids.

Probably because they always always compared him to a pineapple.

How he hated pineapples.

It was all his little apprentice's fault. He'd been perfectly happy with his hair style, until one day, his new apprentice walked into his life.

_Flashback_

Mukuro was considered the best archeologist known on the western coast. He was rich, powerful, good looking, smart, good at his job... The list went on. He was currently the archeology professor at the best college on the west coast, and he was paid very well for it.

With long strides (because, naturally, he was good looking, therefore he had to be tall and have long legs) he made his way to his classroom, ready to greet his students and give them all of the knowledge they would need to succeed in the world. He was an educator, and it was his _duty_ to teach those entering the harsh, cruel world of money, politics, and governmental power abuse. He was a professor, so he had to care for his students; they were the future generation, the saviors of the land, the world, even.

He reached the door and pulled it open.

"EVERYONE GET IN YOUR SEATS AND SHUT UP, YOU IDIOTS!"

...Yeah, he really didn't like his students that much...

Glaring angrily at those who were not scrambling to their desks like the bunny rabbits he'd wanted them to scramble like, he made his way over to his desk and slammed his papers onto it. "You all better have done your assignments; I feel like shit, and I don't mind if I take it out on you."

The class gulped in unison.

"Now, pull out your books, turn to chapter thirteen, and read it. Now."

The class scrambled to find chapter thirteen. Fifteen minutes later, they realized that the book didn't have a chapter thirteen, seeing as there were only twelve chapters in it. They looked up, but Mukuro was holding his head tightly in his hands and the last time someone had bothered him when he'd had a headache the kid had been put into the hospital with a sever concussion, a broken nose, fractured wrist, and a cracked femur.

But those were just rumors. How could one professor do so much damage that a femur bone would crack?

But they still didn't want to bother him.

Class went on for thirty minutes in silence before there was a knock on the door. Everyone's eyes began to jump back and forth between their professor (who was glaring at the door), and the door (how they pitied the poor soul on the other side of it.). Eventually, Mukuro answered the knock.

"Enter."

The class drew a collected breath as the door slid open.

A boy with green hair (he was kind of short. Did he really belong at the university?), a backpack, and a piece of paper in his hands stepped into the room. "Mukuro Rokudo?"

Mukuro frowned. "Who are you, why are you here, and get out."

The boy stared at their professor silently for a while. "Okay," he said, turning to leave. "Looks like you don't need an apprentice then."

There was a sudden slamming sounds as their professor slammed his hand onto the desk. "You're my new apprentice, Fran?"

The boy, Fran, turned around again. "Yes."

"Then get over here and help me; I have a splitting headache," he said, pointing to the empty chair by his desk. Then he looked back up at his class. "What are you doing? Read chapter thirteen!"

The class went back to 'reading' chapter thirteen.

With a sigh, Mukuro slumped in his seat. He'd had a pounding headache since he'd received a call telling him that the dig site that he'd gone to the previous week had gone under. Unless he could prove that the artifacts that they'd found were actually from four thousand years ago, they would not have the funding to open the site back up.

_Screw my life._

Slowly, he looked back up at his new apprentice, who was still standing by the door. _He's...small. _"What are you still doing over there, little one?"

There was a second of silence.

"Do you know that your hair looks like a pineapple?"

The entire classroom grew quiet; Mukuro was staring at his apprentice, who was staring at him, who was being stared at by the students. Fran blinked. "Can you all stop staring? It's making me feel uncomfortable," he said, his voice and face completely void of all emotion.

"Did...you just say my hair looked like a pineapple?"

The class shivered in a great big group shiver. That kid was so dead.

"Yes, because it does, and I find it rather amusing. Plus, judging from your reaction I'd say it was the perfect way to get back at you for calling me little one."

Oh yes, this kid was dead.

It was rather sad.

Mukuro's eyebrow twitched.

The class edited their decision. The kid was going to be sent to hell.

Fran sighed. "Listen, we can sit here all day and insult each other, but I really want this apprentice position, and judging from the look on your face and the way you're holding your head, you really need an apprentice."

Mukuro's eyebrow slowed down its twitching. "Fine. Get over here, little one, and begin to work. I have papers that need to be filed by tomorrow."

Fran walked over to the chair and sat down, picking up some of the papers and staring intently at them. "You really do look like a pineapple-head, though."

The next day, many of Mukuro's students dropped the class. They really didn't like seeing their professor threaten his new apprentice and chase him around the room with a trident in hand, attempting to stab him.

There were some people in the world who really needed help.

Mukuro was one of them.

_End flashback_

Oh, yes. He'd like pineapples, until he'd been compared to one, and it was all thanks to his little one.

How he hated that kid.

It was also because of his little one that he was getting a new apprentice.

How he loved that kid.

Hate plus love equaled like.

He liked Fran.

Some days.

It was also because of Fran that he was there, on the wooden bench, at the park, in the middle of the day, and had been waiting for someone for over an hour.

Scratch the 'liking Fran' part.

He tolerated the kid.

There, that was better.

"Mukuro Rokudo?"

Mukuro glanced up to see a man with white-ish hair running towards him. The man, when he reached him, bowed deeply. "I am terribly sorry that I'm late! I had kind of forgotten that I was supposed to be here, and by the time I had found the memo telling me to meet you here, I was already forty-five minutes late!"

Mukuro frowned. "It's fine," he muttered.

_Like hell it's fine! My skin is burning!_

Something in the back of his mind labeled 'common sense' decided to speak up.

'_That's why you need to go out into the sun, Master. Or wear sun-block. They both work. You're a bit too pale for normal standards.'_

Why did his common sense sound eerily like his little one?

_'I just sound like him to annoy you. And it's working, judging from your response to the sound of my voice. Think of it as payback for calling me _little one_.'_

Mukuro then decided that after he got what he needed, he was going home, taking a large sleeping pill, and passing out.

_'Good idea.'_

Trying to not make his eyebrow fall off at the rate that it was twitching, Mukuro waved his hand at the other man.

"Just give me the information regarding my new apprentice."

[][][][][]

"You know, bears aren't that bad."

"Ushishi."

They were sitting outside their cottage, a fire going and sporting full stomachs. After having beaten the bear and chasing it off (Fran saw his senpai in a whole new light now) the two had sat down, each having a very intense staring match with the other. It had become so intense that they didn't blink for nearly three minutes.

Their concentration, however, was ruined when the bear came lumbering back, a branch sporting berries in its mouth. It dropped the branch near them, growled, then left again.

The berries had been delicious.

And Bel saw that the berries were good.

With a content sigh, Bel leaned over and smiled at Fran.

Said person being smiled at shifted uncomfortably. "Senpai, stop smiling at me. It's making me feel uncomfortable and causing my forehead to sweat."

Bel snickered and flopped down onto his back. "We still need to finish our talk, Froggy."

"What talk?"

"You referred to yourself as my wife..."

Fran popped another berry into his mouth, chewing silently. "I never knew that you understood what the word 'referred' meant, senpai. Congratulations."

Bel gave out a 'che' sound, instinctively reaching for a knife and touching the cold metal to Fran's neck. "The Prince knows lots of big words."

"Like?"

"..."

"Senpai?"

"..."

"You don't remember any big words, do you?"

"S-shut up!"

With a sigh, Fran leaned down and placed his head on Bel's chest. "You know, senpai? I think that I learned to like you a little bit more today."

Bel felt his heart begin to pump faster. Had Fran just said what he'd thought he'd said? Bel allowed the flush that was creeping up his face to happen. He felt...giddy. "Ushishishi. The Prince is happy."

And for some reason, Fran, who was occupying time by listening to his senpai's heartbeat, felt happy himself.

_You know, senpai. I might just fall in love with you-_

"Now, Froggy, the Prince wants dessert. Go and find something in the forest fit for a prince!"

And as Fran dodged the knives his senpai was throwing at him as he was forced to the entrance of the forest, he had to take back what he'd thought.

_Never mind, I lied. I won't be able to fall in love with you._

He just never knew how wrong he was.

* * *

End of Chapter

Well, I hope that you will let me know what you thought of it. It helps with motivation knowing that I have people who like the story. I also hope that you liked the story about the Bel. I wanted to make it longer when he was cursing his brother but... I kind of ran out of words. It came to me as a surprise. But, I dealt.

Lots of love,

UO


	6. Uncomfortable silence

**Author's notes:** Here I am, once again, with a long overdue update! I'm sorry that this update came so late, but college -laughs- is having fun kicking my ass and sending me to hell and back. What with the assignments and lectures and wondering if some of your professors are on crack, it can be hectic. But, I managed to scrape some time together and finish this chapter! It would have been up sooner, but my laptop decided to crash on me and the chapter got deleted. Needless to say, I almost took an axe to my poor laptop. But it's working for me again (no doubt because it knows that if it crashes again, I will axe it), and here is the next installment of _The Diamond in the Midden_. I hope that you enjoy it! And I need to send out a big **thank you** to those who reviewed. You cannot begin to know how happy the reviews make me. I love every one of them.

**Disclaimer: **In another life, in an alternate dimension, I own KHR. Sadly, that dimension was destroyed in a Spork war, so I cannot truthfully say that I own it.

* * *

There is always a point in someone's life that an epiphany happens. The epiphany can be good or bad. It can be scary, happy, emotional, terrifying, or stupid. They can be fast epiphanies, or short epiphanies. They come in all shapes and sizes. To Fran, his epiphany was something that he thought he should have learned a long time ago. It was a bland epiphany, and it came to him in the form of the wind being knocked out of him.

"Senpai, can you please tell me how you came to the conclusion that jumping off of a cliff while being chased by three lions and dragging me with you was a good idea?"

He was married to a maniac.

They were sitting on a ledge, about twenty feet from the top of the cliff, and about a thousand feet from the bottom of the cliff. They were huddled together, there hardly being enough room on the ledge for both of them, with their arms wrapped around each other, gripping tightly in the blowing wind.

Bel glared at him, and he lifted one of his hands away slightly to stab a knife into Fran's arm.

"Ow," Fran stated, not really feeling the pain seeing as his body was numb from the wind. "I guess that what they say is true..."

"Hmm?"

"Angry people need sharp objects to be happy."

"Ushishishi. The Prince isn't angry. Froggy was just being stupid."

_He's insane, _Fran thought as he tightened his grip on his senpai. "How was I being stupid, senpai? I wasn't the one who jumped off of the cliff," he said in monotone, his face as equally blank as his voice.

"I wasn't the one who jumped off. Froggy did."

"_I'm _the one who jumped off of the cliff. And you, what? Just happened to be here as well?"

Bel was silent. Fran sighed in relief.

Another breeze blew by, having a grand old time and laughing at the two idiots who where huddling on the ledge. Fran shivered again. "So, how are we going to get back up, senpai?"

Bel was silent.

Fran sighed in dismay.

_Earlier that morning_

"Senpai, I don't think that your 'shortcut' is actually a shortcut."

Fran counted to six before tossing himself to the ground, barely avoiding the seven knives that Bel tossed in his direction. They planted themselves in the conveniently placed tree behind Fran. He turned his head around and stared at the shape that they made. It looked like a heart. Well, it looked like a heart that had been torn apart by a five year old and put back together by a seven year old, but Fran decided to go with it.

"Wow, senpai. Look at that. I didn't know that you cared!"

Bel turned around, his face sporting a scowl that deepened when he was the not-really-a-heart-but-really-no-one-cares-but-Bel-not-heart-heart on the tree. He took out another knife and tossed it at the tree. Smirking, he turned back around. "There, it's dead."

Fran stood up from the ground and looked at his senpai with a long glare. "Senpai, do you _really_ know where we are going? I'd rather not die from starvation if you have gotten us lost."

They had been in the jungle for a week, and, surprisingly, they had survived not killing each other, and not being killed by the random animals. They had also learned a lot about each other. Bel learned that Fran was really good at cooking meals with whatever he was provided with. Fran had said that being an archeologist and living in random places while working had taught him how to improvise. Fran learned that Bel was an amazing hunter. Earlier that week, he'd caught a wild boar, and the boar had fed them for a while. Bel concluded that if they were ever stranded on an island, they would make a great team. Fran was still unconvinced.

At the moment, they were making their way to a hot spring that Bel said 'was around here somewhere'. Neither of them had bathed since before they'd been put in the jungle, and they both smelled really bad.

Also, when _things_ started to grow on you, you knew you needed to bathe.

Badly.

_But,_ Fran thought, his gaze on his senpai as they trudged along. _We've been walking on this 'shortcut' for two hours. If we had just gone on the normal route, we'd have been there by now..._

"Senpai, are you sure you know where you're going?"

Bel was walking a few feet ahead of him, his arms behind his head. "Ushishishi. The Prince is on the right track."

"Better get off before you get run over," Fran mumbled.

"Hmm?"

"Nothing..."

They continued to walk for a few more minutes before Fran got bored. He didn't like being bored. Because being bored wasn't something that he like, he decided to annoy his senpai. Annoying his senpai was fun.

"Bel-senpai, so is the thing on the top of your head a crown or a tiara?"

Bel froze. "It's a crown, fit for a prince."

Fran cocked his head to the side. "No, I have to say it looks more like a tiara fit for a princess."

Bel frowned. Fran paused, wondering if he should continue. _Well, this would if I did continue, the next one would be strike two...so I'm good._ "Senpai, you should get an actual crown."

"Idiot Frog. This _is _ a crown."

"Stupid senpai- ...I can't call you that. If I called you stupid it would be an insult to stupid people."

Strike three.

Over the past week, along with all of the other things he'd learned about Bel, Fran had mastered the ability to predict when his senpai would toss his knives. The first offense meant he had ten seconds to duck. The second offense meant he had six seconds to dodge. The third offense meant that Fran needed to turn around and run screaming in the opposite direction. ...But Fran didn't scream. It just wasn't his thing. And, seeing as he'd just hit strike three, he turned around and began to run, his senpai chasing after him with an annoyed look on his flushed and (although it took a lot for Fran to admit it) handsome face.

Fran couldn't stop the tiny smile that appeared on his face.

[][][][][]

Mukuro Rokudo wasn't a patient man when it came to people. In fact, he just wasn't a patient man. And because he wasn't a patient man, he had to deal with listening to his toys talk, complain, and make up excuses as to why they failed to do something he'd asked them to do. Sometimes he thought that he would've made a good Mafia villain.

"And then the copy machine exploded, and-and I was trying to put out the fire while on the phone, and the fire just kept spreading and soon the whole building had caught fire and-"

Mukuro sighed as he listened to the man continue to ramble. _If only I was sitting on some high throne, overlooking this pathetic person. That would make me feel so much better._

"-my mom is in a coma and my sister needs therapy because of her bastard of an ex-boyfriend and-" the man placed his hands on the ground on front of him and bowed his head to his hands. "Please don't kill me!"

Mukuro blinked. Well, this wasn't something he saw every other day. It usually only happened once a month. _I'm not _that_ heartless. ...Oh wait, I am._ _Never mind!_ Sighing, Mukuro tossed a book at the man on the ground. "Get up," he said, pulling one of his student's essays in front of him. "Listen, if you don't want me to..._kill_ you, then just get on the phone again, and call the airport and get me a ticket for this Thursday. Okay?"

The man nodded his head rapidly, repeatedly hitting his head on the ground. Mukuro tried to hide a smirk. It was very hard.

"I will, sir! I will! I'll do it now!"

With that, the man got up and dashed from the room, almost hitting the wall on the way out. Mukuro then let the smirk show on his face. He glanced down at the file he'd been given on his new apprentice. "Tsunayoshi Sawada..." He muttered.

He had already known a little bit about the brown haired archeologist from his other apprentice, Fran, but this file had given him the knowledge he'd needed to know.

"I'll be seeing you sooner than you think."

_Over in Italy, in Bel's castle_

Tsuna sneezed.

Enma glanced over at him from his spot on the couch. "You okay?"

Tsuna nodded, trying to ignore the shiver that suddenly ran down his spine.

_In the jungle, with Bel and Fran_

Normally, he could run fast. Normally, he didn't lose his breath quickly. Normally, which existed in an alternate dimension where he was an illusionist for the Mafia and an assassin, he could outrun Bel. Sadly, Normally didn't belong in this dimension, because Fran knew that he wasn't an illusionist and everyone knew that assassins didn't make enough money for it to be a suitable job. So, after coming to a conclusion, Fran realized he needed to find a way to make his senpai stop his rampage. A few ideas came to mind, but one really stuck out.

He stopped running, and, turning around, placed his hand out in front of him, palm up. "Stop, senpai."

Bel did stop, coming to a halt right in front of Fran, a confused look on his face.

"Senpai, in order for this to be a 'correct' chase, according to the Anime Manual, book C, chapter seven, paragraph four, subsection two, I need to have a flash back to some point in my life to reveal all that I've gone through and, in the end, realize something about myself that I never really knew...or something."

Bel cocked his head to the side, 'hmm'ing. Then he nodded. "Fine, but make it quick. The Prince isn't really good with the whole idea of 'patience'."

_I already knew that,_ Fran thought, but he shook his head at his senpai as he continued. "Sorry, senpai, but according to the Anime Manual, book C, chapter nine, paragraph three, subsection five, the flash back needs to be at least five minutes long... Or thirty minutes and take up an entire episode."

Bel sighed in disappointment. "Okay...Try not to make it thirty-"

He stopped suddenly. "Shishishi, stupid Froggy. We're not in an anime episode!"

"Or are we?"

It was like the single question that Bel had been searching for his entire life had been asked; his face lit up, his mouth slightly open, and the breaths he took were ragged and quick. He brought a hand to his head slowly, before curling it into a fist and slamming it down on his other palm. "I knew it..." he muttered. "This is all the government's doing! I knew that they were planning something big, the Prince just didn't know what!"

_Dear god. _And Fran had been hoping that there was at least one cell in Bel's brain that wasn't corrupt. He had been wrong:

His husband believed in government conspiracy.

Fran's life just kept getting better and better.

He was staring at Bel with his jaw slightly open (there was a possibility that emotions were showing on his face) when it hit him. "Senpai, your family is the 'government' of your land."

Bel was silent for a minute before- "Oh. Right."

They stood there, letting the wind blow their hair around their faces in a circular motion that defied all logic. Then, Bel spoke. "So...run Froggy."

Fran sighed. "Alright, but you owe me."

And he turned to run.

He didn't really get a chance to actually run, seeing as soon as he'd turned around, Bel had tackled him. The two were sent rolling down a hill that Fran hadn't noticed before; instinctively, Fran gripped the front of Bel's shirt, and Bel tightened the grip he had on Fran's waist. They rolled for a while, before their rolling was stopped by a splash.

A warm splash, but it was still rather shocking.

Fran opened his eyes and the first thing he saw was an eyeful of Bel's hair. He spat some out of his mouth before shaking his head to get rid of some of the hair covering his eyes. Then he saw where they were.

They were in water. And it was warm. Using the amazing power of his brain, Fran came to the conclusion that they had rolled directly to the hot spring. It wasn't the most effective method he knew for finding things, but it seemed to have worked. He could feel the warm water washing away the dirt from his body and it felt good. Now, if he could only get Bel off of him...

"Senpai, get off. I'm having a hard time breathing."

"Shishishi. The Prince doesn't weigh that much, Froggy. The Prince is in good shape."

"Sure, if you think that _round _is a good shape..."

Man, Fran was extra snarky today. It felt good.

Bel frowned, but he did get off. He sat down next to Fran and pointed to a spot a little to their left. "That part is deep, so we can wash our bodies there."

He began to take off his shirt, and Fran immediately turned his head away. Bel had a nice body-

_No, bad Fran, bad Fran! You are not attracted to Bel, you are not!_

Fran stood up and walked over to the deeper part of the spring. The water was slightly warmer then the water where he'd landed. There, he took off his shirt and began to get rid of the dirt and grime on his body. _God, this feels good._

"Shishishi. Froggy, do you want the Prince to wash your back?"

_And now this just feels awkward..._

"No, I'm fine. I can wash my back myself."

"Ushishishi. Fine, Froggy!"

And there was uncomfortable silence. And Bel saw that it was awkward.

"So... do you like meat?"

Fran blinked. "Yeah, I guess? I don't eat it that often."

"Oh. I like it, but I don't think that anyone can love it as much as Xanxus."

"He does like his meat."

"That he does..."

And there was more awkward silence, until Fran spoke up again. "So...do you like...bubbles?"

_With Tsuna, and his new friend, Mr. Paper bag_

"Breathe, Tsuna, breathe. Take deep and slow breaths."

"I know how to breathe, Enma! I don't think that this will do any thing to help calm my nerves!"

Enma sighed and picked up the paper bag that Tsuna had tossed to the ground. He was grateful that Tsuna hadn't ripped the bag; he'd already ripped seven other ones and Enma didn't want to have to clean up any more then he already had to. "I was trying to help, but if you don't want it..."

Tsuna sighed before he nodded and held out his hand for his bag. Enma handed it to him. "I'm sorry, Enma, but Fran's master, Mukuro... He really scares me."

Enma sat down next to him. "Why does he scare you so much?"

Tsuna sighed. "I saw what he'd done to Fran once..."

_Flashback..._

It was ghastly, horrible, and completely inhumane. "Fran, you're absolutely _positive _that your _master_ did this to you?"

"I have a lot of stab wounds, Tsuna, and I've lost a lot of blood. I didn't lose my eyes."

Tsuna once again looked over Fran's frame, eying the many stab wounds on his friend's body. Fran was staring at him, his face blank as usual. "How much longer am I going to have to stay here?"

Tsuna huffed. "You still have to have another bag of blood put back into your system. You'll be here at least for the night, but that's only if they don't decide your _stab wounds_ need more attention."

Fran sighed. "Damn. I was hoping for sooner then that. I don't really like hospitals."

_Then maybe you shouldn't let your master stab you!_ "So...how did this actually happen, Fran? I'm sure that your master doesn't just randomly stab things when he's mad."

"You haven't met my master, have you?"

Tsuna gulped. "Why did he do this?"

Fran shrugged his shoulders as he attempted to sit up in bed. "I called him the Master of Everything Pineapple. He didn't like it, I guess."

"Is...this his normal reaction?"

"Yeah. Pretty much."

They stared at each other for a while before a tiny smile appeared on Fran's face. "I think that he would like you."

Tsuna would have given a sound of shock out if Fran hadn't pointed a pale finger at the tray that was sitting in Tsuna's lap. "Is that pudding?"

_End of flashback..._

"H-he s-stabbed Fran?

Tsuna nodded. "Yes, fifteen times, none of the stabs fatal, and Fran needed three bags of blood pumped back into him."

Enma bit his lip. "But, you can't judge him because of that one memory. You haven't actually _met_ him, have you?"

Tsuna shook his head, bringing a hand to his chin. "I haven't...not really."

"Then maybe he isn't the person that you think he is? Maybe he was just having a bad day?"

Enma didn't sound very convincing, but Tsuna decided to give him the benefit of the doubt. _Well, I guess I can look at it that way. That makes the situation seem less life threatening. But, Fran comes home three days before the contract officially starts so that means I'll only have three days before my life is over..._

Three days...

Tsuna suddenly shot up from the chair he was sitting on, a look of great happiness. "Enma," he yelled, grabbing Enma's hands and pulling him up, dancing them around in a circle. Enma looked very confused and shocked. "Fran comes back from the jungle _three days_ before my contract with Mukuro begins! That means that there will be time for him to make the contract null and void!" With that, Tsuna let go of Enma and began to leave the room. "Ah, I feel a lot better now. Thanks, Enma!"

Enma gave him a few feeble waves as he watched the brown haired man leave the room. "Uh...sure?"

He stood there in silence for a good minute, just staring at the door before he shook his head and bent down to pick up the torn bags that Tsuna had ripped earlier in his panic.

"Oh, Master Enma, sir!"

Enma looked up to see one of the castle servants standing in the doorway. He smiled at her. "Did you need something?"

She nodded. "Yes, we received a notice that we will be having another guest arriving in two days' time. The Queen has asked that you help supervise the arranging of the room that he'll be staying in."

"Do you know who the guest will be?"

The girl looked at the paper that she was holding in her hands. "I believe that it is... One Mukuro Rokudo. One of Master Fran's friends."

Enma let a small, slightly disturbed smile slip onto his face. "Oh...okay..."

The maid curtsied. "I'll show you the room that we have picked out for him, then?"

Enma nodded and followed the maid out of the room. _Sorry Tsuna. Looks like things won't be going the way you thought after all..._

_In the Jungle, The Mighty Jungle, the Lions...etc. etc.  
_

_Mental Diary, page thirty-six._

_Bel-senpai really is insane. Do you want to know _how_ insane? You do, huh, Diary? Well, so after we took the bath in the hot spring, Bel decided that we should try to find something suitable to eat. I was hungry, so I decided that he was right. So, we go 'hunting'. I find us some berries that I thought were not poisonous, and what does my _amazing_ husband find us? _

_Lions._

_Three of them. _

_And they were sleeping._

_So, he throws rocks at the sleeping lions._

For fun, _he said. _

_The lions obviously didn't think that it was fun, because now, they are chasing us. Have I mentioned, Diary, that I'm not the best sprinter? _

"Senpai, I swear I'm going to _kill_ you!"

"Shishi! Just keep running Froggy!"

A few feet behind them, Fran could hear the roaring of the lions. _They don't sound happy. _"Senpai," he panted. "I'm not sure that I can run much farther."

Bel surprised him by reaching behind him and grabbing Fran's hand. "I'll make sure that you do," he called out, and Fran suddenly found himself being pulled along.

It was easier to run when Bel was helping create momentum. As they ran, Fran had a sudden feeling that everything was going to be fine. But, then, he looked back at the lions and the feeling disappeared. The lions were catching up. They were catching up at a rather fast rate. Fran was unsure if he and Bel were going to make it. "Senpai," he called out.

Bel probably heard him, because the next thing he knew Fran was being yanked sideways; they dashed out into a clearing with a cliff. The lions followed them. Bel backed them up to the edge of the cliff, his grip painfully tight on Fran's hand.

"Senpai...what are you planning?"

"Shh."

Bel and the lions began a stare down match. Neither Bel nor the lions seemed to want to back down; the lions let out a low growl. Bel let out a growl of his own back at them. Then, the lions charged.

Fran thought that Bel would do something heroic, like he'd done with the bear earlier that week. What Bel did, though, was not something that Fran had even thought about:

Bel turned and jumped off the cliff, dragging Fran with him.

This was where Fran's epiphany decided to hit.

_Present Time..._

"Shishishi. We're lucky that this ledge was here, aren't we, Froggy?"

Bel snickered when Fran gave him a sharp look. Then he proceeded to tighten the grip he had on Fran when the smaller man shivered violently. "Cold, Froggy?"

"No, I'm actually very hot right now. Boiling, in fact."

"Oh. Shishishi."

And there was silence. And Fran saw that it was slightly uncomfortable. "So, uh...do you like...um, board games?"

Bel stared at him. "I do, actually. I find them rather engaging and fun. I really like chess; it makes your brain work."

"Oh..."

"Do you like any...board games?"

"Yes. But I prefer card games. I really like the game Speed. It's good for the reflexes."

"I see."

"Yeah..."

More uncomfortable silence ensued until Bel spoke up again.

"Do you like...um...cheese?"

And time went on.

_Three hours later_

"Senpai...we've been here for three hours. I'm starting to get hungry."

"The Prince is working on that, Froggy! Just wait for a while longer!"

Fran sat back in a huff. Bel had his back lined up with Fran's back, and he was fiddling with something in his hands.

"Yeah, I'd like to make this a delivery."

_Huh?_

Fran turned his head around sharply; Bel was talking on a phone. _This doesn't make any sense._ "Senpai, what are you doing?"

Bel pulled his phone down from his ear slightly. "Ushishishi. The Prince is ordering a pizza. What would Froggy like? Pepperoni, cheese, sausage, anchovies?"

Fran was stunned. Was Bel...actually serious? "How the _hell_ are you able to order a pizza? There's no phone service here."

"I have Verizon. I've got the network. Duh."

Fran blinked. _Hmm...maybe I should switch to Verizon, then. All I've got is Sprint, and I don't get service anywhere! Wait... That's not the point!_

"So...what kind of pizza does Froggy want?"

The question threw Fran off balance, what he was going to say dying on his tongue. "Uh...cheese?"

Bel nodded, that insane smirk on his face, and went back to his phone. "Okay, we'll have two large cheeses, one large pepperoni, and one large sausage." He paused. "It's delivery." Another pause. "Put it on my tab." Another pause. "We are on a cliff in the Jungle." Pause. "Okay, we'll be waiting. And bring a rope as well. We need to get off this thing."

He hung up.

"We'll get off this in about twenty minutes, Froggy."

Fran tapped Bel on his shoulder, forcing Bel to face him. "How are they going to find us? All you told them was that we were on a cliff in the jungle."

"Shishi. Don't worry. Every pizza delivery person knows how to find someone of the royal family. They are trained for it. Being a pizza delivery person is a very hard job to do. There's lost of training. Sort of like government training."

Fran felt like he should worry. A big part of his soul was screaming at him that they were going to die on this cliff, but a small, tiny part of his soul that was hidden at the very bottom of his heart was saying to trust his husband.

He wanted to live, so he decided to listen to the tiny part of himself.

The larger part of his soul was really put out.

Sure enough, twenty minutes later, a helicopter arrived overhead, a rope dangling from it. Bel caught the rope and tied it around his waist. "Come here, Frog," he said, holding out one of his hands. Fran took it, wanting to get off of the hellish cliff. Bel gripped him tightly and the helicopter pulled them up and off of the ledge.

When they were high in the air, Fran gripped his senpai tight and let his face bury into Bel's chest, letting his face get some sort of feeling back into it. Since his face was covered, he completely missed the insanely happy look Bel let slip onto his face.

The helicopter set them down a few feet from the cliff, and as soon as Bel let go of the rope four pizza boxes were sent soaring at them. Bel caught them, and soon the helicopter was flying out of sight. Fran watched it go before he was forced to carry two of the pizza boxes when Bel shoved them into his arms.

Maybe it was the fact that the warm pizzas where helping to get the blood circulation going through his body again, but for some reason, the more Fran thought about it, the more pissed he got.

"Senpai," he called out, seeing as Bel had already started walking back into the jungle. "How long have you had your phone on you?"

Bel kept on walking, forcing Fran to walk with him. "Since we were sent here. Shishi."

"But wouldn't the battery have died by now?"

"Shishishi, silly Froggy. I have many batteries that I brought with me. I brought them along with the tranquilizer, bazooka, and shotgun. I have them all with me right now, actually."

_Oh...kay? _

How was that possible?

"Senpai, how is that possible?"

"I keep them in the handy space anomaly that every anime character has. Don't you know that we have them? That's how all of the characters in anime and manga are able to whip out these giant weapons from out of nowhere."

Fran sighed, annoyed. "Senpai, I thought we already established that we are _not_ in an anime."

"Or are we?"

Fran sighed again.

Then it hit him.

"You've had a tranquilizer, bazooka, _and_ a shotgun this entire week and you've never thought about using them while we were being chased by all of the lions and bears?"

Bel stopped walking and turned to face him. Fran had a small frown on his face. Bel had learned that the small frown meant that Fran was pissed. "Nope," he answered honestly.

The pizza boxes fell to the ground (the boxes feeling very put out) and Fran snapped his fingers. A lion appeared by his side, growling loudly. Bel stared at it. "How did you do that?"

"Didn't you know, senpai? All anime characters can summon wild animals and the such."

Bel snickered before turning around and bolting from the area. Fran placed a hand on the lions head. "Go get the yellow yarn," he stated, rather bored. The lion looked like it was smiling before it took off after Bel. Fran watched it go, yawning.

In irritated Fran meant a vengeful Fran. Vengeful Fran knew how to get revenge. And he was good at it.

He picked back up the boxes of pizza, thinking about the warm cheese and the bread and-

"_Froggy-"_

-and the hot and crunchy crust and-

"_Froggy, wake up. Come on, Froggy."_

_-_and Bel really needed to stop calling his name because he was having such a good dream-

Fran's eyes suddenly shot open and he saw that he was asleep, his body completely in Bel's lap, his head resting right beneath Bel's head, and that he was still stuck on the cliff.

_Damn._

Bel was looking down at him with a smirk on his face. "Shishishi. Have a good nap, Froggy?"

Fran sighed. "I did, until you decided to wake me up."

The pizza had felt and smelled so real. _They say that dreams is just your subconscious telling you what you truly want._

_I guess that I really want a pizza. Or I really want to watch an anime. One of those two._

He climbed out of Bel's lap and sat down next to the blond. "Have you figured out how we're going to get off of this cliff?"

Bel nodded. "I'm going to climb up, then go back to the cottage, get some rope, and then come back for you."

A strong gust of wind came by at that moment, causing Fran to realize just how cold he was; he couldn't feel his limbs. That was not a good sign. "And while you do that, I'll freeze to death here. Just perfect."

He was surprised when he felt warmth settle over his body and he looked up to see that Bel had placed his jacket on his shoulders. "Senpai..."

Bel snickered. "I'll be going now." He said and he leaned down and planted a kiss on Fran's temple.

Fran was surprised that he actually thought the kiss felt good. He closed his eyes, letting the momentary warmth wash over him, and when he opened his eyes Bel was already climbing up the cliff. Fran watched him go until Bel was at the top of the cliff and was out of sight. Then he sighed and curled up into Bel's coat, letting the familiar sent of his senpai wash over him.

_God, I'm acting like a sap._

And so, because he didn't want to act like a sap, he decided to ponder life, the world, and the universe. After a few minutes, he got bored, so he stared off into space, letting his mind wander around aimlessly.

[][][][][]

One of Bel's most fondest memories of Fran happened during science class. Bel had wanted his last year to be fun, so he took a class that he knew did a lot of dissecting. He thought that it would be good practice before he used his dissecting skills on a certain green frog.

The teacher was busy calling out names, assigning students to each other as partners. There were groans, exclamations of 'yay', and even 'If you make me fail this class I will kill you' floating around the room. Bel didn't really pay attention until his name was called, along with another name.

"Belphegor and Fran, you are the last pair. Don't kill each other."

Bel snickered and picked up his books, making his way over to where Fran was sitting, reading a book. He sat down rather loudly and slammed his books down on the table. Fran glanced up from his book. "Going to attempt to kill me again today?"

Bel sighed. "No, the Prince and the Frog are science partners. The Prince isn't really happy about that..."

"As if I like it, I really can't stand you. You annoy me. And you have stupid hair."

Bel frowned. He liked his hair. Deciding not to wait any longer, he help up a scalpel. "I can't wait to dissect you, Frog. I wonder what your insides look like?"

Fran put the book down and opened his mouth, intent on replying, but the teacher spoke up, causing a halt in their...conversation.

"Belphegor! Put the scalpel down, now! I will not have you sending more students to the hospital!"

Bel snickered again before putting down the scalpel. "Shishi. Froggy was saved by the teacher."

Fran rolled his eyes and waited for the teacher's assistant to finish passing out the trays with the dead frogs on them. He stared at the one that was placed in front of them before picking up his gloves and putting them on. Bel snickered beside him. "Looks like one of your relatives, Froggy!"

The left corner of Fran's lip tilted up a tad, and Bel's smirk slipped off his face. Was Fran..._smiling?_ Bel was captivated by it and he felt himself leaning forward.

Fran turned to stare at him, the smile gone. "Don't you have something to do, senpai?"

Bel cocked his head to the side. "Hmm?"

Their teacher suddenly looked up from her desk. "Yes, you have something very important to do."

Bel suddenly noticed that the entire class was staring at him. "Ushishishi. The Prince just needs to open up the frog here."

Fran sighed and poked the dead frog with his scalpel. "True, but you also have another 'frog' sitting on a ledge on the side of a cliff, don't you?"

Bel blinked. _I do? But I'm in science class? I'm not near a cliff..._

Fran then leaned forward and placed his head on Bel's shoulder. "I think that you should get going... _husband._" He said, before he held up the scalpel and jammed it into Bel's eye...

Bel's eyes snapped open, and he shot himself up from the bed he was laying on. He ran a hand through his hair and sighed. "Stupid dream..." he muttered, and he placed the rope that was in his hand beside him.

Wait, rope?

Bel looked down and stared at the coil of rope. The rope felt uncomfortable and tried to look inconspicuous. And that was when it hit him.

He'd come back to the cottage to get rope. He needed the rope because...because.

Well shit.

He must have fallen asleep after getting the rope from underneath the bed.

_Looks like I do have a frog waiting for me on a cliff._

_At the cliff_

Fran stared at the animal sitting next to him, a frown on his face. "What are you looking at?"

The small, green frog blinked at him before letting out loud 'ribbit' as if to say, _don't look at me! I don't even know how I got here! _It then hopped over and landed on Fran's head before it sat down and began to croak.

Fran sighed.

* * *

**Notes: **So, yeah... That's the update. I really don't know what I was on when I finished this, but I like it. Hope you guys do. And as for the frog at the ending, I couldn't help it. I saw a frog the other day at a pet shop and it stuck with me. It really was adorable. And, did you guys see that? -points to story- I totally put in a kiss, just for you guys.

Lots of love and a happy early Halloween,

UO


	7. Let's Blow an Artery

**_Disclaimer:_ **Pssh... I wish.

Chapter seven: Let's Blow an Artery

* * *

Murder.

If one spelled it backwards then it would be redrum. It meant the end of one life; one more heart stopping, two eyes closing, one last breath, two ears that can't hear, two lungs not taking in air... It meant one less person in the world.

And, if Fran had done his math homework correctly, it also meant one less prince named Belphegor in the world. _Now, _Fran thought, running his idea over in his mind. _How am I going to get some arsenic..._?

Friedrich Nietzsche once said, "A casual stroll through the lunatic asylum shows that faith alone does not prove anything."

Fran decided, while sitting on the edge of his cliff with all of his many animal friends sitting beside him (a frog, a rather odd looking duck and a slug), that a casual stroll through a lunatic asylum would be much more fun than sitting on the edge of a cliff, waiting for your husband to bring rope to rescue you.

_Life just sucks like that I guess..._

The frog sitting on his head croaked, as if to say, _try being an _actual_ frog. You get almost eaten by _everything_. That is what it means for life to suck._

Fran had to find himself agreeing with the frog.

Then he found himself wondering if Bel's insanity had rubbed off on him.

_I'm having imaginary conversations with a frog. I knew it. I'm going crazy._

The frog hopped down from his head and landed directly in front of him. It stared at him with big eyes, its head tilted to the side, as if saying, _you're completely crazy. Glad you figured that out, _before turning and hopping off of the ledge they were currently occupying. Fran stared at it.

"A frog just committed suicide in front of me. Wow..."

The duck and the slug both looked at him, the looks on their faces asking, _why are we sitting here with the crazy person?_

They didn't seem to get the answer, so they too turned and hopped off the cliff ledge. Fran almost threw his hands up in the air, but Fran was Fran, and Fran didn't do motions like that with his hands. It would make it seem as though he felt emotion. Which, he didn't. At all.

Maybe.

Sort of.

_Alright, so I do feel some emotion. Sue me._

So, he sat there, waiting. Bel had said that he'd be back with something to help get Fran off the cliff _(he said rope, _his mind told him... Again)_,_ but the archeologist had been sitting there for a very long time. Almost too long of a time. Fran frowned. "I'm going to kill him... I swear, I'm going to kill him..."

He stood up and looked up at the top of the cliff. _Looks like I'm going to have to climb it._ He looked down at himself and sighed. Maybe he should start going to the gym more often, to build up some muscles...

_Nah, I like the way I am_.

He blinked, his heart almost stopping.

_-Brain does not compute with statement. Verify detonation?-_

Fran was shocked. He was genuinely shocked. _I _like_ the way I am...? Where the _hell_ did _that_ come from? _

Shaking his head (and making the mental note to kill his mind with the left over arsenic that he would be using to kill Bel), Fran looked back up at the cliff. "Well, let's get to it."

And he started to climb.

[*]*[*]

Squalo was _not_ an errand boy for Xanxus, not matter how many times he was asked if he was. Sure, he ran some errands for the meat loving psycho, but that was _only _because no one else was capable enough to buy the right meat.

How hard was it to buy the right meat for Xanxus?

"A-and then w-when I got bac...b-back, he sh... said that he didn't want... didn't want this kind of... meat and that I'd h-have to go back and get... the... the... kind of meat that... h-he wanted."

According to the person who was bleeding out on the ground in front of him, it was pretty hard.

_Imbeciles_.

Squalo sighed. _Why do I always have to do this by myself? Why is no one else capable?_

The person on the ground was still bleeding out in front of him. Squalo glared at him. "VOOI! Get yourself to a hospital! And then, when you've been put back together, get your ass back here and clean up all of the blood on the ground, got it? You're the one spilling the blood on the carpet, so you're going to be the one who cleans it up!" He stormed over to the entrance of the mansion, but turned around to glare at the man on the ground, who was trying – and failing – to reach for a phone. "And I swear, if that blood stains the carpet, so help you I will make sure that you are not able to make it to the hospital next time! I am _not_ replacing that carpet again!"

He was halfway out the door when he heard it:

"PIECE OF SHIT, GET UP HERE!"

Squalo wanted to burn the mansion down. But then again, that would make Xanxus fairly happy, and Squalo didn't want that.

...no, he really didn't.

...maybe.

Growling, he made his way back into the mansion, past the man who was still bleeding out, and up the stairs to Xanxus' room. He didn't even bother to knock (everyone who wanted to enter Xanxus' room had to knock. It was a rule. A rule that Squalo broke every time), instead he kicked the door open and stormed in, his hair billowing quite impressively behind him.

"What," he bellowed. "What do you want now?"

Xanxus was sitting behind his desk, leaning back in his chair with his legs propped up on the desk and a glass of wine sitting in his hand. He was also frowning. More than usual. _Great..._

Xanxus stared at him. "Tell me what is missing here."

Squalo blinked.

Well, this was an interesting question. Was it some kind of new game?

"Uh..."

Xanxus glared this time. "Seriously, tell me what is missing. _Now."_

Two seconds later, Squalo ducked as Xanxus tossed the wine glass at him. "VOI! I don't know!"

Xanxus pointed to the corner. "Tell me. What. Is. Missing." he hissed.

Squalo looked over at the empty corner, eyes skimming over the blanket, the bowl of water, bowl of meat, and the empty-

_Oh._

"Oh."

Xanxus' eyes narrowed. "Yeah. _Oh._"

And there was silence.

Xanxus spoke up again. "Where is Mr. Little Princess Fluffypoo?"

And suddenly Squalo was reminded of exactly _why_ Xanxus' pet lion/liger/really-what-the-hell-is-that-animal ran off so much. The poor thing's name was awful.

Really.

"I don't know..."

Squalo ducked as a wine cooler was tossed at him. _Where the hell did that come from?_

"Well, find him, you mother fucker!"

Once again, Squalo had to remind himself that he was _not_ Xanxus' errand boy. He was just whipped. Really, _really_ badly.

[*]*[*]

Fran was confused. He was more confused than Holy-is-Lussuria-really-a-male-or-just-an-odd-looking-transvestite situation, and that is really confusing in and of itself.

"Okay? I could have sworn you were a lion before this..."

Sitting in front of him was the lion. _The _lion. The Lion. He blinked at it.

The lion blinked back. Or... Fran thought that it was a lion.

_This is awkward...lions don't normally have tiger stripes._

He'd climbed up the cliff to find himself face-to-face with the lion that had been stalking him ever since he'd been dumped into the god-awful jungle. The lion had been sitting at the cliff edge, with a dead bunny in its mouth, and as soon as Fran had climbed completely up, the lion had dropped the bunny at his feet and sat down.

Fran stared at the bunny. Then at the lion. Then back at the bunny. "Thanks...?"

The lion huffed, as if to say, _no problem. I kind of like you. You're much better than my master._

Fran stood up, bunny in hand, and said, "Okay, so I'm going to be going now...?"

And the lion responded with, _my name is Bester. But my master calls me Mr. Little Princess Fluffypoo._

"Oh, I'm sorry."

_Not as sorry as I am..._

And since the conversation was getting more awkward than Fran had thought it would be, he turned and began to make his way back into the jungle. Now, with the lion behind him, he could focus on the situation at hand:

Mission: How To Kill Bel-senpai and Get Away With It.

…_This is going to be impossible..._

As he trudged through the forest, he kept his ears open to see if he could hear any sign of Bel. _That bastard is in so much trouble when I get to him. He freakin' leaves to 'get some help for me' and then he __doesn't come back. What an amazing husband he is..._

Fran stopped walking as a sudden thought hit him.

Bel actually _was_ a good husband.

_Well, damn. That was a very sudden thought..._

He looked down at the ground. "Swallow me. Now."

The ground refused and closed its mouth even more.

Fran stomped on it. "You suck."

The ground pouted.

But now that Fran actually thought about it, Bel wasn't a bad husband. Sure, Bel was a little... different, but he'd always been different. Most husbands liked to go golfing; Bel liked to find people to stab. Most husbands worked 9 to 5 jobs; Bel, apparently, killed people for a living. Most husbands were not royalty; Bel was a prince. Most husbands wooed their significant other with love songs, flowers, dates and chocolate; Bel had forced a kiss on him and tricked him into signing a marriage certificate. In other words, Bel had forced their marriage on him. Most husbands took their significant other on a _romantic _honeymoon; He and Bel were trapped in a jungle for a month and had to learn to survive together.

Okay, so maybe Bel was a _little_ bit different-

Screw that, he was so different he was on another planet.

But Fran gave a little smile. _Maybe this won't be so bad after all. ...But I still need to think about this..._

Shivering, Fran pulled Bel's jacket around him tighter, and he caught himself smelling it, a small smile appearing on his face. "Bel-senpai actually smells really... good."

And Bel _did_ smell good. Too good in fact. Fran liked it.

That wasn't a good sign.

Or maybe it was.

Fran didn't know.

By the time Fran realized that he'd been spending the majority of his time debating whether or not Bel smelled good instead of thinking of ways to kill said husband, he was back at the cabin. He sighed and walked into the cabin. "Senpai?"

There was no answer, so he made his way through the rooms. The bathroom was empty. As was the kitchen, the sort-of living room, and the bedroom-

Fran paused in the bedroom doorway. There was nothing out of place, except for the covers on the bed. They looked like someone had slept on them. They looked like someone had slept on them recently. Fran frowned.

"Senpai..."

Fran quickly did the math (messed up sheets + no Bel = Bel fell asleep, then woke up, realized what he'd done and left rather quickly) and sighed. Then he felt the emotion one usually paired up with the saying 'I'm pissed' rising up in him and stormed out of the cabin. He knew that Bel would be making his way back to the cliff, so the only natural and smart thing would be to go back to said cliff and catch up with his husband.

Fran would later think back on this moment, hate himself a little bit for not waiting at the cabin, but would be glad that he still made a stupid decision all the same.

[*]*[*]

Prince the Ripper was, truly, madly in love with Fran.

He just didn't know how to show it.

At all.

He wasn't good when it came to those 'oh, darling, I completely love you so let me be all romantic and gushy and totally make you swoon with happiness' moments. He preferred knives to chocolate, blood to flowers, and green haired frogs to other women and men. Thinking of his frog, Bel giggled and let his smile grow.

"Froggy, froggy, froggy, frog. Froggy, froggy, froggy, frog. Oh, how I do love my Frog."

And he did.

And so, since he was very much in love with Fran, he felt terrible for falling asleep when he was supposed to be saving said Frog. But he'd been so tired, and his dream had totally been worth it.

He honestly didn't know why Fran hadn't fallen in love with him. He'd kissed him, hadn't stabbed him, and he'd freaking married him!

"_Listen, Bel, sweetie. When you get older, you're going to find yourself caring a lot for someone else. Now, when you find them, you'll have to do all sorts of nice things – and when I say nice I mean nice; you can't stab them or force them to do anything they don't want to do – to get them to care for you a lot as well."_

His mom's words soared over him, and he stopped his mental flashback at two words: _force them_.

He stopped walking and let a little snicker lose.

_Force them. Oops._

He'd forced Fran. To kiss him, to live with him, to _marry_ him.

He snickered again.

Oh well!

[*]*[*]

Squalo was pissed.

He was _seriously_ pissed.

_How hard is it to track one large, overly groomed, lion/tiger?_

"And I'm sorry, but I really haven't seen him, but if I do then you will be the first person that I tell, and then you won't feel like you have to slice me in half with your sword arm and I have a family; a wife, three children, a dog, and a bunny, and we have a white picket fence in front of our house. The grass is green, really green, and I mow the lawn every week. I pay my taxes, and I wash my car! Please don't kill me!"

Squalo stared at him. _Am I really that scary?_

The man was trembling and was on his knees, his palms glued together and his head bowed.

Now Squalo was no longer pissed.

He was depressed.

Really depressed.

"So please don't tell Lord Xanxus about me not keeping an eye on the security cameras when my wife came over for Happy Hour and-"

"VOOI!" Squalo shouted, effectively shutting the man in charge of Head Security up. "I do _not _want to hear about that. I don't! I will not tell Xanxus about your..._happy hour_."

The man beamed, looking less shaken than he had earlier. But then Squalo continued speaking.

"But I am going to tell him that you stopped watching the cameras when your wife came over."

And so, Squalo left, the poor security man sweating a river around him. _Why am I the one who has to deal with all of these idiots?_

He was stalking out into the castle garden when he saw the little brown-haired friend of Fran's. _What's his name? Tuna?_ Well, if he had to go Pet Hunting, he should at least have some form of entertainment. "VOOI! You, the squirt walking by the rose bush!"

The man looked up, stared at him for a second; Squalo watched his face pale before he turned on his heel and made a bee-line back to the castle.

A vein somewhere in Squalo's forehead area popped.

_Hell. No._

"VOOOOI!"

The kid started running. "I didn't do anything! Don't kill me!"

Squalo whipped out his sword, because he knew that it would make the kid feel even _less_ threatened, and took off after him.

_You really are an idiot_, the logical part of his brain stated dully. Squalo tried to ignore the fact that his logical part of his brain sounded a lot like Fran.

_But that's what Squalo's known for! Whipping out his sword whenever he feels like it, _the other side of his brain said back. This side of him sounded a lot like Bel.

Squalo shook his head and focused on his target.

_Target is in sight._

_Initiating back up boosters._

_Firing back up boosters in three..._

_Two..._

_One..._

With a yell, Squalo leaped forward and tackled his target to the ground. Said target flailed helplessly underneath him. "Please don't kill me! I didn't do anything, I _swear_! It was all Fran, or...Enma... or Levi! Yes, it was Levi! _Please don't kill me!_"

Squalo growled. "VOOI! I'm not going to kill you!"

The tuna-fish looked up at him with wide eyes. "You're not going to make me do anything... _unusual_... are you?"

Squalo grabbed the fish by the arm and yanked him up. "VOOI, I'm not! All I'm going to do is force you to come with me, drag you around this entire town all day, while we search for Xanxus' stupid Lion/Tiger pet thing! And you don't get to say no!"

Tuna-fish gulped.

"That's more like it. Now, we have a giant freakish animal to find!"

And as Tsuna was dragged off, he could only think of one thing:

_Why me?_

[*]*[*]

When Bel arrived at the cliff and looked over, yelling, "Froggy, I'm home!" he was rather surprised when he was met with an empty cliff ledge. "Hmm..."

He sat back and began to think.

_So, if I take this... then add it to that...multiply by seventeen... divide by four... multiply by the square root of the number given, contemplate the need to use pi, add the height of the cliff, the length, the width, and the speed of the wind... My estimated guess would be that my little Froggy got tired of waiting for me, climbed up the cliff and made his way back to the cabin..._

A giant smile appeared on Bel's face and he sighed dreamily. "Ah...my little Froggy..."

He stood up and turned on his heel, his lovely animal friends (a scorpion, a fire ant, and Gollum) following him back to the forest. Before he actually made it to the trees again, he turned and pointed a knife at Gollum. "You're in the wrong story. Go away."

Gollum hissed, screeching out a "_my precious_" before hobbling away and vanishing over the cliff.

Bel sighed before heading back into the jungle. All he had to do was catch up with his Frog at the cabin. He really wanted to hold his Frog in his arms, and stab him, and make him bleed and cry because _goddammit _he wanted to hear Fran moan. In some sort of way.

He stopped walking.

He was in an odd mood.

_I need to kill something. Like now._

A squirrel darted in front of him, chasing a nut of some sorts. It stopped exactly in the middle of the path and pawed at the nut, making a cute little squeaking noise. Then it froze, and its head rose up slowly to look at Bel.

Bel stared at it.

The squirrel stared back, before shrinking a little bit to the ground. It squeaked again.

Bel continued to stare at it.

Then he raised his knife.

The squirrel's eyes widened and it started to shiver. Bel walked slowly up to it, knife still raised. If the squirrel wasn't so terrified, it would have moved away, bolted, but it was nailed to the ground, terror making its limbs unable to work, and its heart pounding in its little squirrel ears. Tears began to form at the squirrel's eyes, and it did everything it could to stop the tears from falling down its face. This could not be happening! It just couldn't!

Bel stopped a few feet away from the squirrel, knife raised high. The squirrel looked up at him with its wide, terrified eyes.

Bel raised the knife.

"This is stupid," he muttered, lowering the knife and walking past the squirrel and the nut.

When he was gone, the squirrel promptly had a heart attack.

[*]*[*]

_I'm not getting sick, I'm not getting sick, I'm not getting sick, I'm not getting sick, I'm not getting sick, I'm not getting sick, I'm not-_

Fran's eyes started to water and he sneezed three times in succession. He shook his head and blinked his eyes quickly to get rid of the water in them.

Then he coughed.

Then he swore.

"I'm not getting sick!"

_I think that we understood the first time, darling._

Fran blinked and turned, only to see the lion-thing sitting behind him, its head cocked to the side. "Hi, Bester," he said, wondering if he was developing a fever.

_Hi._ Bester stated, walking up to him and nipping at his hand. _You look pale_.

"Geez, thanks. My self-esteem has shot through the roof," he replied in monotone.

_Of course. Any time_.

Fran rolled his eyes-

And then coughed.

Again_._

This time, it didn't sound like a normal cough. It sounded... yucky and phlegm-y and all gross. The last time he got a cough like this, he'd been diagnosed with pneumonia and was out of school for two months. _Like hell I'm letting that happen again._

He shivered, and instinctively pulled Bel's jacket tighter around his body. "This feels good," he said to Bester. "It smells good, too..."

Bester yawned. _You like him_.

"No, this just feels...good."

_You said that it also smelled good._

"No, I didn't."

_Sure. So, tell me, how's Egypt treating you?_

"Well, actually, Egypt is a wonderful place, and every time I've gone on a dig there, I've always found some very interesting bones and remains of old villages and-"

He stopped, blinked, then cocked his head to the side. Bester stopped walking beside him. _What is it?_

Fran pointed to in front of him.

A squirrel was laying on the ground, its tail and legs twitching randomly, and its tongue flopping out of its mouth. Fran let out a 'huh', before closing his mouth. "That's not something you get to see every day. Have you ever seen anything like that before?" He asked Bester.

Bester was staring at the squirrel as well. _No, because I'm not allowed to be outside of the mansion every day. Duh._

"Huh..."

And then Fran continued walking.

_So, you like your husband._

"I _don't_."

_Uh huh..._

"...okay, maybe a little."

[*]*[*]

By the time Bel had gotten back to the cabin, he'd been attacked by three bears, he'd killed two of them, and he'd convinced one of the not-dead-bears to let him ride on their back for a while because 'my feet are killing me, and Prince's feet are _not_ supposed to kill them. Ushishishi.'

But, when he got back to the cabin, the cabin was still Frog-less. Bel growled.

"DAMMIT!"

And he turned around, thinking that maybe love was not strong enough to overpower the anger he was feeling towards his little Frog.

[*]*[*]

When Fran made it back to the cliff, he sighed in annoyance when he saw that the cliff was Prince the Ripper-less.

He was rather confused as to why he was sad at that fact.

_It's because you like him_, Bester said, licking his paw.

Fran sighed. "Please tell me that you didn't eat that squirrel from earlier..."

_...Okay, I won't tell you._

Sighing, Fran turned around, stumbling a little bit as he went. "Come on, Bester..."

When Bester didn't respond, Fran looked over his shoulder and almost gagged. "Did you _have _to hack that back up?"

Bester did his best lion-shrug. _It didn't taste okay._

Fran frowned and continued back into the forest. "My life sucks..."

[*]*[*]

Bel was pissed.

Seriously, where the _hell_ was his wife? He'd been back to the cliff edge twice, but there was. No. Fran.

_Dammit!_ _I just want to hug my wife!_

He froze. "Well, that was a rather emotional revelation. I should reward myself. With blood."

And so he decided to find something to kill as he made his way back to the cabin.

Again.

[*]*[*]

"I'm kind of disturbed now... I don't know if we really saw that, of if I'm having some sort of fever-induced dream."

_No, we really did see two bears carved up and plastered on those trees._

"Okay, I was just verifying... Means that Bel-senpai must have come this way, huh?"

_You sounded really eager just then._

"...Okay, maybe I did. Sue me."

_I don't think that I will. I'm an animal. What would I get out of it?_

"Good question..."

The cabin was, of course, empty.

Fran sighed. "Well, here we go again."

[*]*[*]

Mukuro was actually happy, which was enough to send Enma screeching for the castle doctor. He didn't bother to correct the red head, and instead he sat down on one of the very comfy couches and sipped the wine that he'd been handed when he'd entered. When Enma returned, he was red-faced and gasping.

"S-so, welcome, Master M-Mukuro."

Mukuro inclined his head. "So, where is he?"

Enma suddenly looked as though the reason he'd been running around trying to find the doctor was more for his own reasons, and not because Mukuro was happy. "Uh..."

Mukuro crunched the wine glass in his hand, keeping his 'I'm totally pissed but I'm going to keep looking cool because I can' smile on his face, and ignoring the glass that was piercing his skin and the blood dripping down his arm. "Where. Is he?"

Enma gulped harshly. "Squalo has taken him around town to look for Master Xanxus' pet and they won't be back until later tonight so please don't kill me or sell me or use me to make some sort of odd food dish!"

By the end of the sentence, Enma was actually bowing.

Mukuro raised an eyebrow. "Does he know I'm here?"

Enma hurriedly shook his head. "N-no, sir!"

Mukuro's grin grew absolutely feral. "_Excellent."_

[*]*[*]

The fourth time Fran found himself at the cabin – still Bel-less – he gave up.

"You know," he said to Bester. "I give up. I'm going to go inside, warm up, and fall asleep. I feel like shit."

_You sound like shit._

"I so love you too."

_No, we all know that you really love your husband but you're still having a party in Egypt so I will not continue to bother you with this._

"Thank you."

They were almost back to the cabin when Fran stopped again. "I hate having fevers..." he grumbled.

In front of him, or what he thought was in front of him, was something out of a Zelda game. "I can't believe that I'm looking at a LikeLike."

_A whatwhat?_

"From the Legend of Zelda. It's the creatures that grab you and eat your shield before spitting you out. They suck." He sighed and walked around the LikeLike, ignoring the 'swooshyswooshy' sound it was making. "I don't have a stupid shield, you dumb LikeLike! And I'm not giving you my clothes!" He turned right and began to make his towards the cabin that was now in sight. "I can't believe you didn't know what that thing was, Bester."

_How the hell would I know about that? I'm a lion! I don't play video games!_

"You need to get out more," Fran said as they arrived at the cabin.

Fran walked up the stairs to the cabin door, took one step in and collapsed.

Bester sighed. _Do I have to do _everything_ myself?_

[*]*[*]

Bel was beyond killing animals at this point. When he got like this, only one thing could calm him down enough to get him thinking rationally:

Seeing Fran.

_But,_ he thought harshly, _I can't find him!_

Three years previously, when he'd been trying to locate Fran's whereabouts, he'd gotten so murderous that he almost ended up wiping out an entire section of his kingdom. The only thing that stopped him was a picture of his Frog that he carried with him at all time. It was one he'd taken during his watching (coughstalkingcough) period, where Fran had been sort of-not really smiling. It always made Bel's heart flutter happily.

But right now, it wasn't doing him any good. He threw his arms up above his head, his head tilting up to face the sky. "I just need to see my Frog!"

"Meow."

Bel glanced in front of him to see-

"Mr. Little Princess Fluffypoo?"

The lion/I have no idea what this animal is/tiger was sitting by the cabin stairs, staring at him. Then he cocked his head up at the door.

Bel stared at him for a while before he bolted up the stairs. When he opened the door to the cabin, he couldn't help keep the smile off his face at seeing Fran lying on the ground. "Ushishishi, you're such a cute Frog."

"M'not a frog."

Bel leaned down and scooped his Frog into his arms. "You look like shit."

"Thanks. I feel so much better now."

Bel sighed and carried him into the bedroom. "Let's get you warmed up, alright?"

He laid Fran down on the bed and pulled the covers up to his neck, tucking him in. "I'll make you some soup or...something. I dunno..."

"Don't burn the place down..."

Bel snickered. "Ushishishi. Won't make any promises," he chirped as he leaned down and placed a gentle kiss on Fran's lips.

He was leaving the room when he heard Fran call out to him.

"Senpai?"

"Hmm?"

"You know, I think that I'm starting to like you..."

Bel froze.

"But, I'm sick at the moment, so even I don't know if everything that I'm saying is completely true... Well, I do usually tell the truth when I'm sick, so, yes, I think that I'm starting to like you."

Bel grinned. "Ushishishi."

"But this is the only time I'm saying it. When this damn fever goes away, I don't think that I'll be all gushy and romantic, so don't expect that."

Bel leaned on the door frame, his arms folded over his chest. "So...? What does that mean?"

"It means I'm willing to give this marriage thing a chance."

Bel snickered again, but was then pushed forward when Fran tossed a pillow at him. "Now, go make me some food. I'm hungry."

"Yes, my little Froggy."

"I'm not a frog!"

[*]*[*]

Squalo was about ready to kill something. Even the little Tuna-boy that was helping him find Xanxus' stupid pet lion-thing. They'd looked all over the fucking town, and no one had seen any sign of the pet.

He was so pissed, that as soon as his phone rang he answered it and bellowed, "What do you want?"

"Well, shithead, I forgot that today is the day that I let Mr. Little Princess Fluffypoo play in the jungle. He's back now. Come back and get the cooks to make the meat right."

Xanxus hung up.

Squalo crushed his phone in his fists.

Tsuna looked very scared.

Squalo blew up.

"I HATE LIFE!"

From his corner in Xanxus' room, Bester frowned as he heard Squalo's yell, then he growled as one of Xanxus' caretakers cooed at him.

"Who is a cute little lion? Mr. Little Princess Fluffypoo is, that's who! Yes you are, _yes you are!_"

_Yeah, and _you_ hate life? Pansy...  
_

_

* * *

_

**Author's Notes:**

I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT HAPPENED HERE. SERIOUSLY. I DON'T.

So, I decided that I should try putting the author's notes down here. I think that it looks prettier. ...well, I know that author's notes aren't pretty at all, but let me enjoy this little change. Well, I'm in a sad mood (because I killed off a squirrel). I REALLY DIDN'T WANT TO DO IT! ...well, here's another part with the squirrel, because I really don't like killing animals, even in stories (I'm a wuss. I can't even kill ants), so here's more of the Squirrel:

"And Bel was all, "I'm going to kill you squirrel!" and the squirrel was all, "NOOOOOO!" and Bel was all, "YESSS!" and the squirrel was all, "NOOOOO!" and then Fran popped out of a conveniently placed whole in the ground and was all, "DON'T KILL THE SQUIRREL!" and Bel was all, "MY FROG!" and then the squirrel was all, "what the hell? Where did _that _come from?". And then Fran ran over to Bel and was all, "I've been thinking, and I really do like you." and Bel was all, "YESSS!" and Fran was all, "You can now kiss me without me having to label it as sexual assault." and Bel was all, "YESSSSSSSSSSSS!" and then they kissed happily ever after and had many man-frog-prince babies, completely throwing out the logic in biology that male + male =/= baby and lived as one with the jungle and all of the squirrels and weird plants and cliffs and bears and minks.

And the squirrel got the nut that it was chasing after. THE END."

So there. There's more of the squirrel. I must say, if I had actually been feeling like ending this story right there and then, the above would be how it would have ended. Really. I'm being totally serious right now.

Okay, so maybe I'm not.

So, I am SOOOOO totally sorry that this chapter is this late! I completely ran out of steam and inspiration to write this, and I constantly found myself reading the reviews for this story, thinking COME ON INSPIRATION, COME ON! But inspiration was all, "PFFT. I ain't gonna work for you anymore" and left me. -pouts- Anyway, eventually I found inspiration again and chained him to my wall in my apartment... -whistles innocently- I would really appreciate some feedback, input, thoughts, and cookies (because cookies rock) on this! INSPIRATION, YOU BETTER STAY PUT WHERE YOU ARE!

A gigantic hug and THANK YOU goes out to everyone who reviewed the story (and reviews) and/or alerts/favorites/reads it. I hearts you guys, so much.

And another BIG thank you to the wonderful individual who edited this chapter for me (b'cuz mah editing skillz, liek, sukz. Srsly) OneWhoSitsWithTheTurtles (_she writes _AMAZING _Inception fics, btw)_

I love you all, and I really hope to update soon!

UO

(ps: WHY IS THIS AUTHOR'S NOTE SO EFFING LONG?)


	8. In which a frog could maybe be in love

**_Disclaimer: _**I do not own Katekyo Hitman Reborn! I also don't own a quality laptop that won't delete things that I need in life. Like my stories and ideas. Fuck my life**_  
_**

* * *

At the moment, there was not one _fuck_ in the world that Fran could give.

He was lying on his stomach, head resting on his crossed arms as Belphegor kneaded his upper back. If he could, he would purr. If it wasn't something that would probably (and most certainly) cause Bel to shoot off of him, ask him what the hell was wrong with him, and pelt him with knives. Which, of course, Bel would do randomly because he was bored, but Fran really didn't want to it to happen at the moment.

They were currently on day twenty of _Hey! We're just going to stick you guys in a huge ass jungle with odd creatures and shit for an entire month! Have fun!_ And so far, they had yet to kill each other, which Fran had to say, was rather _awesome_. Because he was finding that, yeah okay, his husband was rather hot and at times could be amazing and caring.

"Your back is so pretty. It makes me want to cut it open."

_At times_ he could be amazing and caring.

_At times_.

"Senpai... Get off me if you're just going to think thoughts about marring my back."

He was pushed forward more, with an 'oomph' as Bel fell against him. "But you're _comfy_."

"And you're annoying me. So are you going to get off?"

"Hmm... No."

Oh. Well, okay then.

With a sigh, Fran turned his head so that he could look up at Bel. "What's on your mind right now?"

Over the past few days, while nursing Fran back to health after catching a rather horrible cold, Bel had become more talkative. Well, more talkative than he'd originally been; he'd been adding Talking About Bel's Feelings to the list and Fran was really surprised to find that he enjoyed it when Bel spoke about the things that he liked and disliked. He felt like he was finally getting to know his husband as a person instead of the cold blooded killer that he'd been forced to marry.

It was a start.

A small one, but a start.

Bel leaned down and planted a soft kiss at the top of his spine; it had taken a lot of bribing to get Fran to agree to take off his shirt for the massage, but in the end he was glad that he did. "How pretty you'd look with my marks on you."

Fran placed his head back down on his arms. "That's _so_ romantic, honey."

"Really?"

Bel sounded so pleased of himself that Fran couldn't resist rolling his eyes. "I was being sarcastic."

"Oh."

Tilting his head to the side, Fran asked, "What mark?"

"Hmm?"

"What mark would you put on me? Like a tattoo?"

Bel snickered and placed a few more kisses down Fran's spine. Fran may have shivered. He _may_ have shivered. "No, I'd carve my name into your skin."

Fran frowned. "I'm not _that_ kinky, Bel-senpai."

"Shi shi. And what if _I_am?"

"Then our sex life is going to be even more non-existent than it is now," Fran stated firmly, rolling his shoulders a bit, barely holding out his gasp as Bel followed his movements with his lips. Ever since Fran had admitted to liking him, Bel had been increasingly touchy-feely. Fran really didn't know what to make of it.

"We have a sex life?"

"No, but if you keep talking about _carving_ thing into my skin, there will _never be one_."

Bel leaned forward and shoved his face right next to Fran's. He breathed out heavily and then pouted. "I _want_ a sex life, though, Froggy. I want one _real bad_."

Fran placed his pointer finger on Bel's hair covered forehead and pushed him back slightly. "Then go get one."

Not even one millisecond later he realized that he _probably_ shouldn't have said that; the _smile_ that appeared on Bel's face was slightly off putting, seeing as he'd never seen Bel smile like that, and he was graced with that smile for about half a second before Bel _pounced_.

He was able to get out half a yelp before Bel's lips descended on his, his husband eager and, he had to admit, rather forceful with his advances. Since his mouth had already been open because of his apparent need to yelp every time Bel kissed him, there was nothing to stop the prince from shoving his tongue straight into Fran's mouth right from the get go. _Eager little thing, aren't you_, Fran thought as he rolled his eyes before he let them drift shut as his Bel rolled them.

Bel ended up on top of him, which Fran didn't complain about at all. Bel was an enthusiastic kisser, which countered Fran's lazy kissing style perfectly; he let Bel take control because he couldn't be bothered with the so-called "domination" of the kisses they shared. He shifted underneath Bel so that they were chest to chest and slid a hand up to tangle in Bel's hair.

Bel tasted like apples and rain, which Fran found himself wanting to taste more of. He slid his both of his hands farther into Bel's hair and scraped his fingernails against his scalp, secretly loving the groan that escaped Bel's lips. Bel exhaled through his nose and the air bounced across his face, causing him to scrunch up his nose as the need to itch took over. "Senpai," he mumbled out once Bel left his mouth in favor of the spot right underneath his ear; the one spot that always managed to turn him into a pile of goo.

In response to him talking, Bel lightly bit the skin where his mouth was before locking his lips around it and sucking on the skin.

_Oh, okay then, _Fran thought as he lost the ability to move his limbs. _You go ahead and do that, uh-huh. Just make me lose all ability to even-_

His thoughts were cut off as he let out a yelp, feeling Bel's teeth sink into his skin suddenly. "H-hey!"

Bel pulled his teeth away and ran his tongue over where he'd bit the skin. "Hmm?"

"What was that for?"

"I told you I wanted to mark your skin."

"So you... _bit_ me?"

Bel let out a laugh, one that caused his nose to crinkle. It looked so adorable that Fran couldn't help but lean up and press a kiss to the nose. The laugh immediately vanished and once he'd laid back down on the bed Fran knew that Bel was staring at him.

"What?"

Bel leaned down so that they were pressed chest to chest. "That was the first time you did something that cute to me."

_Oh. Well, okay then_.

Fran let out a huff of air and then pushed Bel off of him. "Get off, senpai. We need to eat, okay?"

Bel frowned, but rolled away with Fran's push, then collapsed on the bed next to him and threw his limbs out. "The prince isn't that hungry, really."

Fran froze, halfway off of the bed. "...really."

Bel shrugged. "Yeah, I haven't been hungry lately. Dunno why, though..."

Fran let a frown appear on his face. "If you're getting sick-"

'The prince doesn't get sick."

It was said with such firmness that Fran held his hands up. "Okay, okay. You don't get sick. Sure." He stood up, then put his hands together and pushed them above his head, arching his back and scrunching his face up as he stretched. Since he'd been sick, Bel had not let him get out of the bed, claiming that he could take care of Fran himself.

He'd been surprisingly good at it.

He was still stretching when Bel crawled over and traced a finger around the small of his back, the coldness sinking through to his skin from where his shirt had ridden up. Fran let out a yelp and side-stepped away from the finger, then looked over his shoulder and glared at Bel. He was going to open his mouth when he took note of the pale skin and the sweat starting to cover Bel's face. "Senpai, I think that you're getting sick."

Bel let out a 'che' sound and rolled back on to his back. "I don't _get sick_, freak," he said as he grabbed the comforter and yanked it over him, rolling around twice so that he was completely covered, burrito style, in the blanket.

"Uh huh," Fran said. "You're a lying wuss, Senpai," he deadpanned, turning on his heel to walk to the window; he looked out at the rain, then pushed the window open, letting the cold air rush in.

"H-hey! It's cold!"

"Feels nice, actually..."

"Fuck you."

"You'd like that, wouldn't you?"

{~*~}

Tsuna had always sucked at hide and seek.

He'd always been the first person found during the first round, and he was always stuck at finding everyone for the rest of the time they spent playing it. He'd thought that running from his pissed off boss and Fran when he had headaches would have helped increase his ability to hide.

He was learning, rather quickly, that he _still_ sucked at hide and seek.

"For just how long are you planning on running away from me?"

Tsuna let out an 'eep' and dashed from where he was hiding from behind a curtain. "Until Fran signs that release form!" He turned the corner sharply and promptly found his next hiding spot.

Mukuro let out a tired sigh. "He's not going to sign the fucking release form, you idiot. It's his payback, or whatever. Just _deal with it_," he growled out as he walked down the hall, not even bothering to run after the shorter man; he'd find him within the next five minutes, anyway.

Sure enough, not even one minute later, a scuffling sound came from behind a rather large pot and he walked over to it, then reached in and grabbed the thin arm and yanked Tsuna out. He came kicking (and Mukuro was pretty sure that he'd actually been bit – the kid was gaining some points. He probably wasn't going to be his favorite, like Fran, but he would be up there), not wanting to give into his fate.

"No, I'm not going to be your apprentice, I _won't_! I won't, I won't, I won't, I won't, I won't-"

Rolling his eyes, Mukuro placed him on the ground, put a finger underneath Tsuna's chin, tilted it up and planted a quick kiss to the moving lips. He'd learned that the most efficient way to get a person to shut up was to kiss them.

Tsuna? He proved that theory _wrong_.

He did not shut up once Mukuro kissed him – in fact, he got _louder_, and his punches started to _hurt_. "Yough bsterrdfd gerrooff m'!"

Mukuro only backed down once Tsuna bit him because _ow_. "Okay, okay," he said, laughing softly to himself once he got a good look at Tsuna's face when he pulled away. Tsuna had his eyes closed tight, his lips puckered and frowning and his face turned up; his fists were still going to town on Mukuro's chest. "I guess I'll let you go hide now, let your panic build to a boiling point," he laughed out, ruffling Tsuna's hair as he turned away and headed down the hall.

Tsuna yelled after him. "So what? You're just going to start randomly kissing me now? See if I work for you now!"

Mukuro let his laugh out and it bounced around the walls as he continued to walk. "Sure thing, shorty!"

Tsuna's half yelp half growl had Mukuro smirking for the rest of the evening.

{~*~}

Bel was _madly_ in love with Fran. He honestly was, even though he didn't really know how to show it.

Since there was only one bed in the cottage, they shared it, and he loved waking up earlier than his husband because it meant that he could just _watch_ him. Sometimes he'd run his hands through Fran's hair or let his fingers glide over the skin on Fran's face, caressing and touching. Other times he plant a few kisses randomly on Fran's face and then watch until the frog woke up.

Fran just... _got _him, like no other person had. He'd never been intimidated, had never taken any shit from him, and had always fought back with a fire in his eyes that never showed in his voice or facial expressions. Bel was glad that it had been Fran that he'd fallen in love with – he was pretty much perfect for him.

At the moment, Fran was still sleeping, both his arms bent and up, resting by his head. Bel watched as his chest rose and fell with every breath, a small smile on his face. The only time he'd really seen Fran laid open had been while he was sleeping, otherwise, Fran was just emotionless and blank. Bel _really_ liked seeing Fran like that – he wanted to be the only one who saw Fran like that.

He slipped one hand underneath his head and reached over to run a finger over Fran's cheek. Fran's eyebrows furrowed slightly and his head turned towards the direction of Bel's finger. Snickering softly, Bel leaned down and placed a soft kiss to Fran's forehead, then he shifted his face so that it was burried in his husband's hair. He stayed there for a few minutes, basking in his happiness.

A sharp breeze of wind blew through the open window; Fran shivered but didn't move. Frowning at the goosebumps showing up on Fran's skin, Bel slid out of the bed covers and headed over to the window. He slid it shut slowly so that it didn't slam shut once it was finally closed, then, rubbing his arms, made a dash for the bed and slid underneath the covers. As he did so, Fran shivered again, so Bel reached over and scooped him up, then pulled the comforter up and over them so that only their heads were uncovered.

"Froggy..." he whispered, watching the way that Fran's eyes were moving back and forth underneath his eyelids.

Fran's head shifted closer to him at the words.

"I love you, Fran."

A tiny smile appeared on Fran's lips, and Bel loved it. He leaned forward, planted a quick kiss to that smile, then snuggled his face into the spot where Fran's neck met his shoulders and promptly fell asleep.

Five minutes later, once Bel was in a deep sleep, Fran cracked his eye open, then glanced down at the sleeping prince. "I think I might love you too, Bel."

{~*~}

Bel was sick.

And not in the, _I'm going to kill you for the fun of it_ sick.

He was just sick.

As in, _fuck my life why is everything so cold and FUCK! Don't take the blankets away you fucker! I'll kill you!_ kind of sick

Fran supposed that Bel had caught the cold that Fran had had previously, but when the rain had been pouring for four days straight, he wasn't sure if it was because one of the windows had a leak or if Bel was just being his normal stupid self and rushing out in the rain to find them food.

Fran would find them food.

He could.

Bel wouldn't let him, though.

_The fucker..._

With a sigh, he grabbed the water that he'd put into a bowl and walked over to the bed. Bel was laying on it, a permanent frown on his face. Fran rolled his eyes. "Oh please. Stop with the pouting, senpai. At least it's just a cold."

Bel's frown deepened. "'m not sick," he said. Then he turned his head and proceeded to cough for two minutes straight.

Fran sat down next to him on the bed and watched as Bel tried to scoot way from him. He followed every time until Bel's only option for moving was to roll off of the bed.

"Go'way," Bel said through his stuffy nose.

"You're a really whiny bitch when you're sick, senpai," Fran deadpanned as he picked up the water-soaked cloth and laid it across Bel's forehead.

"...shuddup," Bel whined and Fran sighed.

"Senpai, just let me take care of you this time, okay? It's what couples do."

Bel froze, which allowed Fran to dab at his forehead with the cloth. "Do...do you mean it?" Bel asked hesitantly.

"Mean what?"

"What you said... about couples taking care of each other..."

Fran cocked his head to the side to give Bel a few seconds to panic before he nodded. "Yes, I supposed that I do. I mean, we're married, and I already said that I like you. This whole jungle experience could be considered the mother fucker of horrible dates, but oh well. And I..." He bit his lip, then decided to hell with it. "And there's a rather _large_ chance that I'm falling in love with you."

The look that Bel gave him was blinding, so blinding that Fran had to lean down to give Bel a soft kiss. He pulled away after a few moments, then bit out, "If I get sick again, I'm killing you, whether I'm in love with you by then or not."

Bel's snickering that turned into a rather rough coughing session was enough to put the smile back on Fran's face for a while -

At least until Bel grabbed him and forced him underneath the covers, then forced him to engage in a long cuddle/nap session.

That? That put the smile on Fran's face for the rest of the day.

* * *

_**Author's notes:**_

HEEEEEEEY. I'M ALIVE.

Soooooooo so sooo sorry that this took so long! I feel like I need to beg for forgiveness.

And also, I'm sorry about the length. I wanted it to be longer, but the original draft for this story had this chapter _shorter_ than what it is now. The next chapter will be longer, though! I am already working on it! I can't give you a specific date for the next chapter, but know that it won't take as long as this one did.

Anyway, I'd appreciate feedback and all that shit.

I hope that you enjoyed this chapter! They're making progress. :D

**Fall in love, Fran. It's easy. Just do it.**

Also, I now have a tumblr. And it's fucking awesome. I love it. If you ever want to chat or some shit, hit me up! The link is in my profile.**  
**

Love,

UO

(ps: I still stand by my statement in my previous author's note for this chapter: go eat pie. Seriously. I had some yesterday. It's fucking delicious.)


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